Motivate or punish?

[sandiego_DUde]

I'm not at all saying my house is perfect; to the contrary, that's why I'm here. However, while I understand the outside reflection "not partying" gives off, and to be clear on that term we were on social probation all of last semester and we don't party as often as some guys would like but still at least 2x a month. Anyway, if people act like children, is there any reason they shouldn't be treated as such? Sad that in college that's my outlook, I know, but if we don't get our work done, it doesn't matter how much we party now if we lose our charter later. 33girl, you and I may not agree ever on certain things but please trust I'm trying to show you my side and see yours as well.

To tie up the partying issue, I'm sorry if I offended you but I felt as though it was a situation in which you were talking about something you couldn't understand, not being in a fraternity. I may have been too presumptuous and I'm sorry. No I don't see parties as threatening situations but you know, with the rumors/reality of what happens at SOME parties, it's understandable that people would often feel more at ease under other circumstances. From experience, I can tell you we've done quite well some semesters despite a lack of partying (14 man pledge class, twice). My experiences probably differ from yours but that's where I'm coming from.

The guys we don't want are the ones who only want to party anyway. If that's all we show them and that's what interests them, they'll join for the wrong reasons. It's not as popular since it's new but we do Principles Based Rushing, in which we show guys what we're about up front so we both have realistic expectations. We also are both more pleased with the outcome because nobody had false hopes. Obviously we still like to party, but within reason. Nobody wants to join an organization that's all work and no play, but we don't want an organization that's all play and no work. In fact, that's what we have now.

[SusySorostitute]

Originally Posted by sandiego_DUde

I'm not at all saying my house is perfect; to the contrary, that's why I'm here. However, while I understand the outside reflection "not partying" gives off, and to be clear on that term we were on social probation all of last semester and we don't party as often as some guys would like but still at least 2x a month. Anyway, if people act like children, is there any reason they shouldn't be treated as such? Sad that in college that's my outlook, I know, but if we don't get our work done, it doesn't matter how much we party now if we lose our charter later. 33girl, you and I may not agree ever on certain things but please trust I'm trying to show you my side and see yours as well.

To tie up the partying issue, I'm sorry if I offended you but I felt as though it was a situation in which you were talking about something you couldn't understand, not being in a fraternity. I may have been too presumptuous and I'm sorry. No I don't see parties as threatening situations but you know, with the rumors/reality of what happens at SOME parties, it's understandable that people would often feel more at ease under other circumstances. From experience, I can tell you we've done quite well some semesters despite a lack of partying (14 man pledge class, twice). My experiences probably differ from yours but that's where I'm coming from.

The guys we don't want are the ones who only want to party anyway. If that's all we show them and that's what interests them, they'll join for the wrong reasons. It's not as popular since it's new but we do Principles Based Rushing, in which we show guys what we're about up front so we both have realistic expectations. We also are both more pleased with the outcome because nobody had false hopes. Obviously we still like to party, but within reason. Nobody wants to join an organization that's all work and no play, but we don't want an organization that's all play and no work. In fact, that's what we have now.

i'm not saying it should be all play and no work by any means... but as of now your org seems to be all work and no play. considering you did not get any new pledges this semester, you may want to consider the appeal that "play" has to rushees and the image you are projecting to your campus. also consider the role that having fun, enjoying, and feeling proud of your fraternity may play in your actives' desire to get involved in the "work" aspect. if you want to discount a girl's opinion because i couldn't possibly understand, fine, but from what i gather from the guys i know in (thriving) fraternities, this is important to them too.