Assigning Bigs/Littles

[IsobelS]

My chapter tried a lot of different things. We tried assigning littles, we tried doing the ranking system, and we tried letting the Bigs decide. Now that I am an alum and can look back, I think that they all had their flaws. The assignment system was the WORST because no one got who they really wanted and there was a lot of bickering and favoritism. It was just a mess! The ranking system was ok, but it always got messed up and someone always had their feelings hurt. And letting the Bigs decide wasn't always a good way of doing it either.

I think that now that I am kind of removed from it, it would be best to have some sort of anonymous application system where people are matched based on their interests and what they have in common.

[skylark]

Originally Posted by IsobelS

The assignment system was the WORST because no one got who they really wanted and there was a lot of bickering and favoritism. It was just a mess!

I totally agree. I was assigned a little that I couldn't stand and would have said something about it if I had been given the chance before it was already announced to the whole chapter. I could see the potential for personality conflicts the first time I hung out with her for more than five minutes. I "made nice" and took a deep breath every time she drove me nuts during her first year... but eventually I couldn't stand it, she did something really irresponsible and I refused to help cover up her mistake, and so we had a falling out. I'm sure it was confusing to her, because in her mind we were totally wonderful friends and then one day I just stopped being nice to her. In reality, I just stopped faking it for the sake of the big/little relationship. We never really were able to mend things, and it bothers me today that I was robbed of having a real big-little relationship. I think whatever system you have, the big should have a chance to veto the assignment, even if the bigs aren't allowed to specifically pick a particular person.

[Benzgirl]

In our chapter you first needed to seek out who wanted a little. It was somewhat of a time and financial commitment.
As an active, I remember ranking my top 3 (I got my #1 choice). But, I don't remember as a pledge ranking or asking for anyone. In fact, I really didn't know my big. That is not to say I didn't like her, because I did. We just didn't know each other very well and were not real close.

Originally Posted by Benzgirl

In our chapter you first needed to seek out who wanted a little. It was somewhat of a time and financial commitment.
As an active, I remember ranking my top 3 (I got my #1 choice). But, I don't remember as a pledge ranking or asking for anyone. In fact, I really didn't know my big. That is not to say I didn't like her, because I did. We just didn't know each other very well and were not real close.

That's how we did it too. Most of the time, seniors preferred not to take on a daughter because of the time and financial commitment. If they did take a daughter, it was because there were more NMs than collegians to go around.

My sister-mom was a very good friend of mine even before joining the sorority, so it was only natural that she was to be my sister-mom. Still, I don't recall the collegians ever asking us who we wanted as our sister-moms at the beginning of the pledge period.