DARK/LIGHT...SKIN COLOR.........Is this still an issue? Let's be honest Sorors & SF'

[cjoanell]

Originally Posted by deja

Is this an issue? I was in the mall a few days ago and a nice looking brother in his late 30's maybe early forties approached me. (Very nice looking Sorors) Any whooo, we were in engaged in a little small talk and all of a sudden I lost my hearing,,,,,yes I went absolutely deaf. I just could not hear pass the words that left the lips of this fine, well built 6"5 about 210 "dark-skinned" brothers full lips (beautiful white teeth). The words Sorors & SF's were......."You are so pretty to be sooo dark." I still cannot believe that. Is it written some where that dark-skin sisters are biologically challenged, where beauty is concerned? Is it an unwritten law/belief that beauty is only among the white/prit near white?

Surely this is not still an issue!

Deja

------------------
TO WHOM MUCH IS GIVEN....MUCH IS EXPECTED.

I've heard all my life and still do. My father was dark skin and I took his side although my mother is closer to light skin. Being that both of my parents are from the south, I have gotten used to it. It's sad that I have learned to get use to it. I think that society has beaten this into our heads along with the average size of a woman is a 4, when in reality now it is a 10, along with straight hair v. natural hair. Then they wonder why our children are so confused and vain.

[PrettyInPink777]

This is stirring up family memories.

I have always heard about girls with 'pretty hair'. Apparently, my elders were evolved enough not to say "good hair", but the plain truth is 'pretty' was the subsitute for 'good'. The subtle (or not-so-subtle!) implication was that the compliment was intended only for those with LONG, straight hair. One's hair couldn't be pretty and short / nappy -- those identifiers were mutually-exclusive.

Another interesting identifier was the concept of the "cute black girl'.... kind of like the skewed concepts of the 'woman doctor', 'male hos', and 'white trash'.

Finally -- As a young girl, I used to hear this in Mississippi if a woman was unattractive but fair-complected..... "That's just some yellow throwed away!" Has anyone else ever heard that?

[Jill1228]

I heard this from my grandmother (who is color struck as all get out)--she was talking about my cousin's new wife.
"She is ugly because she is too black." WTF? I have also heard her say about someone: "She is so black but she is pretty."


That is like hearing someone say: "she has a pretty face but she is so fat"

I came this close to calling my grandmother out and telling her that she should be ashamed of herself

[Wonderful1908]

Originally Posted by Jill1228

I heard this from my grandmother (who is color struck as all get out)--she was talking about my cousin's new wife.
"She is ugly because she is too black." WTF? I have also heard her say about someone: "She is so black but she is pretty."


That is like hearing someone say: "she has a pretty face but she is so fat"

I came this close to calling my grandmother out and telling her that she should be ashamed of herself

Do we have the same grandmother?

She would only let me play in the shade as a child so I would stay light...

I think she really likes my daughter so much becuase she is light with "good" hair

[Jill1228]

Wonderful, I think we have the same grandmother, sisterfriend! If not, they gotta be related (my grandma is 1 of 12 kids).

I am rather dark and I kept hearing the stay out of the sun. I love the sun and the ocean...not gonna happen

WTH is "good hair"?. If it is on your head and you like it, it is GOOD HAIR

[skywalker20_99]

Originally Posted by Jill1228

Wonderful, I think we have the same grandmother, sisterfriend! If not, they gotta be related (my grandma is 1 of 12 kids).

I am rather dark and I kept hearing the stay out of the sun. I love the sun and the ocean...not gonna happen

WTH is "good hair"?. If it is on your head and you like it, it is GOOD HAIR

AMEN! This is the EXACT response that I use when people talk about "good hair". I even had to clown some family members recently for saying that my son has good hair. I told them that ALL of our hair is good because we have the fortune of HAVING it. When people make such foolish comments, I think about a friends of mine who doesn't have hair because alopecia - she would be happy with ANY type of hair.

[Conskeeted7]

I just had a funny experience today. An older white lady was in Sephora with her (assuming) grandkids who were black. The kids were playing in the makeup while grandmother was at the counter. They put foundation on that was about 4 shades lighter than their skin. When grandmother turned around and saw them, she said 'you 2 getting ready for Halloween?' The older girl (about 6 yrs. old) said 'we're pretty little white girls now.' The grandmother just took them and left. The sad thing is that I'm sure they've heard that from the adults they're around and they'll grow up feeling inferior because of it.

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by Conskeeted7

I just had a funny experience today. An older white lady was in Sephora with her (assuming) grandkids who were black. The kids were playing in the makeup while grandmother was at the counter. They put foundation on that was about 4 shades lighter than their skin. When grandmother turned around and saw them, she said 'you 2 getting ready for Halloween?' The older girl (about 6 yrs. old) said 'we're pretty little white girls now.' The grandmother just took them and left. The sad thing is that I'm sure they've heard that from the adults they're around and they'll grow up feeling inferior because of it.

This little guy, is my nephew... His mother is caucasian and his father is Black and has a medium dark brown complexion like me. We all truly love this young man, but his mother refuses to accept his diverse heritage in both her interactions and friendships with various children. But, that is how his father, my brother, wanted it. My nephew actually has features reminscent to a combination of both my mother and father's and his mother families' genetics. The prominent features are his forehead and nose and some facial shaping that are distinctly AKA_Monet's family...

[Wonderful1908]

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet

This little guy, is my nephew... His mother is caucasian and his father is Black and has a medium dark brown complexion like me. We all truly love this young man, but his mother refuses to accept his diverse heritage in both her interactions and friendships with various children. But, that is how his father, my brother, wanted it. My nephew actually has features reminscent to a combination of both my mother and father's and his mother families' genetics. The prominent features are his forehead and nose and some facial shaping that are distinctly AKA_Monet's family...

Can't see the pic..

[pretty edAKAted]

The first couple of days of school I was in the financial aid office and there was a young white girl with a mixed looking baby with her calling her mommy. the majority of the black guys that were in there started talking saying


" see that is why i want me a white girl so i can have some pretty children"

all of the other guys in the room followed saying

"yeah, man i know what you are talking about, that is a beutiful lil' girl"

Why do people think they have to get pregnant or have a baby by a white person in order to be considered beautiful. Why are they so afraid their children will be dark skinned? I think this is just ignorance and someone needs to raise thier children correctly without superficial thoughts like that.

[Animate]

Originally Posted by pretty edAKAted

The first couple of days of school I was in the financial aid office and there was a young white girl with a mixed looking baby with her calling her mommy. the majority of the black guys that were in there started talking saying


" see that is why i want me a white girl so i can have some pretty children"

all of the other guys in the room followed saying

"yeah, man i know what you are talking about, that is a beutiful lil' girl"

Why do people think they have to get pregnant or have a baby by a white person in order to be considered beautiful. Why are they so afraid their children will be dark skinned? I think this is just ignorance and someone needs to raise thier children correctly without superficial thoughts like that.

WoW!!! Those guys sound like they will be future daddies to multiple mothers.
I'll have beautiful kids cause I have the beautiful gene.

[southernelle25]

Originally Posted by pretty edAKAted

The first couple of days of school I was in the financial aid office and there was a young white girl with a mixed looking baby with her calling her mommy. the majority of the black guys that were in there started talking saying


" see that is why i want me a white girl so i can have some pretty children"

all of the other guys in the room followed saying

"yeah, man i know what you are talking about, that is a beutiful lil' girl"

Why do people think they have to get pregnant or have a baby by a white person in order to be considered beautiful. Why are they so afraid their children will be dark skinned? I think this is just ignorance and someone needs to raise thier children correctly without superficial thoughts like that.

Sure, they say that, but then they become upset when the children are born pure white in appearance or simply non-black, which is certainly possible given the already mixed heritage of most African Americans. I have read too many stories about black men abusing, emotionally and sometimes physically, their children (born of white women) for being "too light". I have seen posts online from men complaining because they thought their children would be born "with some color", i.e. "kinda light" with "good hair". These men don't consider that their children may not look anything like what they expect racially, that they may find it difficult to relate to sons who more closely resemble Wentworth Miller or "the man" than themselves. Though I feel for the children, I can't help but laugh at those who roll the dice and lose.

[Jill1228]

OMG, Thank you!
It kinda peeves me when people know you are in an interracial relationship/marriage and trying to conceive/ are pregnant they say, "you are going to have beautiful children". WTF?

Makes me wanna holler

[DSTCHAOS]

Originally Posted by Jill1228

OMG, Thank you!
It kinda peeves me when people know you are in an interracial relationship/marriage and trying to conceive/ are pregnant they say, "you are going to have beautiful children". WTF?

Makes me wanna holler

That annoys me too because ugly children can happen to anyone.

[Educatingblue]

Originally Posted by DSTCHAOS

That annoys me too because ugly children can happen to anyone.

ROTFLMAO!!! You sound like one of those drug addiction commercials