Wanted: Your Funniest Roommate Stories

[ZTAngel]

I figured that this topic would get a lot of answers. I just wanted to know what everyone's greatest roommate story is. Did you end up living with a complete nutcase like I did my freshman year? Post it here!
Luckily, I live with my friends this year so there hasn't been that many problems. Last year, when I was in the dorms, I played Russian Roulette with my roommate choice and ended up getting the oh-so-famous Roommate From Hell. You know...the kind who never takes out the trash, walks around naked, keeps weird hours, and says some of the most oddest things. The best example I have is this one night when I had a HUGE economics test early the next morning. She went out drinking and came home completely wasted at 4am. She brought home a bunch of guys she had met at the club to hang out in our room. They all get sick all over our floor and, since I was the only sober one, I had to clean it up. She then decided to streak the campus. She also use to leave me messages on our mirror with toothpaste. It would be like "Be home at 7". I never understood why she couldn't just use paper and pen like a normal person.
Ok, that's my story. I'm curious to hear what everyone else's stories are!

After college, I lived with three other girls. The first year was great so I signed for a second year- BIG MISTAKE. One of the girls was not only very wealthy but owned her own Christian Book Store. So, I come in one day and she is wearing my shirt. I commented on it and she denied it was my shirt. She was 4'9 and I am 5'9 - it was huge on her plus had a bleach stain on it so I knew it was mine. Next day- she has another one of my shirts on and still denied it was mine. So- I buy locks for my room. While she was at work- her laundry was by the machine and I looked at the shirt to just make triple sure it was mine. Get this-the psycho had ripped out the label and stitched in a new one with "size small" on it- The sewing job was so awful and obvious plus the shirt was a large! So- I moved out immediately. Later- met up with the other two roommates and they told me she had a history of stealing other people's stuff. It just showed me that even the rich and religous aren't perfect.

[juniorgrrl]

Where to begin...where to begin....

I've had a string of horrible roomates. The one I had first semester of Freshman year was MAKING drugs. She was trying to mix up morning glory seeds and paint thinner to create LSD I think. After I moved out of there, I was put in with a spoiled daddy's girl who insisted I was always annoying her by typing too loudly, etc, and who refused to let me bring a portable TV with headphones into the room. She said the light would distract her. After that, I moved home.

For the next year and a half, I had private rooms in the dorms, and it was great. This year, I moved into an on-campus apartment with 3 other girls. One of the girls, I've known forever and is great. The other two...are another story.

One girl (the main problem) refuses to do anything other than what she wants. She screams and complains how she always has to clean up and how messy we are, yet rarely cleans up her own messes. She smokes either in the apartment with the window open, or right outside the open front door, allowing all the smoke to come in. She had her boyfriend come and stay for about 4 days, and he spent most of the time sitting around with his shirt off in the living room. I was sitting in the living room, trying to study, and they just decided to move a party in there, no apologies, excuses or explanations. I had to leave the place to get any quiet. She also had a party the friday night before finals. All 5 times I asked her to please quiet down, she rudely said "yeah, fine, whatever" and turned the music down for 5 minutes and then it started back loud again. She also had a party in the middle of the week once, the night before I had a test. When at 2 am, I nicely asked her to either close her door or turn her music off, she said "go to bed, you're being rude, so I can be rude too. just shut up and go to bed." The best part of it all is that when our RA has spoken to her about this, she's come back and told me 1.) how childish it was to call him about it, 2.) how if I would have talked to her first it would have been worked out *yeah right* and 3.) that calling him is not going to make her do anything she doesn't want to do.

Wow...sorry this is so long...I guess I just have baaaaad luck with roomates.

[preppie]

Actually, I think that I'M the roomie from hell.....but given the chance to move out, my roomie said:"But I like living with you....you're so exciting!" Go figure!

One of my roommates was a complete moocher. Of course she didn't see it that way. She had brothers and sisters where I'm an only child. She accused me of being selfish and I said she was a thief and greedy. She didn't have a car either. I don't mind sharing or giving rides, but ask first! Don't ASSume that because you don't see me doing anything, means I'm your personal taxi.

What gets me is that I would have good snack food like chips, candy, etc. Her idea of snack food was offering me green beans or carrots? I'm thinking what the h*ll??

Needless to say we weren't roomies the next year, which was okay by me.

[alphabebe]

i lived in a suite with 5 people my freshman year and somehow luckily my roommate was awesome, the rest of my roomies well.....
this one girl was from a small town in upstate ny and i am fromn nyc. anyway, everytime i would get dressed she would make sacrcastic comments about why i was soooo dressed up. then the weekend would come and she would be soo nasty to me and everyone b/c she hated her outfit. i would offer her clothing , ect. even so she was still nasty. everyone hated her!! it wasn't long before all of her sarcastic comments stopped and she started to be my little clone. it was sick!! she's gone now and boy are we all happy!!!!

[lifesaver]

God i have like 12 of them.

When I lived in the chapter house I shared a room with Tyler. Great guy and would give you the shirt off his back. He was a year older than me and I was a freshman so I kinda looked up to him, well anyway I moved into the house in August and by December he had this girlfriend, nancy. She was a real sweetie and lived about 30 miles out of town. After they started going out I noticed he had quit using deoderant. Noticably so. I enquired and he calimed to be using it still. Well Nancy began crashing in our room at the house becaus eshe hated the drive. It was then that I noticed tyler's bo was really bad in the mornings when we'd all wake up. This went on for a few days and then one morning about 3 Am I rolled over to see them screwing in front of me all porn star style. anyway, I put two and two together and came to figure out it was Nancy that was smelling, and it wasn't BO. This was some unholy funk. it permiated everything. The stench would linger in the room for 48 hours after. It would be in the shower after she was there. You could tell where she had been in the house by how it smelled. Glade wouldn't eve phase her stank. I am not making this up, but the only odor suppressant that would work was Raid. Fortunately thay broke up two months later but it was a rough two months. Alls I can say is that it musta been some good stuff to endure that odor.

I have tons more stories, some clean, some not so clean I'll post when I have a chance. I am on a deadline at work today. coming tomorrow... Bloody Palms!!!

[AXO Alum]

Lifesaver - okay - GROSS! I would've never made it for 2 months with that - YUCK!

I was a junior when I transferred in, so I was supposed to be rooming with a high school buddy of mine - well she never showed. So I end up with this girl who was a freaking fruitcake! She broke my TV, fan, etc. When I would come in late from studying she or one of her friends would be asleep in my bed. One night I awoke to all this chatter and I looked down off my bunk, and see her and about 5 guys snorting coke right there in the room with me -- I totally freaked out on her (I have never done illegal drugs including "just pot" so I certainly don't want to be busted for these idiots) -- needless to say she started talking trash about me but I don't care - she ended up flunking right out of school (*yea*)! I then finally got to move to the dorm I wanted. I had a roommate who was an AX so that worked out pretty okay (I still hadn't pledged yet) - halfway through that semester a room opened so I had a private room (the best!). The fall (when I pledged) I got another whacko - she was totally into the Grateful Dead, black satin sheets, candles everywhere, and just plain weird. I would get up and leave in the middle of the night because I'd hear her and her man of the hour having sex (okay - gross). I finally got rid of her (she flunked out too) and got my private room back. Of course by then I had new roomies (my now husband and gang) so I always stayed with the 6 of them anyway - it was much warmer in their dorm because it faced the sun. Guys are SO MUCH better to live with - if they piss you off, you just say "screw you" and they say "screw you too" and its over -- girls hold grudges and all that crap -- can't deal with that!

My mother used to call me to wake me up for my 8 o'clock -- I still don't know how she found out I was missing that class more often than not -- and she'd call to the guys room, and since we'd all be watching a movie and fall asleep wherever we were laying, she'd have to hear each one of them before the phone would reach me -- I think she really wondered about my lifestyle Of course it was all completely innocent Ahhh - those were the good 'ol days!

------------------
"Alpha Chi Omega - If you only had 2 wishes, what would your second one be?"

[AlphaChiGirl]

Gosh, my last year roommate was a freak and an idiot (but I was probably the roommate from hell). Instead of telling me what was wrong, she'd leave me notes...while I was in the room! She never took out the trash, left meat in the fridge over Christmas (a month long holiday), so I returned to the stench of rotting meat. Her side of the room was so bad, but she didn't seem to notice, 'cause she studied 110% of the time, and criticized me for managing my time a litte more wisely than she did. She accused me of being spoiled. One of my friends was in the room while she was talking with family from home...talking (in Chinese) about how her roommate was a rich spoiled whore. Little did she know, my friend knew Chinese and told her off! You never know who knows Chinese!

Needless to say, I'm in a single now. I don't plan on sharing a room with anyone (maybe a suite or house) until I'm married or cohabitating.

[AKA2D '91]

OH MY GOODNESS, where should I start, or which one? There were 2 (different semesters) who were from hell, then there was this one who was strange!

Okay, #1

This thing was so dirty, junkie, nasty, it was horrible. I mean, I don't always make up my bed, but this chick never did, I don't think she EVER in that one semester change her sheets!
The girl would eat and NOT wash her containers! She was just ALL around dirty. When the dorm mother came in for inspection, which was EVERY Thursday, do you think she had the nerve to try to clean...heck no! It was ridiculous...one side clean and the other side all messed up. Then the girl, did not go to class. Everytime I got up, she was asleep, when I came in, she was asleep. But she did love to hang on the phone. Mind you, I had just crossed the semester before. So my Big Sisters wanted to see us. I would see my LS and they were like why didn't you come to this and that....Do you know that heffa was not giving me my messages? My big sisters were leaving messages ON MY MACHINE and the so and so had NOT GIVEN THEM TO ME!
I HAD TO TELL THE DORM MOTHER TO GET ME OUT OF THERE CAUSE I WAS GONNA HAVE TO HURT HER!

I was so glad I had a car, I didn't know what to do!

#2
This girl was a freshman. She was many miles from home. Since I had a car and all, I would take her to the store, etc. Mind you, this girl didn't come to school with alot. Later, this girl gets with some of her friends and she did something that pissed me off! Anyway, I did not allow her to use any of my stuff...my phone, stereo, iron, tv, answering machine, etc. If she had to go some where I didnot take her! She had to get there the best way she could. I LOCKED ALL MY STUFF IN MY LOCKER!

AFTER THAT, I MOVED OFF CAMPUS. I WAS TOO OLD (20) TO BE LIVING WITH THOSE TRIFLING FOLKS!

ALL IN ALL, I DID ENJOY MY DORM EXPERIENCE...I WOULD RECOMMEND IT TO ANYONE, TAKE AWAY THOSE ROOMIES...BUT THAT'S PART OF LIFE!

[juniorgrrl]

Originally posted by AlphaChiGirl:
Gosh, my last year roommate was a freak and an idiot (but I was probably the roommate from hell). Instead of telling me what was wrong, she'd leave me notes...while I was in the room! She never took out the trash, left meat in the fridge over Christmas (a month long holiday), so I returned to the stench of rotting meat. Her side of the room was so bad, but she didn't seem to notice, 'cause she studied 110% of the time, and criticized me for managing my time a litte more wisely than she did. She accused me of being spoiled. One of my friends was in the room while she was talking with family from home...talking (in Chinese) about how her roommate was a rich spoiled whore. Little did she know, my friend knew Chinese and told her off! You never know who knows Chinese!

Needless to say, I'm in a single now. I don't plan on sharing a room with anyone (maybe a suite or house) until I'm married or cohabitating.

Hehe, when I left for Christmas, there were dishes and jambalaya in the sink. Not mine, of course...its property of the evil ones...

And speaking of bilingual roomates, one of mine is Nicaraguan, and loves to talk in Spanish in front of me. She thinks its funny to say my name so I'll know she's talking about me and then insult me in Spanish...please...if you're going to have the gall to insult me, at least be brave about it and let me know what you're saying!

[SigTauJake]

The fall semester of my Junior year had to be the worst 4 months of my entire college career. I had no where to live, so I signed up to leave with three guys I didn't know, thinking I could endure four months of it. Well I moved in and it only went from bad to worse. First off, most of my freinds were greek at the time. Two of the roommates had handed in their letters from one of our fraternity's and had gotten them in a lot of trouble. So you couldn't be seen with either of them on campus without risking your life. Then my other roommate would study at the kitchen table with those huge airplane headphones on. He said he couldn't stand the noise of our apartment. He would be completely alone and still have them on. Then he started to sleep with them on. He would also go to bed at 8 p.m. every night and bitch if we were loud. Finally, we started to get "attacked" by brothers from all the houses on campus because the two who quit would pick fights with all fraternity people. I couldn't have friends over without anti-Greek insults being tossed around. To make a bad time worse, the one gained 40+ pounds in one semester because all he did was watch tv and look up porn on his computer. I had no problem keeping my friends away after they saw him. The other started having panic attacks. His mother, his uncle, state troopers, and the paramedics were at my apartment almost everyday. In the end I think all three dropped out of college. It was just the most chaotic semester of my life. To say the least I rarely spent any time there...

[carnation]

To quote someone else on this thread: where to begin?

Because I went straight through 9 years of school to get a bachelor's, master's, and doctorate, I had a lot of roommates. Some were great...but did I ever have some nominees for Roommate From Hell. My first one ever spent hours spying on the SAE House with binoculars and making obscene phone calls to guys. Then I had the coke seller, the one who brought sailors into her room at the apt. for one-night-stands, the one who baked elaborately for herself but wouldn't wash the pans, the 2 who would bring guys into our apt. bedroom at 3 AM and turn on the stereo(to heck with the fact that 2 of us were already asleep in there!)--oh wow, are the memories coming back.

And yesterday my college freshman daughter, a strong Christian, told me she's afraid that her new roommate is going to be this loon who is into strange religious practices and whose boyfriend never leaves when the girl does. This is why her (the loon's) last roommate got rid of her. I feel so strongly for my daughter, having to watch her start to go through the same crap that I (heck, most college students) did.

[This message has been edited by carnation (edited January 29, 2001).]

[bucutie02]

well when i was in the dorms, i lived with my best friend so that wasnt really a problem. The only thing that would bug me sometimes would be that when we would go to bed, she would still be online talking to her boyfriend and the typing would drive me nuts. Our neighbors were a different story! The ones that lived across the hall from us would have their door open 24/7...thats a common thing, i know- but when you come back from the shower, have a little dignity for everyone else and shut the door while you get dressed!! The ones that were caddy corner from us had one girl that would play the guitar ALL day- morning noon and night! The ones to our left would always be extremely LOUD at like 3am!! We both had 8am classes so we needed our sleep. Asking them to quiet down didnt work, so finally my roommate would bang on the wall.... as time went on, they would bang back!! We then later got used to going to bed around 3,4am unfortunately and waking up around 7am for our classes and then in the afternoon we would take about a 3-4 hour nap. Then there were the ones on the right of us... to make a long story short... my roommate had gone to class leaving the door unlocked but closed while i was taking a nap. My neighbor knocks on the door.. but since i was trying to take a nap i didnt answer. Well she OPENS the door, walks in and leaves. I wasnt all the way asleep so i heard her walk in. Why didnt i look up the first time? i dont know! but anyway, she did this two more times! she would leave, come back and walk in. The third time she did this i heard like keys rattling, so then i pop my head up...turns out she had gone back to her room to get a jacket so she would get in my purse and steal my money. My wallet had a set of key rings hooked on to it and they were sitting on top of my purse which was VERY visible. When she saw me look up she jumped and was like "uh, umm... i just wanted to see if you had the biology notes that i missed today!!" HELLO, my notes wouldnt be in my purse!!! so needless to say, we kept our door closed and locked at all times after that! After that semester she was kicked out of school for more reasons that one. I had like around 80 dollars in my wallet but she didnt take it. I looked up as she was about to though!! Now I am living at home, so i dont have any stories to share.

------------------
"He is not perfect, you are not perfect. The question is whether or not you are perfect for each other"

[This message has been edited by bucutie02 (edited January 07, 2001).]

[preppie]

Wow! Bucutie, how come you just didn't live at home the whole time!?