Rush in a couple of months!!!!

[carnation]

Okay, I looked at the nice new Panhellenic website at my "twins'" school for this fall and got all fired up about rush again!!! It doesn't hurt that I'm REAL happy on all my pain meds for the week and I'll probably delete this last sentence!

I want to keep a list of tips for rush. Not the formal type of rush tips we give PNMs we don't know, like that fabulous thread that Southern Theta started, but just little things that I could tell my daughters or that some of you would tell a friend who's rushing. I'd like to casually drop the hints over the summer, not bombard them in August. Over the weekend, we've been discussing how they shouldn't talk about sororities negatively during rush--like, "That XYZ party really sucked!" (And they shouldn't say it on GC either because people will probably figure out who they are anyway.)

Ideas?

[KillarneyRose]

I think it's a great idea to start posting rush tips now so that the PNMs don't get inundated once it gets closer to the start of school.

As for your girls, Carnation, I personally can't imagine that I'd be able to add anything to the advice and guidance you'll be giving them. I think having you for a mom would be kind of like having a live-in rush consultant!

[AGDLynn]

1. Be realistic. Chapters can only give bids to a small number of PNMs even though they may think that you are terrific -- which YOU ARE, numerically they aren't able to at this time!

2. There is life after Recruitment ends whether you are given/accept a bid or not.

3. Make decisions based on where you would feel the happiest/most comfortable even though every female in your family history is a XX or XXX.

3. TAKE A DEEP BREATHE, LET IT OUT, AND REPEAT OFTEN!

[jharb]

1. Make sure to smile and take an active interest in the conversation. It may be overwhelming but it will make you stand out if you take a personal interest in the girl you are paired with.

2. RELAX! Have fun! Rush may be really stressful but it can be really fun too! I think the reason why I enjoyed rush so much was that I didn't take it too seriously. I knew I would be happy wherever I ended up.

3. Keep an open mind. I went into rush with some favorites but I ended up really not "clicking" with one of the houses I had loved previous to rush. I also ended up falling in love with one of the houses I hadn't given a second thought to previous to rush, I didn't end up going there but I was open to going XYZ.

4. Be friendly, even if you don't like the house don't be rude about not liking it! It's just good common sense and shows that you have manners.

I can't wait to be going through rush on the other side! Too bad I have to wait until January to experience formal on the other side.

Jess

[vukkg]

Wherever you are, be ALL there. This is the single best piece of advice I have ever recieved and I think it really applies during recruitment. You just never know where you'll wind up feeling at home.

[dzsaigirl]

My main advice is to be a lady and make friends. Plain and simple.

[33girl]

1. Keep an open mind.

2. The "most popular" house might not be the one that fits you the best. If it's not, be honest with yourself and don't try to push yourself into that mold. Perceived social status is not worth 4 years of feeling uncomfortable with the people you should be closest to in the world. Labels are just that, labels...leave them in junior high.

3. Keep an open mind.

[GPhiSweetiePie]

Here are my tips!

1. Remember that sorority rush is a system. If a certain house cuts you, it's not personal, and they're not really cutting you, there are lots of circumstances involved. Maybe they didn't rank you as high as you ranked them, maybe lots of girls ranked them as high as you did and they could only ask so many people back. Don't hold it against them, just move on, it all happens for a reason.

2. Throw all your expectations out the window. Forget all your preconceived notions and give every chapter and every girl you talk to a fair chance, because, hopefully, that's what they're doing for you. And be enthusiastic. Even if you can't really see yourself in a certain house and you still have to go to a party there, be nice and courteous...it's not being phony, it's being a good sport. There were some houses I thought I would like, and I didn't, and there were other houses I didn't think I would like, and I did. So you never know!

3. Try to remember or write down little details about some of the people you talk to. If you get asked back to a house and you end up talking to a girl you've already talked to on a previous day, it'll make that person feel good if you can remember their name or something they're involved in on campus...It shows that you really were listening when they spoke to you.

4. Last tip...Before you start rush, think of a list of a few really good questions to ask the girls you talk to when you go to rush parties...It'll get you prepared, and it will be a good way to keep the conversation going and it shows interest.

[aephi alum]

There's lots of good advice here, especially the part about keeping an open mind.

I like the idea of taking notes between parties... but never, ever, let an active sister see you doing it. Make a note of names and what you talked about. That way, when you go back for later rounds, you will remember that you already told Susie all about your summer vacation, so you should talk to Jane about something different.

Try to keep the energy going, even if you have a full day of parties. Try to be just as upbeat and energetic at your last party of the day as at your first. The sisters are just as tired as you are, if not more so.

This should go without saying, but - leave cell phones, pagers, palm pilots, etc. behind. Leave your watch behind, too, unless you have a legitimate reason for needing it - in which case, stick it in your pocket so you're not glancing at it during a party.

Avoid discussing other sororities at all costs. Avoid discussing men and fraternities, except in general terms. Never say anything negative about any person or group.

If you don't have too many sororities to go to on a given day, memorize some basic facts about each house - colors, flower, philanthropy, etc.

Before rush, make up a list of questions to ask at every house - questions about academics and philanthropy are always good. That way, when a sister asks the dreaded "Do you have any questions I can answer for you about XYZ?" you have something to respond with.

Last but certainly not least, relax, have fun, and SMILE

[phikappapsiman]

I just seriously want to thank all of you for the most sensible and well-thought of responses to this post! You women really know what is going on, and I really commend you for that. I wish more fraternity men would read these comments to learn how to approach rush- for guys, it's not about how many women you know or what sports you play, but about why do you feel that you would be able to contribute to the life of whatever organization you want to become a part of. I especially like the mention that a potential new member should not look for the most "popular" group per se- just because it looks good on the outside, it may not be what's best for you. Thanks again, and I look forward to reading more of your comments!

[PenguinTrax]

Carnation,

Did you get the PM I sent you before you were out sick?

Just checking...
Barb

[ZTAngel]

Let them know they need to be upbeat, friendly, and enthusiastic. It is a long day and everyone gets exhausted but the girls who stand out in my mind the most are the ones who still walked into the house with a big smile on their face and seemed to be really excited to be there.
Topics such as school activities, where they are living, what they did in high school are great things to talk about. Boys and parties are bad things to talk about.
Here's a oxymoron: Be open minded but be objective at the same time. When they are choosing a house that they want to be a part of, they need to be open minded to all the sororities and not immediately fall in love with the most popular house. But, they also need to be objective and question themselves on why they are choosing a house. They need to constantly ask themselves, "Could I really see myself fitting in with these girls?"

[LeslieAGD]

My tips for PNMs:

Join the sorority that you feel comfortable with, not the sorority that you wish you could be like.

Dress appropriately, but be yourself. If you're a jeans and t-shirt, lip gloss and ponytail girl, don't wear five pounds of make up and a dress every day just because you think it will impress people.

Try to find something in common with the active sister you are talking to because she will be more likely to remember you if you do.

Like aephi alum said, do not wear a watch unless you need to go to class, etc. If a sister sees you glancing at your watch, she may think you are bored/anxious to leave.

Tip for Active Sisters:
Try to remember the last name of the PNM you are speaking with. You'll often have a bunch of girls with the same first name and you won't be able to tell which is which.

[GPhiSweetiePie]

Good idea, Leslie! Any other tips for actives?

[carnation]

This is all such good advice..33, I like the way you posted "Keep an open mind" twice! The rush booklets just now arrived in the mail and the girls and I are having a fine old time with them!