I Don't Really Feel Like I Belong

isheep · #1 02-24-2012, 05:31 PM

Honesty...I don't feel like i belong in the chapter i am in right now. I really want to be in another chapter that i started out wanting so badly but my Rho Gamma told me to just go with the chapter that wants me the most...but now that I'm a member I really don't feel it. I do not feel the sisterly bond. I feel left out most of time. I do not feel as though i fit in or that the letters I wear on my chest are mine. I have tried to hang out with the sisters but they just doesn't seem to want to be sisters as much as I do. I still wish to be in Z more than ever. So much that i am willing to transfer to a different school just to be in Z. I don't know what to do

. I was thinking of disaffiliating myself...but I don't think I could join another sorority on campus if I do.

Any Advice would be wonderful<3
Thanks

aggieadpi_01 · #2 02-24-2012, 05:35 PM

Sobriety.....?

Psi U MC Vito · #3 02-24-2012, 05:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by isheep

Honesty...I don't feel like i belong in the chapter i am in right now. I really want to be in another chapter that i started out wanting so badly but my Rho Gamma told me to just go with the chapter that wants me the most and that was X...but now that I'm a member I really don't feel it. I do not feel the sisterly bond. I feel left out most of time. I do not feel as though i fit in or that the letters I wear on my chest are mine. I still wish to be in Y more than ever. So much that i am willing to transfer to a different school just to be in Y. I don't know what to do

. I was thinking of disaffiliating myself...but I don't think I could join another sobriety on campus if I do.

Any Advice would be wonderful<3
Thanks

Do you want to be a Y because you felt that you bonded with the sisters the best, or was that just the only sorority you had any interest in to begin with? Also if you are an initiated member, you are stuck.

DZsis&mom · #4 02-24-2012, 05:36 PM

If you are a Freshman, you are probably too young to drink....so, no need for sobriety testing.

AlwaysSAI · #5 02-24-2012, 05:37 PM

You cannot join another NPC on any campus. The unanimous agreement within the NPC prohibits that from happening.

You are not the first new member in the world to have a case of the "new sister blues". AXiD is what you are--make the best of it. Having that sisterly bond doesn't happen spontaneously at initiation--just like any other relationship--it takes time and effort to develop, grow, and flourish.

Get involved in a chapter committee or offer to help with an event. Spend as much time with your sisters as you can. Give it some time and the sisterly bond will be there.

Oh, and I would recommend deleting the names of each sorority from your original post.

DubaiSis · #6 02-25-2012, 03:10 AM

You have to WORK at it. And I can almost guarantee you'd be saying the same thing if you chose the other chapter. Get involved, fake your enthusiasm if you have to. It can lead to actual enthusiasm over time. Friendship is hard and nobody's going to hand it to you on a silver platter. Get in there, do the stuff the other girls are doing, talk to someone in the chapter you trust, and you can work it out. Or you can give up, not have a sisterhood for the rest of your life, and likely be bitter for the next 40 years over something that you could have made the best of.

ASUADPi · #7 02-25-2012, 08:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlwaysSAI

You cannot join another NPC on any campus. The unanimous agreement within the NPC prohibits that from happening.

You are not the first new member in the world to have a case of the "new sister blues". AXiD is what you are--make the best of it. Having that sisterly bond doesn't happen spontaneously at initiation--just like any other relationship--it takes time and effort to develop, grow, and flourish.

Get involved in a chapter committee or offer to help with an event. Spend as much time with your sisters as you can. Give it some time and the sisterly bond will be there.

ditto to what my awesome friend said!

(we need to do dinner soon)

AlwaysSAI · #8 02-25-2012, 10:55 AM

^^^hahaha. I just mentioned to Mr. KDR last night that I hadn't talked to you since my birthday.

Sciencewoman · #9 02-26-2012, 10:40 AM

Transferring to another school so that you can have a chance of joining Z seems like a very drastic step. You would have no assurance that you would be offered a bid there, and you don't know whether you'd fit in better with the members of Z on that campus. I think you're suffering from a case of "the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence syndrome"...instead of fantasizing about how much better it must be in Z sorority, I think you should make every effort to put on a smile, make some friends, and contribute to the sorority you have joined.

AOII Angel · #10 02-26-2012, 11:25 AM

For all you know, the women in your dream sorority at your new school will be just like the women in your chapter at your current school and nothing like their sisters in your dream chapter at your school. No two chapters are alike. Your chapter picked you for a reason, and the other chapter didn't. It's time to put away those "what if" dreams that are holding you back from making lasting friendships and experiencing a sisterhood that could do so much for you if you would just let it. It doesn't happen over night or without work (and that includes joining the other chapter) so you have to MAKE friends and MAKE memories. It doesn't just happen because you are suddenly a member of a sorority. Give it time and effort. You'll get out of it what you put into it.