Recs aren't [are!] necessary

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by abbeydae

Well at my school, you're required to have a rec letter in order to get a bid. If I didn't have older friends, I never would have known that.

The university said that "Letters of Recommendation are encouraged, but not required." I asked if they were necessary and my Gamma/Rho Chi's said they absolutely are. Over half of the girls in my group did not know we needed one, and one half of those girls had no idea what a rec letter is.

Can the university say that and still require them for a bid?

It's not your school that requires them, it's individual organizations, and it could be that all the organizations on your campus happen to require them.

Hopefully the Recruitment Counselors will be able to step in and let PNM's know they need recs.

[FSUZeta]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

It's not your school that requires them, it's individual organizations, and it could be that all the organizations on your campus happen to require them.

Hopefully the Recruitment Counselors will be able to step in and let PNM's know they need recs.

recruitment counselors spout the party line, plus at schools where recommendations are a must, by the time you meet your r.c. it is too late to send in a rec.

[abbeydae]

Alumiyum and FSUZeta, what do girls who didn't get recs do about bids? I know there are out of state (or even in state) girls who have no connections in a house and therefore, do not know to they have to get rec letters.
What if a chapter absolutely loves a girl, but she didn't get any rec letters. Does she still get a bid?
I cannot imagine not being granted a bid because of something I wasn't informed of! Is there a way around them?

[sydney bristow]

Originally Posted by abbeydae

Alumiyum and FSUZeta, what do girls who didn't get recs do about bids? I know there are out of state (or even in state) girls who have no connections in a house and therefore, do not know to they have to get rec letters.
What if a chapter absolutely loves a girl, but she didn't get any rec letters. Does she still get a bid?
I cannot imagine not being granted a bid because of something I wasn't informed of! Is there a way around them?

Maybe I'll get flack for this but I'm just going to say it. AbbeyDae, after reading your posts on this and other threads I think you might be bordering on becoming a classic "overconfident PNM".

You haven't even been through recruitment yet and definitely aren't in a sorority so you don't need to be saying how "your university requires them for a bid" because that simply is not true.

It's great that you have friends in chapters and are apparently Southern and it's good that you have recs too, but none of these things guarantee you a bid.

My advice? Stop posting things that aren't recruitment-related questions and read the stickies. Good luck.

[baci]

Ultimately, a sorority that truly wants you in their org will find you a rec IF you don't have one. I have witnessed this numerous times.

BUT, BUT, BUT...with the competition out there and the well prepared young ladies why would you even chance it? It just might be they have an equally qualified girl they also love that comes with a rec that could easily be offered your bid.

It simply comes down to don't take the chance.

[Barbie's_Rush]

Originally Posted by sydney bristow

Maybe I'll get flack for this but I'm just going to say it. AbbeyDae, after reading your posts on this and other threads I think you might be bordering on becoming a classic "overconfident PNM".

You haven't even been through recruitment yet and definitely aren't in a sorority so you don't need to be saying how "your university requires them for a bid" because that simply is not true.

It's great that you have friends in chapters and are apparently Southern and it's good that you have recs too, but none of these things guarantee you a bid.

My advice? Stop posting things that aren't recruitment-related questions and read the stickies. Good luck.

Amen!

Originally Posted by baci

Ultimately, a sorority that truly wants you in their org will find you a rec IF you don't have one. I have witnessed this numerous times.

BUT, BUT, BUT...with the competition out there and the well prepared young ladies why would you even chance it? It just might be they have an equally qualified girl they also love that comes with a rec that could easily be offered your bid.

It simply comes down to don't take the chance.

At my school almost every chapter will drop the pnms without recs after the first round. It's hard to dazzle a sorority into offering you a bid without a rec when you're never even asked back to attend the first invitational round.

[Titchou]

MysticCat: You asked why PNMs can't be told that SOME groups require recs. That is the question I was answering...not whether recs are required for the campus. That is an entirely different question. There is nothing in the rules that keep a CPH from telling PNMs that SOME groups require recs but they cannot tell them the namesof the ones that do...nor can they say it's requiredfor the whole campus.
I only know what you say, not what you mean to say.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by Titchou

MysticCat: You asked why PNMs can't be told that SOME groups require recs. That is the question I was answering...not whether recs are required for the campus. That is an entirely different question. There is nothing in the rules that keep a CPH from telling PNMs that SOME groups require recs but they cannot tell them the namesof the ones that do...nor can they say it's requiredfor the whole campus.
I only know what you say, not what you mean to say.

I have no idea what you're saying here. And like MC I don't know how you thought he was asking about anything that could get close to MS.

But the more we discuss it the less clear it gets.

[SWTXBelle]

To offer a take on Pascal's Wager - A PNM should wager on recs being required, because doing so a PNM has everything to gain, and nothing to lose. In other words, better to have the recs and possibly not need them, than to need them and not have them.

[Titchou]

OK, one more time and that's it. There is a difference between "you need recs" and "some groups require recs." Is there some part of that you don't understand? MC's question was with regard to telling PNMs that some require recs. MC did not ask about all groups...though I suspect that was the intention. Like I said, I only know what you say, not what you mean to say....so say what you mean because I will parse it! And I was just fending off the next question by the remark about MS....

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by Titchou

OK, one more time and that's it. There is a difference between "you need recs" and "some groups require recs." Is there some part of that you don't understand? MC's question was with regard to telling PNMs that some require recs. MC did not ask about all groups...though I suspect that was the intention. Like I said, I only know what you say, not what you mean to say....so say what you mean because I will parse it! And I was just fending off the next question by the remark about MS....

Sorry, no it's just gotten incredibly muddled

I think the perception that MC had gotten was that it was against the rules to tell PNMs about needing recs at all. However it's been clarified that it isn't wrong to say "some groups require recs, getting them isn't a bad idea."

So, perhaps to summarize:

1. College Panhellenics must not tell PNMs that it is required that they secure letters of recommendation.
2. College Panhellenics may tell PNMs that acquiring recs is a good idea and can only help their recruitment.
3. Some college Panhellenics tell PNMs that they don't need recs at all. Even if the campus is relatively uncompetitive it is still a good idea for PNMs to acquire recs anyway. If the campus is competitive it is very important for PNMs to acquire recs.
4. There are a few exceptions to every rule but there are only a few. Despite the fact that a sorority can get a rec for an otherwise rec-less PNM if they really want her, it can hurt her chances at a successful recruitment to be without them.
5. Recs are more meaningful when written by someone who knows the PNM personally, but if you don't know anyone from a particular sorority then getting a rec is the most important.

[LadyLonghorn]

The University of Texas Panhellenic Council finally decided to be honest about the recommendation situation on their web site last year:

Although recommendations are optional to participate in UT Recruitment, the majority of houses cannot invite you back past open house and may have to release you from their house without having a recommendation letter for you. Thererefore, it is HIGHLY encouraged to get recommendation letters for all 13 sororities at UT.

[Titchou]

Sometimes we say things that we think communicate correctly what we want. However, there are differences. As an example:

As my sister's 60th birthday approached, I asked her if she was having a party (she lives out of state). She said to me "It's not that I don't want a party for my birthday. What I want for my birthday is not to have a party. There is difference."

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by Titchou

Sometimes we say things that we think communicate correctly what we want.

I think my questions were pretty clear. I think your answers weren't. And I think repeatedly saying "I can only respond to what you say, not what you mean" has an almost ridiculous air of better-communicator-than-thou that outdoes my 10th grade English teacher and that was, in this case, ironic.

Let's all move on.

[Titchou]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

I think my questions were pretty clear. I think your answers weren't. And I think repeatedly saying "I can only respond to what you say, not what you mean" has an almost ridiculous air of better-communicator-than-thou that outdoes my 10th grade English teacher and that was, in this case, ironic.

Let's all move on.

Actually, it's a quote from my father...