Is there something wrong with me?

bucutie02 · #1 02-26-2001, 11:09 PM

Okay well this is something that i think about all the time. When i went off to college my freshman year, i went to a private university about two and a half hours from home. When i got there my parents helped me move in and then my dad and my brother went home. My mom and my best friend's mom (my roomie) decided to stay one more day with us. So that very next day, i cried ALL during breakfast because i was so sad and scared about the entire college process. Just a little known fact, the summer before i began college, there were many nights when i would cry myself to sleep because i didnt want to leave home. I am not sure what i was thinking when i applied to Baylor, knowing i would have to move out. ANYWAYS, we came home about every weekend that semester. During the week i would be fine, but every Sunday when it was time to go back to Waco i would cry. It wouldnt be as bad all the time, but still. When the second semester came around, we would stay like maybe three weeks at a time before coming home for a weekend. I was really proud to be going to Baylor since it is a prestigious school, but i wasnt having any fun. I didnt have a car then so we could never just go to wal-mart or anything, and plus i felt like i didnt fit in with the people there. I mean, i did have new friends and they were great, but overall i just felt like the people there were way too stuck up and all they cared about was money! I wasnt brought up that way, so therefore i didnt feel comfortable. Now, this year i transferred to a school here in Houston. My parents mentioned the fact about living in a dorm since i wouldnt have to deal with driving in traffic, but i decided to live at home. I dont really mind the traffic all that much since i rarely hit rush hour. I enjoy going to school here since every one seems a lot more down to earth than at baylor. Sometimes however, i feel like i am missing out on the whole college experience. I basically go to school and come back home. A part of me wishes i would have stayed at baylor and another part of me is glad im going to school here. I guess what I am trying to say is that i am not very independent, and get homesick very easily. I like living at home with my parents. I remember when i was back in high school and all my friends were ready to leave home and go off to college. Maybe that was something that influenced me in applying to Baylor. My parents would always tell me to stay here and go to the school i am presently attending. I never listened to them, and was just excited to be going to baylor.

Okay well i guess all of you are desperately waiting for me to ask whatever it is that I am asking. I just wanted to know if anyone is or was like me, and how you got over your fear of "leaving the nest". Sometimes i feel like this isnt normal and that someone at my age should be a lot more independent and wanting to "grow up" i guess you can say.

Allie_XO · #2 02-27-2001, 12:59 AM

I can't really identify with everything you are going through. I am 4 hours away from my "home," and I hardly ever go back. My family knew that when I moved here, I was moving here. I couldn't wait to move out - I've always been super independant.

However, I do know what it is like to move out under difficult circumstances. When I was seventeen I was having some home trouble and decided to move in with my aunt for the summer and work. The only thing that I can say is take things at your own pace. Don't do anything that you don't feel comfortable with.

If you feel like you are missing the college experienc, just make sure that you call anybody that you know and make sure that you try to get with them. Make sure that if there are any special activities that you go to them. Also, introduce yourself to people in your classes. College is just what you make it. Have fun and I'm glad that you are happier now!

Allie

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Some of my collegues think that the chemicals we are experimenting with cause brain damage, however I think that fish crunchy bits of salami my new red hippie noodle. Naked pool frogs?

juniorgrrl · #3 02-27-2001, 01:33 AM

Your story sounds a lot like mine, bucutie. I started at Tulane my frosh year, which is a prestigious private school, that was an hour from home. I went home every weekend and got sick to my stomach every Sunday afternoon. I talked to my mom on the phone for over an hour every night. I had friends that were nice, but I just didn't feel like I belonged. My boyfriend and all my high school friends were at LSU. I finally decided to transfer for the second semester of my freshman year. I cried when my mom left the dorm. I was scared and homesick. I went home pretty often.

But very slowly, I became more and more independent. I joined organizations on campus and had weekend activities at school and had reasons to stay. Gradually, I became more independent.

Are there any on campus apartments or nice upperclass dorms at your school you could live in? It might help to move there as an 'in-between', knowing your parents are just a phone call away.

I understand where you're coming from. I was never ready to leave the nest. I was a national merit finalist, which could have gotten me full scholarships to many schools, but I refused to go because I was scared to leave. Even still, I don't want to work or live far from my family. But, gradually, you come to see that space is nice. Not having your parents around all the time is fun - its so cool to just go out at 2 am like its no big deal.

I guess my point is - take things at your own pace. Get involved on campus and you'll feel like a part of things. It will all fall into place sooner or later. But you're not wierd and you're not alone in not being ready to leave home for good at 18

soror6 · #4 02-27-2001, 03:52 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Allie_XO:
Some of my collegues think that the chemicals we are experimenting with cause brain damage, however I think that fish crunchy bits of salami my new red hippie noodle. Naked pool frogs?

****with tears in my eyes******** Now since it is 2 am, that is even funnier than it would be if I read it at noon! Truly Truly ROTFLMAO

[This message has been edited by soror6 (edited February 27, 2001).]