The Differences in Sorority & Fraternity Rush: Why?

[peppermint23]

I recently read an interesting article by an MIT male who questioned the difference in recruitment processes.

He brought up an interesting point: Why the higher "parental" in involvement in sorority recruitment from Panhel than fraternities? What does it say about the way we view women versus men? Are women not capable of making rational, mostly unbiased decisions without a computerized algorithm process?

What do you think about this? I've always secretly longed to hold recruitment the way fraternities do, as though many girls would probably go to a few select houses over others, it would eliminate stress on both ends and the confusing "rush" feelings.

For instance, in my chapter we got more girls in the spring during informal recruitment because we were open, relaxed and girls really go to know US, not an edited-for-recruitment version of us.

[Psi U MC Vito]

Originally Posted by peppermint23

I recently read an interesting article by an MIT male who questioned the difference in recruitment processes.

He brought up an interesting point: Why the higher "parental" in involvement in sorority recruitment from Panhel than fraternities? What does it say about the way we view women versus men? Are women not capable of making rational, mostly unbiased decisions without a computerized algorithm process?

What do you think about this? I've always secretly longed to hold recruitment the way fraternities do, as though many girls would probably go to a few select houses over others, it would eliminate stress on both ends and the confusing "rush" feelings.

For instance, in my chapter we got more girls in the spring during informal recruitment because we were open, relaxed and girls really go to know US, not an edited-for-recruitment version of us.

What? Sorority recruitment was designed by a bunch of women, and it has been around since before the age of computers.

[33girl]

DGTITY????

Quite honestly, I think a lot of fraternities wouldn't mind a kickoff event where rushees visit each group at least once - I think a lot of guys' groups get dismissed without the rushee even thinking about them. However, at some schools the amount of fraternities is so ginormous that this just isn't possible.

If achieving quota and total were eradicated as a measure of "success" for sororities, I don't think anyone would have a problem having rush in the manner you suggest. However, that has to happen first, and the Devil will be learning to ice skate before that occurs. All the groups would lose too many chapters.

Also, I've said this before: on the whole, men believe they make the fraternity. Women believe the sorority makes them. Honestly, that is just a male/female thing and you can't rewire the human brain. Even if you go to MIT.

If you do better with spring rush, that's fine. If you "edit" yourselves and pretend you're something you're not for formal rush, then that's your choice. Your national is one of the most open and accepting of going outside the campus rush style, so quite frankly I don't know what the hell you're complaining about.

[AlphaFrog]

You brought up the analogy of parenting... Moms and Dads in general have very different parenting style. With multiple children, women try to strive for fairness between sibilings...men tend toward Occam's Razor (the simplest solution). So, if you have 10 cookies to divide among 4 siblings, a mom would most likely give each child two cookies, and then make sure the last two cookies were cut in perfect halves. Unless on child doesn't want 2.5 cookies and returns one whole one to the communal jar. Then the mother will attempt to redistribute it to the other children, either as one whole cookie if only one child wants another cookie, or divided evenly between the number of children who want more cookies. A dad will say "Hey y'all...I got some cookies...who wants some?" and leave it to the kids to duke it out over them. Same thing with rush. Only we don't cut our PNMs in pieces when we have an odd amount.

[LaneSig]

One negative aspect of fraternity recruitment: A guy will focus on one or two chapters that he doesn't stand a chance of getting. He doesn't get the polite hints and move on and give other chapters a chance. He ends up with no bid, wondering why the chapters "led him on".

[agzg]

Higher parental involvement is not indicative of the system being flawed or overbearing (in my mind) - it's indicative of some people's parents needing to mtob.

PLENTY of women have gone through formal, informal, COR, minimally and partially structured recruitment with absolutely no "help" from their parents beyond what would be given to the average fraternity man (mostly notice that they did or did not recieve a bid and to what chapter). On the other end, PLENTY of men have gone through fraternity recruitment with overbearing mothers/fathers.

[DubaiSis]

I think we all wish recruitment was less of a pressure cooker, but particularly on the 10+ chapter campuses, having a free-for-all recruitment would mean miniscule success rates and as 33 said, lots of chapter closures. RFM and MORE control seems to place more girls in more chapters than the free-and-loose alternatives. Maybe it's because it's primarily 18 year old girls who can't see the big picture beyond being "in the popular house" but that is just how it is. I for one have never been able to figure out an alternative way to send 1000 women through 15 sororities in 1 week and have 700 of those women actually find a home. What happens if the girls only go to the houses they want? 4 houses have 1000 girls fighting for them and 4 have ZERO women, and the ones in between would probably resort to any sort of dirty rush that will get girls in the door. And how could you blame them?

Let's keep it the way it is and wring our hands from stress year after year.

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by agzg

Higher parental involvement is not indicative of the system being flawed or overbearing (in my mind) - it's indicative of some people's parents needing to mtob.

PLENTY of women have gone through formal, informal, COR, minimally and partially structured recruitment with absolutely no "help" from their parents beyond what would be given to the average fraternity man (mostly notice that they did or did not recieve a bid and to what chapter). On the other end, PLENTY of men have gone through fraternity recruitment with overbearing mothers/fathers.

Psst...we're talking about NPC/NIC 'Parental Bodies" - not PNM's actual parents.

[DubaiSis]

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

Only we don't cut our PNMs in pieces when we have an odd amount.

Um, no sharing sorority secrets! HA!

[33girl]

Also, I can say FROM EXPERIENCE that the male style of rush is bad for women. On my campus, the (thankfully now ex) Greek advisor thought it was a fine idea for first semester freshmen women to go through a minimally structured rush. They went to a meet the Greeks in the gym from table to table for like 10 minutes, and I don't think they even HAD to visit each table - just where they wanted to go. There was no cutting, invites etc, just a week where sororities could hold parties (which frequently overlapped) and bids going out on a certain day. Now keep in mind this is at a school with a lot of first generation college students - it's not one of those places where women have been hearing about sorority involvement and seeing their moms go to alum meetings since birth. Most of the women had NO clue what rush was about. Well - the school now has two fewer chapters, and anti-Greek sentiment definitely is high.

Many women didn't get into the chapter they looked at, much in the same manner as LaneSig outlined. They don't take this as "the sisters of XYZ led me on and they suck," they take it as "all Greeks suck." These disappointed women don't look at other chapters, they say forget the whole system.

[Kevin]

If sororities thought that the fraternity-styled recruitment process would yield them more/better members and more stability over time, they'd adopt that style. Likewise for fraternities.

Our organizations have been around for a long, long time. They either know what works or they fold. If your organization can work within the rules its constrained by to reach a better result than everyone else, power to you. But your chapter's success doesn't indicate that everyone should work outside of the norm and expect the same result.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

Psst...we're talking about NPC/NIC 'Parental Bodies" - not PNM's actual parents.

Chalk it up to it being Monday and me being jealous of k_s with his glass of wine.

FWIW, I went through (dirty and disgusting and they should be ashamed) COR, only looked at one chapter, and never went to a meet the greeks event. My pledge class was actually quite large - as big or bigger than many that a group on my campus would get through formal recruitment. However, we had a lot of drops, as did a number of chapters on my campus.

Actually, I'd be interested in seeing the drop rates of campuses that do a more fraternity-style COR period in one semester versus the drop rates in pledge classes that go through formal recruitment in the other... not that there's a correlation but it might be interesting. That could totally be a pipe dream.

Plus, the variables (deferred? non-deferred?) are too many.

[ebdelt]

Originally Posted by LaneSig

One negative aspect of fraternity recruitment: A guy will focus on one or two chapters that he doesn't stand a chance of getting. He doesn't get the polite hints and move on and give other chapters a chance. He ends up with no bid, wondering why the chapters "led him on".

Very true!

And my school does have a formal tour of all the fraternity houses. That being said, half of them don't give a rat's ass about it and don't seriously consider talking to these guys in hopes of adding a few more to their pledge class. They usually have who they want from summer rush. Other fraternities act like they are really interested in guys during formal rush but end up only taking about anywhere from 1-5 through the formal process (again in addition to those they already have locked down through summer rush), and end up leaving a lot of guys feeling like they got ripped off and as LaneSig said "led on". It ends up that no one really likes formal rush, the rushees nor the actives, because it's not taken seriously and the whole process comes across as very fake by some fraternities. Still...it helps a select few find a house, so I guess it's not all bad.

What I've always wondered is why don't fraternities have a quota? They place a cap on how big a sorority gets but different fraternities can range from 15 members to 150 at the same school. I guess fraternities are more capitalistic and sororities are more egalitarian in that way then.

[Alumiyum]

I very much agree that the parenting issues are not the system's fault, but the fault of individual parents. I remember being a PNM and discussing parental involvement with the women in the group. Some were like me...my mother and other relatives coached me on what to say/not to say, helped me pick my wardrobe, etc. but did not hover (as in, it was made clear to me that it was my decision to join or not join...and I was educated enough on the process to understand that it is mutual selection and I may or may not receive a bid). Some had absolutely no prior knowledge of Greek life. And some had mothers who were calling them in between every party and pressuring them into joining a certain chapter. Keep in mind this is anecdotal, but those of us in group 1 or 2 seemed to fair better than those in group 3. They were in general far more nervous, and far more emotional when dropped. However they were also in the minority. Most of us had reasonable parental involvement or none at all. And from the many Greek men I know, there seemed to be very similar levels of involvement for them. Many with a reasonable amount or none at all and some with way too much.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

I very much agree that the parenting issues are not the system's fault, but the fault of individual parents. . . .

As noted above:

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

Psst...we're talking about NPC/NIC 'Parental Bodies" - not PNM's actual parents.