Rushing the Second Time around...

[Greek_or_Geek?]

Originally Posted by pnmfosho

I think my biggest problem last year was that I wanted to be nice to the girl in my bid sorority, so I acted like I wanted to be there when I really didn't. My best friend was in the same situation but she flat out told the girl she wanted another house so they didn't extend their bid to her.

This is not true. Your best friend was simply higher on the other chapter's bid list. They wanted her more and she wanted them more so it was a match. This is what we call mutual selection. If her favored chapter hadn't had her so far up on their bid list, she was still on the bid list of the chapter she told she didn't want to be there (although possibly very low on that list.) Without matching to the first chapter, she could very likely have received a bid to the "less desirable" chapter through the bid matching process, quota additions etc.

The chapter you wanted didn't want you as much as they wanted all the other women who were eventually extended bids. You simply weren't high enough on their bid list to receive a bid and it has no relationship to how you behaved at the chapter you didn't want.

If your "best friend" is in a sorority and you personally know at least four other women at your school who re-rushed after declining a bid/depledging, I still can't imagine what you expect to get out of asking questions here of strangers who aren't at your school. You should know it all since you seem to have done your research, are so well connected and already have all the answers.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by Greek_or_Geek?

This is not true. Your best friend was simply higher on the other chapter's bid list. They wanted her more and she wanted them more so it was a match. This is what we call mutual selection. If her favored chapter hadn't had her so far up on their bid list, she was still on the bid list of the chapter she told she didn't want to be there (although possibly very low on that list.) Without matching to the first chapter, she could very likely have received a bid to the "less desirable" chapter through the bid matching process, quota additions etc.

The chapter you wanted didn't want you as much as they wanted all the other women who were eventually extended bids. You simply weren't high enough on their bid list to receive a bid and it has no relationship to how you behaved at the chapter you didn't want.

If your "best friend" is in a sorority and you personally know at least four other women at your school who re-rushed after declining a bid/depledging, I still can't imagine what you expect to get out of asking questions here of strangers who aren't at your school. You should know it all since you seem to have done your research, are so well connected and already have all the answers.

This. Bid matching doesn't work the way you think it does, sweetie. You just weren't high enough on the list to get a bid from the group you wanted. You could have screamed your hatred of the other group from the top of your lungs, but you would have still gotten that bid...with a bad reputation to boot.