Wedding Votes

[Jen]

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[tcsparky]

Hey BrooklineU,

Love your stories, always go straight there when its time for a new one.

Is this question personal, or are you considering a wedding for the story?

Tasteful, simple decorations, I think, are better than a lot of expensive, over-the-top stuff that no one will care about anyway. My sister had a lot of plain white & gold decorations, with pink flowers, then several nice areas set up for photo-ops. It seemed that everyone had a good time, and the pictures in her album are simply awesome. (Considering the amount of alcohol consumed at that reception, some people only remember it by the pictures anyway.)

[This message has been edited by tcsparky (edited April 21, 2001).]

[KillarneyRose]

The quality of the food is definitely something people will remember. A good way to save money at a wedding is to have a buffet as opposed to a sitdown dinner. We had a wonderful buffet with a roast beef and ham carving station, hot and cold side dishes and rolls for the same amount a "rubber chicken" sitdown dinner would cost.

~ Tracy

[Hootie]

I LOVE THIS TOPIC. Someday I'd like to own my own business and be a wedding consultant.

Here are just a few ideas on ways to save money...
Invitations
One of my sorority sisters did her own invitations. She bought some of that see-through paper and a solid print paper to go behind. She then put the two together and paper hole punched them and tied a simple ribbon to attatch the pieces together. It was SO super classy looking yet saved her a lot of money.
Gifts...not yours though
I have heard that a lot of people find themselves thinking they need to buy EVERYONE and their mother a gift for being in their wedding. Not true. My cousin's wife did a nice job of presenting gifts to us for being in her wedding. I did not expect anything as I was just the lector. However she presented me with a simple candle and candle holder. The candle was the same color that she used for her wedding too, so it tied in beautifully. Perfect gift but not a fortune. You get the point.
Beverages
I've heard different views on alcoholic beverages at the reception. I know of couples who have paid a fortune because of an open bar and others who haven't. Personally I like what my cousin and his wife did. My aunt and uncle paid for a certain amount of drinks. Because they knew who all was attending the reception after the RSVP, they handed out 'drink tickets' which allowed so many beverages. The bar at the reception understood the rules and was great about their approach. After your tickets were gone it was up to you to buy the rest of your drinks. I think it worked great.

Things NOT to skimp on
I agree with all of the above. Your guest's happiness will make or break your wedding. I agree that food is important but NOT as important as the music and the photographer. Personally I put the photographer ABOVE all. This is the person who will capture your memories, who will be working with you personally to make sure everything looks right, etc. I've heard horror stories of couples that had terrible pictures and had to redue their wedding day. Now who wants stress and tears like that.

Well best of luck and I'll post more if I hear other great ideas.
Good luck,
Hootie


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What do you get when you cross and Alpha Omicron Pi and a Sigma Phi Epsilon? A beautiful Chi Omega!!!
http://www.unomaha.edu/~comega

[33girl]

You can skimp a LOT on flowers and decorations. When my little got married, she made our bridesmaid dresses (she sews) and the table decorations were lengths of lace - left over from the dresses.

Do not EVER, EVER, EVER skimp on the music. I am still recovering from the wedding where the main artists were Air Supply and Bread. If you have to be a Nazi about it and remove things from the DJ's collection, do it. He's there to serve you, not play his favorites.

Also, a lot of good cheap food is better than something like Cornish game hen where you have to scrimp & save to get enough for everyone.

[CutiePie2000]

Never ever skimp on the photographer!

[juniorgrrl]

Down here, a buffet is a standard thing is a wedding. I don't think I've ever been to a sit-down dinner.

Professional invitations shouldn't be too expensive if you get something simple. Sometimes you have to stop and think "20 years from now, will I like all this foil and pearlized embossing as a memento of my wedding?" Plain engraved invitations on ecru card stock are beautiful and classy in a simple way.

I've never heard of having bar tickets at a wedding. Down here its either open bar or nothing at all. I can just imagine what people would say if they saw tickets. I guess its the whole Southern hospitality thing - better for you to put out a bit more and make sure your guests feel totally welcome.

Don't skimp on a photographer, but make sure you find one who won't monopolize your day! I hate it when the wedding party is absent for half of the wedding for pictures. There are only so many poses people can assume. I'm going to do as many of my pictures before the wedding so I can enjoy the reception.

Instead of spending money on wedding programs, why not just do an old-fashioned recieving line? It makes your guests feel welcome at the reception, and it gives you the opportunity to personally thank them for coming.

And on that note...THANK YOU NOTES are *vital* It is so tacky to give a bride something and not recieve a thank you note. Make sure to get some little engraved notecards with your name "Mrs. John Smith" on them and keep a detailed list of what people give you so you can promptly thank them.

[imsohappythatiama]

From the girl who is currently in the middle of major wedding plans....and the girl whose mom is a wedding planner......

DON'T skimp on the food, obviously. Guests are very important, and no matter what kind of food you serve, it should be super yummy. If you can't afford a dinner buffet or sit-down formal dinner for your reception, then consider a luncheon buffet, formal seated luncheon, or brunch reception. One of the nicest and most elegant receptions I even attended was an evening buffet of "heavy hors d'oeuvres"--a definite way to save on the price of food (plus, guests love trying all of the different finger foods, etc).

Be careful when ordering the cake.... They can get expensive fast, especially if you want the hard fondant icing, and ESPECIALLY if you have more than 100 guests. A way to "skimp" on this is to order a small version of your dream cake, and have the caterer make a large sheet cake in the back. You and your new husband can cut the pretty cake, and your guests can have the sheet cake cut in the kitchen, and no one will be the wiser.

Flowers...I hate to disagree with my fellow GCers, but DO NOT skimp on the flowers. Be economical, but do not skimp. Select flowers which will be in season when you get married (i.e., don't pick tulips for a July wedding). Ask your florist if he/she will be on hand the day of the wedding to take the flowers from the ceremony and transport them to the reception--you can use altar urns as place-card table urns, etc.

Invitiations. BE CAREFUL! They are soooooo expensive. Engraved used to be the rule, but with the advent of Thermography (looks just as nice and is SO MUCH cheaper), Thermography is your best bet for saving money. Go plain, classic, and thermographed, and you can't go wrong.

Wedding Dres... Ugh. Don't get me started. It is great if you have a desinger wedding outlet like we do here in Boston....awesome designer dresses for crazy prices. (Not that I could find one I liked, mind you, but I saw TONS of women trying on beautiful, couture dresses for 75% of the salon prices!!!!) DO skimp on the shoes--make sure they're comfy, cute, etc, but let me tell you ladies, no one is going to see your shoes except you.

Bridesmaids dresses. What a nightmare. You can get a really good deal if all of your BM's buy at the same salon--for example, all 6 of mine did this, and instead of paying $210 per dress, they ended up getting "volume discount" and only had to pay $176 per dress.

DON'T skimp on the music. No way. I prefer a band, some prefer a DJ....whatever you like, get the best! And don't be afraid to be specific about what you want/don't want played!!!!

The photographer is key....just make sure your vision for your photos is the same as the photog's vision.... and see if you can buy the negatives--that will save a ton in reprint charges when Auntie Elma from Montana wants to order an extra print.....

Good luck! Hope this is helpful!!!!

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Oh, Kappa Kappa Kappa Gamma,
I'm so happy that I am a
Kappa Kappa Kappa Gamma,
Nobody knows . . . how
happy I am!

[dc1]

Here is a quick tip on Flowers and table decorations and how to make cheap look chic (I sound like a craft show, huh?)

Flowers for pews:
Choose an inexpensive white medium like Baby's Breath. Then add 3 bold colored flowers (i.e. deep red roses) to each arraingment (always 3, as it's asymmetry adds body and drama). Finish off with a little green for background and some mixed in the white...

For larger flower arraingments:
Choose an inexpensive white medium, a few bunches of bold color (bunches always 3) and then top off with some scattered "middle" flowers (i.e. irises, tulips, lilies.. just nothing to outshine the bold color) Again, use green as background and mixed in with the white medium and bold colored flowers. Always remember to have height to your arraingments.

Centerpieces - the medium flowers can be used for centerpieces - small fish bowls with a beautiful beta fish. Add some (very little) baby's breath, 3 lillies (or whaterver you choose) and a couple of sticks (like bamboo or thinner) to give the arraingment height. A little bit of green, and your done. Using the medium flowers will not only save you money, but won't "overcrowd" the tables. They are inexpensive, creative, and memorable.

I guess ya'll are wondering how I know this stuff, huh? I watch all those art/craft/design shows... I know, I'm a looser.

[dc1]

Originally posted by brooklineu:
Hey, I watch all those design shows too! I even copy down the good ideas to practice in the future lol. I'm so addicted it's sick lol.

LOL! All about the Christopher Lowell... UPLIGHT UPLIGHT UPLIGHT.. hee hee!

[veruca76]

Originally posted by brooklineu:
Hey, I watch all those design shows too! I even copy down the good ideas to practice in the future lol. I'm so addicted it's sick lol.

Have you guys seen that show "A Wedding Story." It's on The Learning Channel every day at 11a.m. They follow a real couple around and find out how they met, how they're doing the wedding, etc. They also collect cuter moments from the rehersal dinner, day before prepararation and the real thing. It's really neat. A friend got me hooked on it.

[bucutie02]

Originally posted by veruca76:
Have you guys seen that show "A Wedding Story."

I am very into weddings so i love that show. I also am an addict to A Dating Story and A Makeover Story. A Baby Story is my least favorite- mainly because its always on when i am eating lunch!

[valkyrie]

Originally posted by SHEETCAKE
People know when they are eating the SHEETCAKE.

But what if it's a really cool SHEETCAKE?

[FAB*SpiceySpice]

Originally posted by valkyrie
But what if it's a really cool SHEETCAKE?

YUM, I can't wait for the sheetcake at my wedding.

It's going to be in the shape of a pumpkin, b/c my wedding will be on Halloween, how cool is that?

[dzsaigirl]

I got married almost 2 years ago. Looking back, I would do some things the same, but do other things differently.

Things to spend money on:

Photographer (seriously the most expensive thing for mine)
Honeymoon (my honeymoon is my best memory, not the wedding! )
Food
Transportation

Things that you can go cheaper on:

Dress and alterations (especially if you know someone)
Decorations
Gifts
FLOWERS (If I had only known!)
THE AMOUNT OF FRIGGIN' GUESTS!
The time of day = the cost of venue (I had a Saturday early afternoon wedding, which makes for cheaper rental and a lighter menu)
If need be, skip the alcohol. I had an open soda/coffee/tea/beer/wine/champagne bar and it was worth it, but not exactly necessary (expensive)

Looking back, I would have had a destination wedding or a cruise wedding with WAY FEWER PEOPLE. I felt all obligated and stuff to invite people and I should have just invited family and close friends. I feel like I had NO TIME to talk to anyone or acknowledge their presence properly. I would have liked it to be more intimate.