Question about current relationship situation and rushing/pledging affect. (Serious)

[MrBigMuscles]

Question about relationships and rushing and will this affect me (serious)

Hey everyone, this is a serious question which is why I came here. I am a freshman at a fairly academic focused university where Greek life is a big part of the social scene (since it’s the only way to have a social life here) I rushed this fall but spread myself too thin and didn’t end up getting a bid. Still, I had a great experience meeting people and a lot of brothers liked me and I plan to rush again in the spring, a few of my friends who joined houses this semester are hoping to see me again and I will join their house.

One thing I’ve been thinking about before spring rush is how my relationship might be viewed. I’m 19 and my girlfriend is 17- She’s in high school, but only two years younger than me and we’ve been dating for 1.5 years She was held back as a kid in elementary due to a speech impediment, so she’s listed as a sophomore even though she’s the age of a junior and is supposed to be a junior. (Basically when she’s a senior she’ll be older than all of them)

The age gap itself is normal, but I’m wondering if guys in the fraternity might think it’s weird just because she’s still in high school. I’ve heard of plenty of people dating someone younger when they first start college, but I don’t know how that’s usually perceived in Greek life. Do fraternities ever care about stuff like that, or is it generally seen as no big deal? This is due to the possibility during pledgeship (since I will eventually live with them and be brothers) where they may dig deeper, ask about if I’m in a relationship, who it is, does she go here, will she be coming to an event, etc- And they may find that grade part odd despite the context and normal gap of being held back.

I’m not worried about hiding anything, I don’t find it an issue and many people do not care, I just don’t want to seem out of touch socially or have people misinterpret the situation and it may effect me getting into a fraternity, etc.

Thank you.

TLDR; I’m a 19-year-old freshman planning to rush again in spring. My girlfriend is 17 and still in high school (was held back as a kid, she’s supposed to be a JR but this caused her to be a sophomore, despite being older than them), and I’m wondering if that might come off as weird to fraternity guys or if most people wouldn’t care. This is incase they ask and stuff during rush/pledgeship.

[33girl]

You're putting the cart before the horse.

Wait and see how the relationship goes.

Then again, if you're thinking of breaking up because it might affect your rush prospects, you should probably do her a favor and end it.

[AnchorAlumna]

That's not at all an unusual situation. my husband had a fraternity brother who was dating a high school freshman. They ended up getting married and she finished high school in the university town's school system.
Then again, many couples find themselves at different maturity levels and part ways.

Originally Posted by MrBigMuscles

Question about relationships and rushing and will this affect me (serious)

Hey everyone, this is a serious question which is why I came here. I am a freshman at a fairly academic focused university where Greek life is a big part of the social scene (since it’s the only way to have a social life here) I rushed this fall but spread myself too thin and didn’t end up getting a bid. Still, I had a great experience meeting people and a lot of brothers liked me and I plan to rush again in the spring, a few of my friends who joined houses this semester are hoping to see me again and I will join their house.

One thing I’ve been thinking about before spring rush is how my relationship might be viewed. I’m 19 and my girlfriend is 17- She’s in high school, but only two years younger than me and we’ve been dating for 1.5 years She was held back as a kid in elementary due to a speech impediment, so she’s listed as a sophomore even though she’s the age of a junior and is supposed to be a junior. (Basically when she’s a senior she’ll be older than all of them)

The age gap itself is normal, but I’m wondering if guys in the fraternity might think it’s weird just because she’s still in high school. I’ve heard of plenty of people dating someone younger when they first start college, but I don’t know how that’s usually perceived in Greek life. Do fraternities ever care about stuff like that, or is it generally seen as no big deal? This is due to the possibility during pledgeship (since I will eventually live with them and be brothers) where they may dig deeper, ask about if I’m in a relationship, who it is, does she go here, will she be coming to an event, etc- And they may find that grade part odd despite the context and normal gap of being held back.

I’m not worried about hiding anything, I don’t find it an issue and many people do not care, I just don’t want to seem out of touch socially or have people misinterpret the situation and it may effect me getting into a fraternity, etc.

Thank you.

TLDR; I’m a 19-year-old freshman planning to rush again in spring. My girlfriend is 17 and still in high school (was held back as a kid, she’s supposed to be a JR but this caused her to be a sophomore, despite being older than them), and I’m wondering if that might come off as weird to fraternity guys or if most people wouldn’t care. This is incase they ask and stuff during rush/pledgeship.