Visiting Chapters Thread

#1 03-23-2008, 10:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elephant Walk

If you truly find brotherhood in people you have never met, is your brotherhood worth anything anyways?

I'm not saying they're my best friends but we share the same fraternal values and rituals. Why shouldn't there be a bond? If you don't get t then you missed something along the way.

bowsandtoes · #2 03-23-2008, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PhiKapSkulls

I'm not saying they're my best friends but we share the same fraternal values and rituals. Why shouldn't there be a bond? If you don't get t then you missed something along the way.

Yes there's some type of bond, but not one that I would put much weight on. I played football in high school, does that mean I share a brotherly bond with every high school football player in the country, considering we went through the same drills (rituals?). We're not denying that there's some link made by knowing the same secrets, just that that link isn't what we consider 'brotherhood'. Especially when as I mentioned before, there are people outside the organization that know the secrets, but that doesn't make them brothers. And I'd like to think that brotherhood means something more than a check sent to nationals.

Quote:

PS- You're not better then everyone else and people make fun of you just like you make fun of the "geldheads". What a tiny little isolated wolrd you live in.

Come back in 10 years and see who's laughing at who.

ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl · #3 03-23-2008, 02:54 PM

I'm glad not everyone is impressed by downright arrogance.

I don't see what the big deal is for a weekend stay unless it's really going to be a problem...like it's too hard to put them up for a few days or they might bring legal troubles.

gtdxeric · #4 03-23-2008, 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

I don't see what the big deal is for a weekend stay unless it's really going to be a problem.

A lot can happen in a weekend. One time, guys from a chapter that was visiting mine got in a bar fight at a campus bar... wearing letters. It's worse if there's no bond of friendship between the two chapters and the visiting chapter is in town just to party, and hasn't given the host chapter time to prepare or the option to decline.

With that said, the things discussed in this thread are decisions that only the President of the chapter has to make. For all other members of the chapter, whatever the situation, I'd say to be hospitable and give them whatever benefit of the doubt you think they deserve, but keep your eyes open. If you feel like it, you might direct them toward things you think they would enjoy, but that would keep them relatively out of trouble.

There's actually something in my pledge manual about this, I'll dig it up later.

ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl · #5 03-23-2008, 04:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gtdxeric

A lot can happen in a weekend. One time, guys from a chapter that was visiting mine got in a bar fight at a campus bar... wearing letters. It's worse if there's no bond of friendship between the two chapters and the visiting chapter is in town just to party, and hasn't given the host chapter time to prepare or the option to decline.

With that said, the things discussed in this thread are decisions that only the President of the chapter has to make. For all other members of the chapter, whatever the situation, I'd say to be hospitable and give them whatever benefit of the doubt you think they deserve, but keep your eyes open. If you feel like it, you might direct them toward things you think they would enjoy, but that would keep them relatively out of trouble.

There's actually something in my pledge manual about this, I'll dig it up later.

That's a legitimate concern, as I was saying...the visiting chapter just not being "cool" isn't.

SWTXBelle · #6 03-23-2008, 05:05 PM

Back to the op - I would look at it in the same respect as in dealing with distant family members. In true southern style, my family is spread far and wide, and we all know our genealogy. They are family, but that doesn't mean I would contact my second-cousin once removed and ask to be put up for the weekend. I would feel comfortable contacting a distant family member, saying I would be in the neighborhood and would like to meet them over lunch or dinner.
Same for my sorority sisters. I always feel a bond with my sisters whom I've meet from far and wide. If I were an active and some sisters called about visiting, I'd love to meet them - but without knowing them wouldn't commit to a weekend or to putting them up in the house. So - my take on it is if fraternity brothers from XYZ want to visit, I'd suggest they come visit the house for a tour, maybe tell them where the brothers meet on Friday night and offer to help them find a hotel to stay in. That would be enough hospitality, imho. If you are having an event like a football or basketball game they could attend with you, great.

#7 03-24-2008, 03:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bowsandtoes

Come back in 10 years and see who's laughing at who.

They're already laughing (at you).

macallan25 · #8 03-23-2008, 05:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PhiKapSkulls

I'm not saying they're my best friends but we share the same fraternal values and rituals. Why shouldn't there be a bond? If you don't get t then you missed something along the way.

You don't know that. If you claim that every single member of your organization holds your fraternity's values and rituals in the same light as you do...........then you are incredibly, incredibly naive.

Champ, there are member of your fraternity that joined so they could live in a fraternity house, drink, and screw. They don't care about your ritual or the values that your founding fathers preached. They care about learning it so they can get initiated. If you think otherwise, you need to get a clue.

You are so ass deep in trying to make us look like lesser fraternity men than yourself, you don't even realize how ridiculous the things you are saying truly are.

I'm still waiting for you to tell me how I "don't get it."

FSUZeta · #9 03-23-2008, 05:25 PM

in my days in the house, we had sister guests from time to time. while we did not have a bad experience with any of the guests, they were in town to visit boyfriends or were passing thru on their way farther south and they treated the house more like just a place to stay. we did not issue them keys, so they had to work around our schedules for coming and going.

my father in law tells of a time in his fraternity house when they had visitors from another chapter staying, and the president of his chapter asked him and other brothers to give up their rooms for the weekend. when my fil returned to his room, he discovered that the visiting brother who had stayed there had helped himself to his clothes and bed linens.

33girl · #10 03-24-2008, 12:10 PM

When I was in school we called (I forget which it was) either our chapter at Penn State or the AGD chapter (my roomie's bio sister was an AGD) and wanted to come up and stay with them. They were not jazzed and said no. At the time we thought they were being bitchy, but when I look back we were the ones being jerks - it was on HOMECOMING weekend and they had to have tons of people there (and they don't have a house, just suites).

It's one thing to have 2 girls/guys come to visit, it's quite another to have a dozen plus.

Tom Earp · #11 03-24-2008, 01:29 PM

Depending on the circumstances of course along with timing we must remember that if you are a vistor of another Chapter, act like ladies/gentlemen, Sisters/Brothers, or never be able to come again.

The respect is earned, not given because of ritual and name.

brunetteddd · #12 03-24-2008, 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tom Earp

Depending on the circumstances of course along with timing we must remember that if you are a vistor of another Chapter, act like ladies/gentlemen, Sisters/Brothers, or never be able to come again.

The respect is earned, not given because of ritual and name.

I totally agree; I would treat my sisters from other chapters with respect and would want the same respect if we had visiting sisters.

In the same vein of thought, I think the same thing applies for alumni who come back onto campus for various events. A fraternity I know of had a handful of alumni stay in the house over homecoming weekend and actually had to tell them that they were no longer welcome back overnight due to the destruction and horrific behavior that was displayed by these brothers.

macallan25 · #13 03-24-2008, 03:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tom Earp

Depending on the circumstances of course along with timing we must remember that if you are a vistor of another Chapter, act like ladies/gentlemen, Sisters/Brothers, or never be able to come again.

The respect is earned, not given because of ritual and name.

Couldn't have said it better myself........this is Tom Earp correct?