Courthouse Ceremony then "Real" Wedding?

[SthrnZeta]

Calling Army Wife!!! J told me today he thought it would be a good idea to go down to the courthouse in September when he's home on leave and make it legal and then we can still have the "real" wedding next year as we planned (and yes, I mentioned this idea to him about two months ago and he thought it was silly). This would ensure him getting more BAH and separation pay, and me having less taken out of my paycheck for health insurance since I'd be on Tricare, and I'd also be his next of kin so if anything happened to him I'd be ok and first to know, etc. All those lovely military reasons. Anyway, my question is that I have heard some say that that ceremony down at the courthouse would be the "real" wedding and that next year would simply be a vow renewal and that people wouldn't want to go to that so why bother with a wedding ceremony and just have the reception, which I think is BS (I'm wearing that dress and walking down an aisle damn it!) Would it be so weird to do this or is is pretty common in military circles?

Also, what about the name change thing? I could only come up with including our first and middle names on the inside of the invite and calling it a marriage celebration rather than a wedding. Or would it be better to wait until later to change it?

He thought it'd be silly to exchange rings but I figure if we're married, why not wear rings? What about getting simple inexpensive bands and then upgrading next year at our "real" wedding? He doesn't seem to think a ceremony at the courthouse is even real but I beg to differ.

And another question - should we invite our parents since they both live fairly close? My mom loved the idea but seemed disappointed that it would be just him and me and some legal documents. I mean, it's legal and definitely makes us married... Is it a question of religion since it's not before God or something? Argh, I'm so confused!