Don't Know What To Do? HELP

[nyr1993]

Hey y'all
So i recently just rushed for a sorority and loved it at first but now I'm not sure if I would like to be in it. I need some advice. Let me give you the details of the story.
During Rush I really fell in love with 2 sorority's. Ill give them names Red and Blue. It was really hard to decide which one I loved more. Some girls where going for the Red one and thats the only one they would choose so after i came from tours at the red i loved it but i loved it even more just because all my friends loved it to. I still love BLUE just as much but i guess my friends made want to be in the RED one just a bit more. I ended up putting RED first on my list at the end of two weeks of Rushing and got a bid.
This is where the difficulty comes in. This sorority is a bit religious , even though the sorority itself isn't a sorority based on religion many girls in it do practice the same one. Its not that i don't respect religion its just that because the girls have that in common i kinda feel outta the loop/awkward/ out of place when ever things are brought up that pertain to that. They also have weekly brunches and friday dinners which are a kinda tradition to that religion, they invite everyone but if you are not of that religion many do not go. I love the girls who recruited me there but other then them I don't feel like i fit in. Chances are I'm probably going to drop it

Second part of this is I still want to be a part of Greek life. It honestly seems like a lot of fun and I know it would make the most of my college experience. I understand that once you accept a bid and want to drop and re rush you must wait 365 day from your bid day which will mean i will have to wait till my next formal recruitment which means i will be seeing all the sororities i have seen before especially RED.
First things first, Will my encounter with my old sorority be awkward? chances are yes but how do i handle it.
2) I know that many girls will recognize me will this give me a disadvantage? How do i overcome this? I constantly see girls around campus from other sororities that know i went through rush and took a bid.

I just need some advice about the whole thing, any advice will help thanks!

[DubaiSis]

You are experiencing the Unicorns Pooping Rainbows syndrome. You made a choice and then it turns out these girls are human. They're not perfect, they aren't oh my god so much like you, and they are no longer kissing your feet every time you walk through the door.

If you want to depledge and take your chances again in a year, that is your prerogative, but you should know that the chances that you'd be feeling the exact same thing with the other group is very likely. It might be they drink too much, study too much, are too into their hair, but there would be something, or a list of things that turn you off about that group as well.

There are a couple issues to consider about your decision. How many women are in this chapter? If it's 20 and you are feeling like they're all religious, that's one thing. If there are 100 and you think that, you're most likely wrong and you just need to make an effort to meet more members.

To answer your questions about will it be awkward, of course it will be. You have to assume that none of these girls will be your friend anymore. After all, you are telling them in no uncertain terms that you don't like them. And there is no guarantee, regardless of what anyone tells you, that you will be invited to join the sorority that actually does have unicorns pooping rainbows. By choosing another sorority, you put the good chapter as second best, and now you will have proven yourself to be a flake.

So drop out if you're miserable but I would assume that this is the end of the line for your Greek life. It could turn out differently, but I wouldn't go forward planning on that. Sorry.

[nyr1993]

I do realize that there all human, that is why I chose them in the First place, and i knew the sorority had a reputation of being that "specific" religious frat and even during rush i was embarrassed to asking thinking it would be a stupid question and that the girl i was asking would be offended by it but she wasn't. I asked straight up if this was know at the " specific" religious frat. she told me yes but hardly anyone actually practices, it just so happened that there all together. And i also understand that I'm not going to like everything about a certain sorority but it just so happens that there religion is very important to them and they bond over it and i don't so its a bit awkward. The things is I really do want to make it work because of the girls that I've fell in love with that i know i could be best friends with. I try to make an effort with the girls but it only works for so long till they go back to there religious similarities.
And by recruiting again your telling me that every chapter is going to think I'm a flake?

[AOII Angel]

So you can't be friends with Jewish women because they practice their religion together? Do you think practicing Christians are unable to bond with people of other religions because they don't go to church with them? SMH. Go ahead and drop. The women of this organization don't deserve a "sister" like you. Thankfully, we've moved beyond the times when we segregate people into the "Jewish" sorority so you know not to join it.

[SydneyK]

Argh. Who was it who coined the phrase 'pledge the library'? I understand that there's a level of informality in some online communication, but when you're typing to a community of people whose education level is college level or beyond, it's a nice gesture to use proper grammar/spelling/etc. It's difficult to read your post it's so riddled with mistakes.

Originally Posted by nyr1993

During Rush I really fell in love with 2 sorority's.

Sororities. Apostrophes indicate possession. You're trying to convey plurality. Print this poster and hang it on your wall.

Originally Posted by nyr1993

Some girls where going for the Red one and thats the only one they would choose so after i came from tours at the red i loved it but i loved it even more just because all my friends loved it to.

'Where' refers to a location - you're looking for the past tense of the verb 'to be,' which is were.
That's where the apostrophe belongs.
When writing in English, the pronoun I should be capitalized.
When you mean 'also,' the word is too.
I don't have near the amount of patience or desire to explain the importance of commas, but they're handy.

Originally Posted by nyr1993

I do realize that there all human, that is why I chose them in the First place

'There' refers to location (as in over there, not here). They're, the contraction of 'they are,' is the word you're looking for.

Originally Posted by nyr1993

And by recruiting again your telling me that every chapter is going to think I'm a flake?

'Your' indicates possession, or pertaining to you. For example, 'Your grammar skills could use some help.' The correct word is you're, the contraction of 'you are.' Here's another poster that can help.

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

So you can't be friends with Jewish women because they practice their religion together? Do you think practicing Christians are unable to bond with people of other religions because they don't go to church with them? SMH. Go ahead and drop. The women of this organization don't deserve a "sister" like you. Thankfully, we've moved beyond the times when we segregate people into the "Jewish" sorority so you know not to join it.

This.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

You are experiencing the Unicorns Pooping Rainbows syndrome.

HAHAHA, thank you, this is great. Maybe we need an "unwritten rush rules" thread where this can go next to Murphy's Law of Rush Crushes.

[fascination]

SydneyK, thank you!

[AnchorAlumna]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

You are experiencing the Unicorns Pooping Rainbows syndrome. You made a choice and then it turns out these girls are human. They're not perfect, they aren't oh my god so much like you, and they are no longer kissing your feet every time you walk through the door.

If you want to depledge and take your chances again in a year, that is your prerogative, but you should know that the chances that you'd be feeling the exact same thing with the other group is very likely. It might be they drink too much, study too much, are too into their hair, but there would be something, or a list of things that turn you off about that group as well.

There are a couple issues to consider about your decision. How many women are in this chapter? If it's 20 and you are feeling like they're all religious, that's one thing. If there are 100 and you think that, you're most likely wrong and you just need to make an effort to meet more members.

To answer your questions about will it be awkward, of course it will be. You have to assume that none of these girls will be your friend anymore. After all, you are telling them in no uncertain terms that you don't like them. And there is no guarantee, regardless of what anyone tells you, that you will be invited to join the sorority that actually does have unicorns pooping rainbows. By choosing another sorority, you put the good chapter as second best, and now you will have proven yourself to be a flake.

So drop out if you're miserable but I would assume that this is the end of the line for your Greek life. It could turn out differently, but I wouldn't go forward planning on that. Sorry.

Best. Answer. Ever.
Kudos to DubaiSis!!

[AlphaFrog]

OP did get "a part" right, though. Shocking.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by nyr1993

I understand that once you accept a bid and want to drop and re rush you must wait 365 day from your bid day

Actually, this is wrong. It's the spirit of a calendar year, not an actual calendar year. i.e., if you received your bid on September 15, and rush next year begins on September 8, you can still rush. No one is timing it with a stopwatch or something.

As others have said, it all depends how Jewish this particular chapter truly is. If it's 80 girls and 40 of them are Jewish, that shouldn't be a problem. If it's 30 girls and 28 of them are Jewish, that's a different matter.

Are your friends who nagged you into choosing Red Jewish? If the answer's yes, you probably should have thought about that a little more before you followed them like a sheep.

[knight_shadow]

Originally Posted by nyr1993

I do realize that there all human, that is why I chose them in the First place, and i knew the sorority had a reputation of being that "specific" religious frat and even during rush i was embarrassed to asking thinking it would be a stupid question and that the girl i was asking would be offended by it but she wasn't. I asked straight up if this was know at the " specific" religious frat. she told me yes but hardly anyone actually practices, it just so happened that there all together. And i also understand that I'm not going to like everything about a certain sorority but it just so happens that there religion is very important to them and they bond over it and i don't so its a bit awkward. The things is I really do want to make it work because of the girls that I've fell in love with that i know i could be best friends with. I try to make an effort with the girls but it only works for so long till they go back to there religious similarities.
And by recruiting again your telling me that every chapter is going to think I'm a flake?

.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by knight_shadow

.

Yeah, I wondered about that too.

[DoctorD]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

You are experiencing the Unicorns Pooping Rainbows syndrome.

I saw this ^^ and immediately thought of this post.

[AOII Angel]

Tisk, Tisk, knightshadow and MysticCat...we are Fraternities, too! She does say sorority and girls in the thread. Are you just calling troll?

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

Tisk, Tisk, knightshadow and MysticCat...we are Fraternities, too! She does say sorority and girls in the thread.

Oh, I know that many sororities are Fraternities, though I rather doubt that the OP knows that. And "frats"?

Are you just calling troll?

Just making an observation. Draw from it what you will.