the advantage of being a rushee vs being a brother

[East Cost Pike]

I can't speak for everyone, but personally, being a rushee trumps brotherhood status. When I was rushing the fraternity I later joined little over a year ago , the current brothers treated me great. Everyone wanted to shake my hand, hang out and get to know me. But once I started pledging and later as a brother, I noticed that not many brothers actually cared about each other in general. It's pretty sickening actually because this breeds contempt. Now that I am a brother and have to rush guys, I can barely bring myself to put on this facade at rush events that is required because I know once the rushees are initiated, they are going to experience much of the same dynamic I and the most recent members of the chapter have: apathy!
I'm sure this is not the case at most schools, as my chapter is an awful, nasty mess. But if it's not common, I still think it's a timely and important issue.

[twinstars]

wow, that does sound really bad. i can tell you, it's NOT like that for all greek groups. during rush, i hope and hope that the girls i really like will get in, so they can "have what i have" in a sense. i am practically moved to tears on pref night (the final night of formal rush) because i feel so lucky to have been chosen for my group, knowing all i know now as a sister. not everyone is lucky enough to be in a group with a good dynamic. and things aren't always what they seem, from a rushee's perspective.

[LeslieAGD]

If I may make an analogy: joining a GLO is kind of like learning to ride a bike. When you begin as a new member, you have "training wheels." Your big is there to hold your hand, so to speak, and everyone wants to meet you and take you out. When you become initiated, it's like taking those training wheels off and learning to ride with the "big kids" (active members). It can take time, adjusting to being an active, but if once you become initiated you start loosing all those people who used to "ride with you" along the way, then maybe your sisterhood/brotherhood needs a little strengthening.

Hope that made some semblance of sense...



[This message has been edited by LeslieAGD (edited May 31, 2001).]

[Tom Earp]

E C Pike, each house is in a selling job to get new members so as to keep the chapter full! It is a shame once you have become a Brother that you feel alienated from the glad hand and smiles to sell their product. I have been through My Ritual and to many other Brothers since and I still get the Chill and the Thrill of seeing it. I too have some Alum Brothers that once they graduated they forgot about the Family that they were not born in but gained by respect. I sometimes feel sorry for them as they know not what they are losing!!!! I joined not for the time in school but for life. I still have many very close Brothers from # 1 to # 591.

------------------
Tom Earp LX Z#1
Pittsburg State U. (Kansas)

[AEPhi-QTPie]

Perhaps you can remedy this situation as an active brother. Encourage the Educator and actives to make a big deal out of welcoming your new guys. Maybe after bids are accepted, your fraternity can throw a sort of welcome week for the new ones-look at it as continued rush. If pledges are disenchanted once they accept a bid, you may face a problem with retention. Make efforts throughout the pledge program to get to know and appreciate those who are the future of your brotherhood. Have a bbq, do a service project, co-sponsor a welcome party with a sorority, make sure the pledges know the party is in their honor. Schedule an afternoon of flag football and wings. Depending on when you get big/littles, prescribe fun events for the bigs to do with the littles. I understand how you feel, just break a lousy tradition, and set an awesome precedent. Spoil the new guys with attention and friendship NOW, and they will keep it up in the future and make an outstanding fraternity. Good luck!

[shadokat]

The fact of the matter is that we're selling ourselves to these rushees, trying to get the ones we want to join our house. And when rush is over, and they are convinced, unfortunately, some people don't keep up that same enthusiasm. Because then it's about respect and earning letters and being made to go through what everyone before you did and blah blah blah.

It's unfortunate that you feel this way, and I would suggest bringing the issue up to your member at large. And when rush is over next time, instead of treating pledges or new members like they are somehow lesser than us, we can treat them like we did at rush and be excited that they will be the future of our group. Pledging can often times breed contempt to brothers when pledges are made to feel less worthy than they were during rush.

But that's another story

Best of luck!

[SH80]

Originally posted by Tom Earp:
E C Pike, each house is in a selling job to get new members so as to keep the chapter full! It is a shame once you have become a Brother that you feel alienated from the glad hand and smiles to sell their product. I have been through My Ritual and to many other Brothers since and I still get the Chill and the Thrill of seeing it. I too have some Alum Brothers that once they graduated they forgot about the Family that they were not born in but gained by respect. I sometimes feel sorry for them as they know not what they are losing!!!! I joined not for the time in school but for life. I still have many very close Brothers from # 1 to # 591.

That's why I quit ZTA! I'm sorry about your experience ECP.

[LexiKD]

I cannot relate. I love KD as much, even more than the day I began.

Sometimes you get what you put in and when you get down about something you have to change it. Sometimes a chapter never realizes their potential, but that doesn't mean your sorority sucks!

Recruitment is very different at my school than what has been listed here. We work hard on details and practice, but we don't sell hard and let off on bid day. The selling is what comes naturally, we love KD and it shows everytime we open our mouth.