Depledging a "loser" sorority?

[PM_Mama00]

Wow. Everyone is being so nice. Hmm...

I'm sorry. You say you like these girls, but obviously if their "reputation" is enough to make you even THINK about depledging, then do it. These girls gave YOU the opportunity and chance when obviously none of the other orgs did. You should feel privileged. This organization deserves more than someone who's just worried about reputation. You obviously don't like these girls enough to look past what other people think of them.

When I was a new member, my chapter was at half total. We didn't really hang out with any fraternity guys except a select few "popular" girls. Our mixers sucked. I always wondered what was so great about the other sorority that made all the fraternity guys wana hang out with them but I didn't really care because I loved my sisters no matter what. Think about it. Do you think you could end up feeling like that? Do you think you could love your sisters and not care about guys and reputations? If not, then leave. Like I said, this organization deserves better.

And you know what? Two years later we doubled our numbers, were the biggest on campus (ok by like 2 or 3 members), were at total, and this year was the 3rd year in a row that we won Greek Week. If everyone cared so much about our reputation before, we wouldn't have built up to a champion sorority. We didn't do it for reputation.... we did it because it was fun, because for once we wanted bragging rights, and because it's just what happens to chapters all the time. A few years down, a few years up. I was on campus for 6 years and saw it with every sorority and fraternity.

I hope this helps.

[dixiephimu]

I love cherry vanilla Dr. Pepper from Sonic. Too bad NYC doesn't have one. (I have to drive all the way to Yonkers I think...bummer)

(grabs the one pound bucket of RAW chocolate chip cookie dough)

If you like the girls, then why not stay? If you don't want to be in the "loser" sorority, then run for office, get in a leadership position and start working hard to change it. My best friend rushed as a sophmore and didn't get in the "super duper best chapter ever" at her school. But she got to do all sorts of great things (rush chairman, etc) that she probably wouldn't have gotten to do if she joined one of the bigger sororities.

[preciousjeni]

Originally posted by dixiephimu
I love cherry vanilla Dr. Pepper from Sonic. Too bad NYC doesn't have one. (I have to drive all the way to Yonkers I think...bummer)

(grabs the one pound bucket of RAW chocolate chip cookie dough)

If you like the girls, then why not stay? If you don't want to be in the "loser" sorority, then run for office, get in a leadership position and start working hard to change it. My best friend rushed as a sophmore and didn't get in the "super duper best chapter ever" at her school. But she got to do all sorts of great things (rush chairman, etc) that she probably wouldn't have gotten to do if she joined one of the bigger sororities.

There's a Sonic in Yonkers????????????? And, I cosign on this advice even though I'm not NPC.

And, I do think all of you are being exceedingly nice, comparatively!

[Tex1899]

"Competitive" schools in Texas don't have quotas in the 30's.

If you truly go to a competitive school, don't depledge. Work to make your sorority better. And like others have said, membership is for life and there are probably 100,000+ other women across the country in the same sorority who are wonderful people.

My fraternity experience was great as an undergrad. It's even better as an alumnus. My guess is any Greek who's involved as an alum will tell you the same thing. Don't quit simply because your chapter is in the tank. These things tend to run in cycles.

[aephi alum]

Originally posted by preciousjeni
There's a Sonic in Yonkers?????????????

Never mind Yonkers - there's a Sonic in the Northeast???????????????

[TechAPhi]

Originally posted by Tex1899


If you truly go to a competitive school, don't depledge. Work to make your sorority better.

Well said.

Why not be the person who turns this group around?

[PhoenixAzul]

Also, think of it this way...people in other chapters and on campus are so insecure that they feel the need to comment on the weight and strength of a chapter that is not their own...is that something you would really want to be part of and waste your time on?

People talk shit on my chapter all the time because we are the smallest in members and in housing...but guess what? We are waaaaaaaaaay in the black, never been on probation for anything, have the highest GPA, almost won greek week (won lip sync, for the first time in our history!) and in general have a great time as sisters. My enjoyment of greek life comes from the crazy broads I have as sisters, and I have never ever been ashamed to wear my letters, on campus or off. And honestly, these girls cannot be *All* rotten apples. I think that the influence of other people may color judgement, to where you're only seeing the "bad" things that everyone else picks on. But think about the good things...Suzy is always there for a trip to the grocery story, Anne has great grades and is a great tutor, Amy will make a kick ass lawyer some day, etc. And the other stuff can change. Sometimes a positive outlook is all that is needed.

[KaiKey]

i have been on gc for quite some time but find myself getting shy about what i have said and then I delete my post. i am telling myself that "i will not be shy", "i will not be shy"! so, here i go.

i am sorry but you already have the wrong attitude for you, personally, and for your sorority. to start your post about pledging the "loser sorority" it is patently obvious that you have already made up your mind that you have "settled" for something lesser than who and what you are. with that attitude your sorority experience will never change but your attitude might change the experience of many other wonderful ladies who genuinely love their "loser sorority". do the sorority, their members and yourself a huge favor and depledge, immediately. you will always feel as though "you settled for less" and that sorority, their members and the entire greek system deserve better. perhaps with some maturity, after you have graduated from college and experienced life, you may want to consider ai (alumnae initiation). however, should you try the ai, please do not "settle" again.

good, better and best are only an impression and a state of mind. your mindset is not in the right place. depledge. you had already made up your mind and you made it up before you ever posted on greekchat. "loser sorority", how terribly sad for everyone involved.

oh, i almost forgot!! dr. pepper makes ~cherry vanilla dr. pepper~ in regular and diet, so you do not have go to the closest sonic (you will miss the crushed ice!!) - all you have to do is go to a store that carries it and buy yourself several 2 liter bottles of ~cherry vanilla dr. pepper~ and settle in for a lovely evening while we all share!! i am having diet ~cherry vanilla dr. pepper~ and trying to be good!! however, all of the "goodies" sound great!! i might drink two full bottles tonight!!

~kaikey~
a golden key unlocked my heart

[crunchies]

First off, the reuputation is NOT the only thing that matters to me. In fact, it didn't matter at ALL until some quitters brought to my attention that i'd be "paying to be associated wiht "losers."" (notice the quotes- not my words.) I have just been questioning being in the sorority because almost all the ohter pledges have quit, for one reason or anohter. And as I mentioned before, so far I haven't gotten to know the older members that well- they just haven't been very involved wiht the few pledges we have left. Maybe this will change after initiation- I don't know, having never been through something like this before. I DO like the girls I met during rush and thereafter, even though we havne't hung out that much, but since almost everyone else in my pledge class (including the girls I've gotten to know the best) has quit or is serioulsy considering it, I'm having doubts. Especially since there is money involved, for which I will have to find a job.

Thanks a lot for all the replies but try to keep an open mind. I can't be as loyal to my sorority as you all are to yours because so far it's been only a couple weeks, morale is low, and I barely know my sisters.

And this is University of Texas at Ausitn.

[Tippiechick]

Don't assume that we don't know what you're dealing with...

Consider yourself damn lucky that you did get a bid as a sophomore at UTA.

Stop complaining. Stop trying to justify calling your own sorority the "fat" sorority.

You need to decide if it's something you want to do. You seem to care VERY MUCH what other people think. Otherwise, you would not be ON A MESSAGE BOARD ASKING ADVICE ABOUT YOUR DECISION! It's time to start thinking for yourself. YOU NEED TO MAKE THIS DECISION.

Let me repeat what I said earlier. IF YOU ARE NOT 100% ABOUT YOUR DECISION THEN QUIT. NO ONE NEEDS SOMEONE IN THEIR OWN SORORITY DRAGGING THEM DOWN. I am sure they would be better off than to have one of their own LOOKING DOWN THEIR NOSE AT THEM. Make no mistake, that IS what you are doing.

And, don't come here asking advice if you only want people to kiss your ass and tell you that you should quit b/c you deserved to be first tier.

There was money involved when you accepted their bid! Don;t act like it's just a factor NOW.

I think it's really shitty that you have the nerve to tell us you can't be as loyal b/c it's only been a few weeks. Do you think that loyalty just happens naturally? Loyalty starts when you make a decision to stick with your sisters. That means that you stick with them IN GOOD TIMES AND IN BAD TIMES.

Suck it up and try to start acting like you have a brain of your own.

BTW, quota was NOT in the thirties for UTA.

Ok? Ok.

[AlphaSigOU]

When I pledged my fraternity (way back when dinosaurs roamed the earth) I was already 'damaged goods' - depledged another fraternity in fall rush. My chapter already had a reputation among the rest of OU's Greek community as being losers and 'apartment dwellers' (our house was built like an apartment complex, and to make up for the shortage of members, we rented out any vacant space to outsiders); few sororities mixed with us. (But hey, the outsiders usually had some primo weed! )

I don't regret my decision to pledge, and for the most part I got along well with my pledge brothers and the members, though there were times where I was about to throw in the towel and give up on Greek life altogether. I could give a rat's ass about belonging to the best house on campus; to use that often hackneyed term here on GC, 'I found my home'.

[dzandiloo]

oooh, I just discovered diet cherry 7-up. It's awesome! Does anyone have any molly mcbutter for the popcorn???

Oh, and not to be a nitpicker, but the University of Texas, which is located in Austin, is referred to as UT. UTA = University of Texas at Arlington....

[AlphaSigOU]

Originally posted by Tippiechick
Consider yourself damn lucky that you did get a bid as a sophomore at UTA.

Ahem... locally, it's just simply referred to as UT, UTA refers to the University of Texas at Arlington.

ETA: Never mind - dzandiloo beat me to the post! (And almost exactly the same verbiage!)

[BobbyTheDon]

you know. the fat girl sorority usually take in fat girls

Hey, I'm just tellin you the truth.


ETA: Hey Tippie. Reread that PM I sent you. And do what I told you to do in those other threads in here. You will get 50 bonus points.

[Tippiechick]

Originally posted by AlphaSigOU
Ahem... locally, it's just simply referred to as UT, UTA refers to the University of Texas at Arlington.

Well, I am from Tennessee. The only UT I acknowledge is ours in Knoxville.