Difficult Sister

[bubblegum]

Hi, I'm new to GreekChat.com. We have a bit of a dilemma at my sorority. I don't know what to do about it. I care a lot about my sorority. I think it's a wonderful organization, and I've put so much time and hard work into it that it makes me so sad to see problems.

The biggest problem right now is that some of the girls that just crossed are totally power-tripping. One girl in particular is the worst. She is ALWAYS yelling at the nm's and she's totally insensitive to the fact that they have their own lives and they have tons of work to do. This girl has a REALLY, REALLY bad temper. She can dish it out, but she can't take it. If anyone even tries to give her constructive criticism, she takes it so personally and takes it as an attack on her.

And it totally doesn't help that our president is similar. She's not as bad-tempered, but pretty close. A lot of us don't agree with the way this girl and the president are treating the nm's, but we don't know the way to address this without them feeling like this is an attack on them and getting all defensive.

Our house is already so divided, and we're so scared of making things worse. There is so much division and resentment and drama that most of the nm's wanted to drop, because they said our sorority looked unorganized and in turmoil. It took a lot to convince the nm's that our organization is well worth it and that they should stay. They also expressed concern that our newly crossed girls would be taking over soon (because most of us are graduating soon) and that our newly crossed girls are very immature and unready to take on all the responsibilities of the sorority. The nm's are really concerned about whether or not this girl in particular will not give them respect and will be difficult to work with even after they cross.

I really don't know what to do. I know we should just talk about it, but she never listens. She just gets defensive. Other than forcing her to take some sensitivity classes and some anger management classes, what can we do? Has anyone else ever had to deal with someone in their organization like this? How do you handle it? How do you make someone like that understand that being mean isn't the way to get nm's to become strong sisters and strong leaders? How do you make someone like that understand that it's unreasonable and unfair to get mad at nm's if they won't meet with you because it's the night before an exam and they're studying?

I'm so fed up and frustrated that I wish I could just walk away from it all...just disaffiliate. But I've worked so hard, and the past four semesters have been amazing. It's just this semester that sucks. We've just had so many girls graduate in the past couple of semesters that the whole dynamic of our sorority has changed, and it's changed for the worse. I'm graduating next semester, and I don't want to graduate with my sorority in turmoil and I don't want to graduate with all these bad feelings.