I appreciate GreekChat!

LPIDelta · #1 07-26-2007, 12:00 AM

Ok, this is kind of a vent.

Actually I appreciate the frankness of many of the regulars here on GC. I am on another board for military spouses, and everyone just sugar coats everything. "I know you're saying that you don't like being alone and that you don't like anything about the military lifestyle, but you're going to love it once you're married...tell him how you feel and he'll change his mind"--instead of saying it like it is. If you want a husband who is home all the time--then don't marry someone in the military! I know you can't always choose who you fall in love with--trust me, I know!--but ugh, this is someone's life and people just want to be "Yeah you! You're great! It'll be fine!" And if I say anything, I'll just be the big B!

That doesn't happen here--and while I don't always agree with everyone--I appreciate that people try to tell it like it is so that people don't have unrealistic expectations.

Thank you for letting me vent--I will get off my soapbox now.

Senusret I · #2 07-26-2007, 12:07 AM

Give us the site so we can invade it!

No, just kidding.

It's nice to know that the culture on GC is appreciated, though nutty we all may be.

LPIDelta · #3 07-26-2007, 12:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Senusret I

Give us the site so we can invade it!

I seriously thought about this but those poor women wouldn't stand a chance.

Drolefille · #4 07-26-2007, 12:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Heather17

I seriously thought about this but those poor women wouldn't stand a chance.

Lol. I think people lose touch with being supportive vs. lying. Being supportive is "it's tough, but I think it's worth it" lying is "You'll do fine!" Being supportive doesn't always mean encouraging people to do things they're not suited for either.

minDyG · #5 07-26-2007, 01:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Heather17

Ok, this is kind of a vent.

Actually I appreciate the frankness of many of the regulars here on GC. I am on another board for military spouses, and everyone just sugar coats everything. "I know you're saying that you don't like being alone and that you don't like anything about the military lifestyle, but you're going to love it once you're married...tell him how you feel and he'll change his mind"--instead of saying it like it is. If you want a husband who is home all the time--then don't marry someone in the military! I know you can't always choose who you fall in love with--trust me, I know!--but ugh, this is someone's life and people just want to be "Yeah you! You're great! It'll be fine!" And if I say anything, I'll just be the big B!

That doesn't happen here--and while I don't always agree with everyone--I appreciate that people try to tell it like it is so that people don't have unrealistic expectations.

Thank you for letting me vent--I will get off my soapbox now.

Oh. Em. Gee. I completely agree with you on this one. I had to stop frequenting a certain forum for "married mommies" (although, honestly, the name itself was almost enough to make me not go back) because for one thing, everyone was too friggin nice to each other, and for another, none of the idiots on the board seemed to understand the simple concepts of spelling and grammar! Ugh. On a sidenote, GC has definitely made me more of an internet hardass...tehehe!

SoCalGirl · #6 07-26-2007, 02:20 AM

I appreciate people who appreciate GC frankness. While it's true that back in the Dark Ages I think we managed to be frank while being a lot kinder I also think we get way more dumbasses and crybabies today.

Heather,
Feel free to start Military Wife threads! I know there's a few on here and plenty more Military Brats.

We can be the wind beneath your wings!

LPIDelta · #7 07-26-2007, 10:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SoCalGirl

Heather,
Feel free to start Military Wife threads! I know there's a few on here and plenty more Military Brats.

We can be the wind beneath your wings!

Ah..thanks.

I appreciate that idea! With all that is going on, it would be great to connect with others related to the military...I just never thought about doing it through Greekchat!

I actually do think that other board isn't right for me--its more annoying than supportive. Its probably me and not them--I am sure the women on the board are nice and well-meaning, but our experiences seem so different despite being similar.

Thanks for letting me vent everyone--I think it was just what I needed.

navane · #8 07-27-2007, 09:34 AM

Heather,

I think I can relate a bit to what you said. As an academic adviser, I am constantly having to deal with parents who phone me up on behalf of their students. Phoning in to ask a basic question for one's own understanding isn't so bad...but calling in more than once a day, at 30+ minutes each, to obsess over your son's class schedule is out of order. These women (and it's usually women) just can't let go and they want to do everything for their college-aged children.

I recently came across an internet forum for parents whose kids are leaving for college and I nearly gagged when I read some of the postings. One mom posted her worries about her daughter who was on academic probabtion and who had to make a visit the assistant dean. She posted to ask if perhaps she should be following up because she wasn't confident her daughter had written everything down. The people responding were like, "Oh, definitely, you should call the assistant dean and check on her status *everyday*. Make sure you ask the dean about her GPA and what she can do to improve it. If they don't give you the answers you want, keep calling."

I wanted to pull my hair out and kick some of these people. I'm sure they're well-meaning, but no...the dean does NOT want to hear from your mommy and it's ILLEGAL for the dean to break privacy laws regarding your GPA.

If some of those parents posted their ridiculousness on GC, I know they would get a quick lesson in, "Sit down, shut up and let your adult children take care of themselves." Sometimes GC is too harsh and sometimes it provides that awesome reality check.

.....Kelly

SWTXBelle · #9 07-27-2007, 09:38 AM

LOL - when I was teaching college I cannot tell you how many parents were INCENSED when I wouldn't discuss their children's grades with them.
"But I pay the bills!" was their anguished cry. "Yes, I understand, but the federal government regards your child as an adult, and I am not allowed to violate his/her privacy by discussing this with you. Might I suggest you talk to your child?"

carnation · #10 07-27-2007, 09:43 AM

We know a woman who called her daughter's calculus professor at UGA and screamed at him when her kid made a D. As a professor, I've never gotten a call of complaint from a parent and I'm sure I'll be

if I ever do!

OneTimeSBX · #11 07-27-2007, 10:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by navane

Heather,

I think I can relate a bit to what you said. As an academic adviser, I am constantly having to deal with parents who phone me up on behalf of their students. Phoning in to ask a basic question for one's own understanding isn't so bad...but calling in more than once a day, at 30+ minutes each, to obsess over your son's class schedule is out of order. These women (and it's usually women) just can't let go and they want to do everything for their college-aged children.
.....Kelly

i swear, do you work with me???

unless your child is still in high school and enrolling, or you are signing financial aid papers, you have no business as a parent involved in anything college related!!!

i work for a small technical college and it is the same thing over and over again. your child is an adult. get a hobby!!

Dionysus · #12 07-27-2007, 10:56 AM

It's the kids fault too. Why do they tell their parents everything at that age? I have those kind of parents. They know very little about my life because of that reason.

ForeverRoses · #13 07-27-2007, 11:19 AM

I agree that parents are way too involved once a kid leaves for college. My old roommate's Mom would call at least once a day to check on her daughter. And God Forbid if she was not called back. She once even drove the 4.5 hours to school to check on her daughter when she wasn't called back for 2 days.

However I think sometimes the colleges play a right into the parents hands. I know at my alma mater, the school started notifying parents if their children were found to have drugs or alcohol if under 21. If the school can't tell the parents their children's grades, why can they notify them of disciplinary action? (actually I think all students sign a waver to allow it, but you don't have a choice).

AlphaFrog · #14 07-27-2007, 11:21 AM

Drugs and alcohol under 21 would be a legal matter, and would become public record (if arrested). If the school is notifying the parents without an actual arrest, then that's ridiculous.

OneTimeSBX · #15 07-27-2007, 11:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ForeverRoses

I agree that parents are way too involved once a kid leaves for college. My old roommate's Mom would call at least once a day to check on her daughter. And God Forbid if she was not called back. She once even drove the 4.5 hours to school to check on her daughter when she wasn't called back for 2 days.

i can understand if you are from Small Town, Montana going to school in NYC...i would check on my child a few days a week too, just an email or text message would do. its funny, whenever you hear about someone who disappears from a campus, the parents are always the first to know something is up because "Karen calls everyday, but she didn't call us yesterday..." i talk to my mom everyday and i live a block away from her. we dont have that type of relationship where we HAVE to talk all the time, but we always speak just because. she isnt coming to my house or my job looking for me.