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  #1  
Old 01-20-2010, 08:56 AM
DaemonSeid DaemonSeid is offline
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More Men are Marrying Wealthier Women

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/19/us/19marriage.html

January 19, 2010
More Men Marrying Wealthier Women
By SAM ROBERTS

Beagy Zielinski is a German-born 28-year-old stylist who moved to New York to study fashion in 1995 and stayed. Just before Christmas, she broke up with her blue-collar boyfriend, who repaired Navy ships.

“He was extremely insecure about my career and how successful I am,” Ms. Zielinski said.

An analysis of census data to be released Tuesday by the Pew Research Center found that she and countless women like her are victims of a role reversal that is profoundly affecting the pool of potential marriage partners.

“Men now are increasingly likely to marry wives with more education and income than they have, and the reverse is true for women,” said Paul Fucito, spokesman for the Pew Center. “In recent decades, with the rise of well-paid working wives, the economic gains of marriage have been a greater benefit for men.”

The analysis examines Americans 30 to 44 years old, the first generation in which more women than men have college degrees. Women’s earnings have been increasing faster than men’s since the 1970s.

“We’ve known for some time that men need marriage more than women from the standpoint of physical and mental well-being,” said Stephanie Coontz, a professor at Evergreen State College in Olympia, Wash., and research director for the Council on Contemporary Families, a research and advocacy group. “Now it is becoming increasingly important to their economic well-being as well.”

The education and income gap has grown even more in the latest recession, when men held about three in four of the jobs that were lost. The Census Bureau said Friday that among married couples with children, only the wife worked in 7 percent of the households last year, compared with 5 percent in 2007. The percentage rose to 12 percent from 9 percent for blacks, among whom the education and income gap by gender has typically been even greater.

“I’m not married, I would like to be married, and my friends are all in a similar situation,” said Dr. Rajalla Prewitt, a 38-year-old psychiatrist in New Jersey. “We’re having difficulty finding someone where there’s a meeting of the minds, where we can have the same goals and values.”

“Particularly, African-American men who are educated want a traditional home where they are the breadwinner,” said Dr. Prewitt, who is a black woman.

In 2007, the Pew report found, median household incomes of married men, married women and unmarried women were all about 60 percent higher than in 1970. But among unmarried men, median household income rose by only 16 percent. These days, men who marry typically gain another breadwinner.

In 1970, 28 percent of wives had husbands who were better educated, and 20 percent were married to men with less education. By 2007, the comparable figures were 19 percent and 28 percent. In 1970, 4 percent of husbands had wives who made more money; in 2007, 22 percent did.

College-educated wives are less likely to have a husband who is college-educated and in the highest income bracket than they were in 1970, and married women are less likely to have a husband who works.
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  #2  
Old 01-20-2010, 09:07 AM
DrPhil DrPhil is offline
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Cool.

ETA: The headline definitely shapes how you are willing and able to receive this story. The real story is that "women are marrying less educated and less well-off men." But, that's less positive than the current headline and it would cause sparks.

I want to remind women, particularly Black women, that something being "less likely" doesn't translate to it being "unlikely." Not everyone will get married and that includes those men and women who want to get married. And tons of people will settle. But, get over those sob stories and focus on YOU. YOU may have someone out there. If a college education and a certain class standing are AMONG the criteria for your mate, don't minimize your criteria just because you haven't found the person you're looking for YET.

Last edited by DrPhil; 01-20-2010 at 09:10 AM.
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  #3  
Old 01-20-2010, 10:15 AM
AOII Angel AOII Angel is offline
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I guess women are doing what men used to do...marrying their trophy husbands! I am one of the women in that group that makes more than my husband (an order of magnitude more!) but it's not due to education...he's getting his fellowship and I just did a residency. When he's done, though, he'll still only make a little less than half of what I do. Women have come a long way in earning potential from the times when we could be fired just for getting married. I think that was the point of this article.
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  #4  
Old 01-20-2010, 10:31 AM
DrPhil DrPhil is offline
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Originally Posted by AOII Angel View Post
Women have come a long way in earning potential from the times when we could be fired just for getting married. I think that was the point of this article.
Yes, if a within-gender analysis of getting fired just for getting married is the metric then women have definitely come a long way. I consider the real metric to be an across-gender analysis of how well our incomes and careers compare to men. In that regard, and in general, we have not come as far as we are led to believe. A household such as yours is the exception.

I completely see why you consider that to be the point of article. I saw a different point. So, it's definitely in the eye of the beholder which is perfect for the NY Times.
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  #5  
Old 01-20-2010, 10:34 AM
AOII Angel AOII Angel is offline
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Originally Posted by DrPhil View Post
Yes, if a within-gender analysis of getting fired just for getting married is the metric then women have definitely come a long way. I consider the real metric to be an across-gender analysis of how well our incomes and careers compare to men. In that regard, and in general, we have not come as far as we are led to believe. A household such as yours is the exception.

I completely see why you consider that to be the point of article. I saw a different point. So, it's definitely in the eye of the beholder which is perfect for the NY Times.
I agree that we still have a long way to go. Women still make $0.77 on the dollar of what men make for the same job, but just a short 40 years ago, women with law degrees were expected to work as secretaries.
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  #6  
Old 01-20-2010, 10:47 AM
DrPhil DrPhil is offline
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Precisely, Angel.

And today women with law degrees can still be found getting coffee and doing office assistant things for the men in law offices.

Awwwww, women are such nurturers. It's part of our DNA.
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  #7  
Old 01-20-2010, 03:28 PM
Munchkin03 Munchkin03 is offline
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Originally Posted by DrPhil View Post

I want to remind women, particularly Black women, that something being "less likely" doesn't translate to it being "unlikely." Not everyone will get married and that includes those men and women who want to get married. And tons of people will settle. But, get over those sob stories and focus on YOU. YOU may have someone out there. If a college education and a certain class standing are AMONG the criteria for your mate, don't minimize your criteria just because you haven't found the person you're looking for YET.
Thanks for posting this!

I am beyond tired of all the "Black women will never get married" articles. The NYT article really wasn't that way, so it was a refreshing change.

I'm okay with making more than my mate, but it has to depend on WHY I make more. He's a public interest lawyer? A schoolteacher? Okay, great! Unemployed? Working a low-wage, low-training job? No!
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  #8  
Old 01-20-2010, 04:25 PM
cheerfulgreek cheerfulgreek is offline
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Originally Posted by Munchkin03 View Post

I'm okay with making more than my mate, but it has to depend on WHY I make more. He's a public interest lawyer? A schoolteacher? Okay, great! Unemployed? Working a low-wage, low-training job? No!
lol lol lol
This made me laugh so freaking hard.
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  #9  
Old 01-21-2010, 12:16 AM
KSUViolet06 KSUViolet06 is offline
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Originally Posted by DrPhil View Post
Cool.

I want to remind women, particularly Black women, that something being "less likely" doesn't translate to it being "unlikely." Not everyone will get married and that includes those men and women who want to get married. And tons of people will settle. But, get over those sob stories and focus on YOU. YOU may have someone out there. If a college education and a certain class standing are AMONG the criteria for your mate, don't minimize your criteria just because you haven't found the person you're looking for YET.
Applause.
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  #10  
Old 01-24-2010, 12:21 AM
deepimpact2 deepimpact2 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DrPhil View Post
I want to remind women, particularly Black women, that something being "less likely" doesn't translate to it being "unlikely." Not everyone will get married and that includes those men and women who want to get married. And tons of people will settle. But, get over those sob stories and focus on YOU. YOU may have someone out there. If a college education and a certain class standing are AMONG the criteria for your mate, don't minimize your criteria just because you haven't found the person you're looking for YET.
Speak the truth on that one. . . especially on that part in bold. I hear so many Black women doing just that. They just give up hope and settle. Then they are unhappy with what they get. smh
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  #11  
Old 01-24-2010, 09:26 AM
DaemonSeid DaemonSeid is offline
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Originally Posted by Schmidtty View Post
Yeah, I would agree, but the thing about black chicks (in general), they don't really date outside of their race. Some do, but most don't. Most black dudes don't really have higher degrees or great jobs, at least not like black chicks do. So what happens is they either end up single or they settle. I think if more black chicks start dating outside of their race then they would have more and better options.
XITY
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  #12  
Old 01-24-2010, 05:50 PM
epchick epchick is offline
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Originally Posted by DaemonSeid View Post
XITY
Really what the eff people. Why is he banned AGAIN when he didn't do shit? That is pretty effing ridiculous. Some of you people really need to put your adult undies on and learn to deal with e-people who you don't agree with. Get over it. You might not like him, but not everyone likes you either.
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  #13  
Old 01-24-2010, 06:12 PM
Psi U MC Vito Psi U MC Vito is offline
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Originally Posted by epchick View Post
Really what the eff people. Why is he banned AGAIN when he didn't do shit? That is pretty effing ridiculous. Some of you people really need to put your adult undies on and learn to deal with e-people who you don't agree with. Get over it. You might not like him, but not everyone likes you either.
Seriously. I saw nothing really bad with his latest post. He learned his lesson about personal attacks the first time. Unless he reverts to old habits, we should let him return.

yet MM gets away with being blatantly bigoted yet that is ok. I don't get it GC.
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  #14  
Old 01-24-2010, 09:15 PM
DaemonSeid DaemonSeid is offline
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Originally Posted by epchick View Post
Really what the eff people. Why is he banned AGAIN when he didn't do shit? That is pretty effing ridiculous. Some of you people really need to put your adult undies on and learn to deal with e-people who you don't agree with. Get over it. You might not like him, but not everyone likes you either.
Im hoping this isn't directed at me...i didn't request him to be banned and could care less...and I also agree with Vito...I mean if you mods are going to do some speedy banning you need to do it across the board regardless.

I mean dayum MM will sit on a board and be disruptive for days but Xanthus breathes one word and POOF...

Equal Opportunity Bannings GC MODS!!
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  #15  
Old 01-25-2010, 12:46 AM
christiangirl christiangirl is offline
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Originally Posted by epchick View Post
Really what the eff people. Why is he banned AGAIN when he didn't do shit? That is pretty effing ridiculous. Some of you people really need to put your adult undies on and learn to deal with e-people who you don't agree with. Get over it. You might not like him, but not everyone likes you either.
THANK YOU. DS is right. People here say things that attack other users religions, races, and SES (which would get you fired or suspended IRL) yet they're still here. If they do get banned, they create 20 sockpuppets and each is just as vile as the last. Why is the user who comes back, apologizes for being offensive, and actually cleans it up the one who can't make one post without everyone getting their panties in a knot?
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