Wedding planning/advice

dzsaigirl · #1 01-09-2002, 04:09 PM

I am in the process of planning my wedding, which is in June and I am just wondering who else is in the planning stages and what advice or tips, resources anyone is finding helpful. A lot of my stuff is planned, so now it is down to pretty much what everything will look like, centerpieces, flower girl dress/basket, sign in table, gift table, favors, where I should get my shower gift book, etc. So the dress, bridesmaids dresses, church, reception, caterer, photographer, honeymoon, rings, etc. have already been taken care of. So now that you know where I am at, fire away!

BrownEyedGirl · #2 01-09-2002, 10:27 PM

I wish I could help you, hon, but I really look forward to hearing about your plans as the ball gets rolling. Maybe you should ask Hootie, SisterPlum, and the others who are (or recently have been) planning their wedding too. Good luck and keep us updated!

aephi alum · #3 01-09-2002, 10:36 PM

Check out alt.wedding and soc.couples.wedding I did a lot of lurking there when planning my wedding. You've got the big things down... don't sweat the details.

Don't forget the invitations, reply cards, and program. For my wedding, I bought some great stationery at an arts and crafts supply store, designed them myself, and printed them on my laser printer, and they looked very professional

For the envelopes, I did the calligraphy by hand.

KappaStargirl · #4 01-09-2002, 10:43 PM

I'm getting married, though not for another almost-two-years. I have lots of advice though:

1) Buy a copy of Bridal Bargains by Denise and Alan Fields. It's an amazing book, lots of great money-saving tips, which I need badly!!

2) Before you buy all those tchockes, ask yourself "Will I use them after the wedding?" Fi and I are not having a guest book, favors, cake topper (we're putting flowers on the cake instead) or any of that, we feel it's just money wasted, and we are paying for the wedding ourselves. See if family members have things to loan you. We're using his parents' silver toasting glasses...money saved AND it's sentimental.

3) Flowers: I've heard a lot of good things about freshroses.com. Perhaps you will want to look at them.

4) DO NOT skimp on photography.

5) Join The Knot.

Congrats on getting married! PM me if you need any advice, or just to share bridal stuff.

dzsaigirl · #5 01-09-2002, 11:30 PM

I've got the not skimping on photography thing taken care of...He is very good and very NOT cheap. Our engagement pics turned out great and I love the guy's personality. Pictures are extremely important to me, especially since I am not having a videographer.

They way I picked my dress is indicative of my personality. I had been trying on dresses and I was extremely frustrated. My mom and I had fought about it. She hated everything I picked. I wanted to BURN everything she picked, it was pointless! Then one afternoon I decided to skip band rehearsal because I got this charge of shopping inspiration and my mom and I headed out on an impromptu dress search. I found two dresses that I liked parts of, but not the whole thing. So, in keeping with my indecisive and hard to please nature, I said to my mom "I want the top of that dress I just tried on and the skirt from the one I am wearing." She laughed and said "Yeah right, like we are just going to buy 2 dresses and cut them in half..." and then the alteration lady says "I can do that". Lucky me! So we bought the one with the skirt I like and she has ordered the stuff to make the top look like the other dress. She is cutting the top off of the one I bought and giving it to me so that I can have it made into a purse or use it as material for the flowergirl basket. So she is completely rebuilding a top to the dress. Yea!

enough sharing for now

AOIIAngel · #6 01-09-2002, 11:51 PM

Oh wow, I didnt know they could do that! That is really cool though, congrats on finding a dress, been through enough weddings to know that is almost the hardest part!!!!

Sisterplum · #7 01-10-2002, 12:34 AM

Hey! I recently got married (October 20) and the best advice I can give you is to check out things online. The Knot (http://www.theknot.com) and Ultimate Wedding (http://www.ultimatewedding.com) are great resources! Also, if you're interested, there is this great message board of brides that I used (and still use today...just cause the girls are so great, I love chatting with them) at http://www.frugalbride.com . The site is a Canadian brides site..but there are about 20 or so Americans who just came onto the site to get/share ideas! That's where I got my ideas for a lot of wedding things!
I'd agree with not skimping on a photographer (esp. since you said you're not getting a videographer). Personally I'd also put a vote in for thinking about a videographer....or even having a friend videotape it or something! My wedding video is the greatest thing I have.....it shows things I missed, things that pictures never would have caught....like how I looked every second during the vows. I will treasure it always! Actually, if you'd like I have my wedding video trailer (a 5 min piece) online and if you PM me, I can send you the link!
Feel free to PM/email me anytime with wedding questions, I'd love to help!!!

And good luck with your wedding planning....it's a lot of fun!!!!!

SuperSister · #8 01-10-2002, 12:45 AM

I was in a wedding for one of my best friends this past summer. We got our bridesmaids dresses from J.C. Penny's bridal catolouge. The service was great, they came in less than a week from when we ordered them, they were gorgeous and cost only $130 including shipping. The only thing to keep in mind is that formal dresses run a size or 2 smaller than regular dresses and I think the largest they carry is a 16

volgirl2376 · #9 01-10-2002, 03:32 PM

I have, what I think, is a fabulous idea for wedding cakes - that I saw on one of Martha Stewarts shows. This tip is because wedding cakes can cost thousands of dollars. If you are having more than say 50 guests..what you can do is have a small and beautiful wedding cake that you and your husband cut and maybe the wedding party will eat and in the kitchen you will have sheet cakes of the same type of cake and icing but not the expensive cost of like a zillion tier cake. So say you have a white wedding cake, the sheet cakes in the kitchen will be white also - so when the guests are served - there is no difference in the cake - it looks like its all the same

DeltAlum · #10 01-10-2002, 04:19 PM

From a former groom and father of two brides:

Try to understand that your husband to be may not care whether the nut bowl has peanuts or cashews. Many just want to show up, say "I do," and get on with it. It's you they love, not the pagentry.

Honestly, it's not that we/they don't understand that it's a big day, but young girls are socialized to be much more excited about the tiny details. The wedding may not be as important to him as to her -- but that doesn't mean that the marriage isn't. Don't confuse the two.

It's just not worth a knock down-drag out fight over helping to make the decision whether the napkins are purple or white.

When he says something doesn't matter -- don't take it personally. Make a decision and he will love it.

By the way, congratulations, and best wishs for many years of happiness.

KarenC725 · #11 01-10-2002, 04:25 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by volgirl2376
I have, what I think, is a fabulous idea for wedding cakes - that I saw on one of Martha Stewarts shows. This tip is because wedding cakes can cost thousands of dollars. If you are having more than say 50 guests..what you can do is have a small and beautiful wedding cake that you and your husband cut and maybe the wedding party will eat and in the kitchen you will have sheet cakes of the same type of cake and icing but not the expensive cost of like a zillion tier cake. So say you have a white wedding cake, the sheet cakes in the kitchen will be white also - so when the guests are served - there is no difference in the cake - it looks like its all the same

That sounds like a great idea! I'm no where close to getting married but like to plan ahead of time and see what other people do. That will go in my "Wedding in a Spreadsheet"

dzsaigirl · #12 01-10-2002, 04:46 PM

I have been at a wedding where they did that before. That works extremely well when there is a large number of people (this one had 300+). That way, the cake is feasable to make and everyone still gets fed. Faster too.

AGDLynn · #13 01-10-2002, 08:26 PM

1. Bring scissors to open gifts.
2. Bring tape for the gift table at the wedding/reception so that the cards won't get separated from the gifts!!!
3. Don't freakout if something doesn't go exactly as you planned, life will go on, you will be married and the guests probably didn't know about it anway!

aephi alum · #14 01-10-2002, 09:17 PM

One thing I forgot to mention - Make a checklist of *everything* you think you might need. I decided to spend the night before my wedding at the hotel where our reception would be. So I packed up my dress, petticoat, hose, white handbag, jewelry, blah blah blah, and went out there the night before the wedding. We had our "night before the wedding dinner" (not really a rehearsal dinner b/c we didn't do a rehearsal - but the whole wedding party went out to dinner, and we gave our attendants their gifts etc) and went back to the hotel. Before going to sleep, I did a nervous last-minute check. Dress, check; jewelry, check; underwear, check; shoes - OH &#*@!!!

So my dear fiance drove all the way back into the city to get my shoes from our apartment, then drove all the way back out... and our wedding was a morning wedding! And he still married me

There was a term that was tossed around on those newsgroups I mentioned: "Bridezilla". For the bride who insists that every little detail be absolutely perfect - usually driving herself, her fiance, her parents, and everybody else nuts in the process. Like DeltAlum said... it's not a crisis if everything isn't "perfect perfect" - at the end of the day, you're still married, and that's what's important.

SuperSister · #15 01-11-2002, 01:15 AM

i forgot about bridal party gifts! because my friend's wedding was on a tight budget they couldn't spend a lot of money but wanted to show their party that they cared about them and wanted to do something special. so lynn, who is very domestic, made 3 jars of jelly for everyone. it was very touching to know that she spent the time and effort on it. the jars were very pretty and everytime i eat toast i think of the happy couple.