The ramblings of a single woman... (TFKA ...crying pink and green tears... - Page 6

Honeykiss1974 · #76 12-16-2003, 11:46 PM

((((((((((((((IDEAL08)))))))))))))))

lovelyivy84 · #77 12-17-2003, 12:25 AM

Soror I think that we all feel your pain at some point.

((((Ideal08)))))

It will get better. Just stay busy, get out there and meet people and think about enjoying yourself.

Prissfit1908 · #78 12-17-2003, 01:01 AM

This is why I love my Sorors. I logged on and I saw this thread. Talk about right on time....

I am so sad. I thought I had finally met someone genuine. Real. However, it seems that my deepest fears have been confirmed and realized. I try to always go into a relationship being open and honest, expecting the best. I am optimistic and realistic when I meet someone. But, I am growing more and more disenchanted.

I try to self-analyze to determine if I'm doing something wrong, but I feel like I am being true to myself. I don't regret anything that I've done since I met this man. But I am so damn tired of wasting my time. And why does this have to happen right before my birthday/Christmas?

Not that there is ever a good time to breakup, but oh my damn... I just feel so hopeless when it comes to my love life. You know how people always say, "Stop looking and love will find you." Well, I stopped looking a lonnnnng time ago, and all that's finding me are idiots and liars.

I give great advice to my girls about love and getting through periods like this, but I am having a hell of a time consoling myself. I feel a Florida Evans moment coming on.... DAMN! DAMN! DAMN! Oh well...

1savvydiva · #79 12-17-2003, 10:13 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by 1savvydiva
I am suprised that this thread was back on top, I specifically signed on tonight to post a message here.

WHY THE HELL DID I GO BACK TO HIM?

That was one year ago, and now we are going through the same chit.

Why do we do some of the stupid things that we do for 'love'? I tell you what though....you won't see my ass in here complaining about P-diddy in 2004, that's for sure!

...and if I do, ya'll feel free to come to Columbia and PIMP slap me!

toocute · #80 12-17-2003, 10:23 AM

Here's a big ole hug for all of y'all

((((((((((((((((sistafriends)))))))))))))

Honeykiss1974 · #81 12-17-2003, 10:59 AM

(((((((((((PrissFit1908))))))))))

(((((((((1savvydiva)))))))))))))

1savvydiva · #82 12-17-2003, 11:35 AM

Thanks for the hugs ya'll, but I'm SKRAIT!!!!

RedefinedDiva · #83 12-18-2003, 12:16 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by 1savvydiva
...and if I do, ya'll feel free to come to Columbia and PIMP slap me!

You promise?

Girl, I feel you on what you are saying, though. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. *le sigh* We can kick off a sistahdiva support group. We will make it through 2004 without complaining and whining and feeling down on ourselves. If these men don't act right, we will kick them to the curb and move on. Yeah, it's easier said than done, but the idea of it is cool.

But you always have all the luck meeting guys. You still never told us your secret....

lovelyivy84 · #84 12-18-2003, 12:18 AM

What a fascinating idea RD, lol.

If they don't act right tell them to go? I will so be trying that.

I dont have a problem doing that to be honest. If it's not right, it's just not and I don't waste my time. I can find and discard ten unsuitable men easily, but trying to find the good one...that's finding the needle in the haystack!

AKA_Monet · #85 12-18-2003, 09:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Prissfit1908
I try to self-analyze to determine if I'm doing something wrong, but I feel like I am being true to myself. I don't regret anything that I've done since I met this man. But I am so damn tired of wasting my time. And why does this have to happen right before my birthday/Christmas? Not that there is ever a good time to breakup, but oh my damn... I just feel so hopeless when it comes to my love life. You know how people always say, "Stop looking and love will find you." Well, I stopped looking a lonnnnng time ago, and all that's finding me are idiots and liars.

Been there...

Done that...

Gotta T-shirt...

-Mr. AKA_Monet

Questions:

Are you all READY to be married?

'Cuz I LUUUVVVEEE me some Mr. AKA_Monet, but sometimes...

He still hangs out with the fellas on Friday, Happy Hour time and I ain't met no friends so that I can hang out too--so I'm sittin' alone at home on a Friday night... Then he told me never to show up where he is hangin' out... Which means, that there are some "thangs" that I might not be prepared to see...

Then EVER SATURDAY, I have chores... He's so dayum anal about it... I must vacuum... I must wash the dishes a certain way...

Then as much as I luvveee me some Mr. AKA_Monet, I am lucky he remembers to put the seat down... That he doesn't spray the bathroom after using it... Chit you don't see when you are dating or even living together...

But, when I was sick 2 weeks ago with the flu... Mr. AKA_Monet was right there, making me Thera Flu, hot tea, miso soup and making sure I was comfy...

He can't take his hands off me...

And last year this time, I prayed to God to make the 2002 Holiday Season, the last one I spent alone for the rest of my life...

Within 5 months of meeting Mr. AKA_Monet, we were married...

And I'm 35 years old!!!

So ladies, don't give up... Even if you havta "cross the street" and date a brotha from anotha... If your expectations are to have a man with "assets", then there ain't a whole lotta bruhs out there with dat... Sometimes, you're lucky, like I was... But, there aren't that many to begin with to give you what you truly desire... So, sometimes, a sistah finds herself either "crossin' the street"... Or on "other side of midnight..." Hey, whateva's cleava... But at least you got sumbody...

And sometimes, you gotta lay down the law from the jump... You automatically set a 3 month waiting period... If a man cain't tell you what y'all about after 3 months--it ain't gonna change beyond that... To save "face"--3 months... No sense in "flingin'" it for 5-6 months... A man can commit to football tickets... He can commit to a golf club... He can sho commit to you within 3 months... I ain't talkin' marriage--I'm talkin' boyfriend/girlfriend within 3 months--skeriousssss... And if he runs skurred, then he may need to go to the "lower stakes" table...

'Cuz ladies, you are wonderful, you are blessed and you got it goin' on, you are sexy, vibrant and smart... Your worth every effort... You are all goddesses on your own sanctuary. You deserve bliss (in a Tantric sort of way)... You are a child of God...

So let's start acting like it...

Steeltrap · #86 12-18-2003, 09:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ideal08
ttt cuz i'm lonely

(((((Soror Ideal08))))))

One of these days, you will find a man who deserves the wonder of you.

GRITS · #87 12-19-2003, 01:57 AM

I think the hardest thing for me at my age, is to come home and see all of my friends and associates ( there's a difference!) so happy with their significant others, and see them truly enjoying thier life. I feel like it is so hard to be a 19 year old Christian woman, who's a virgin(and plans to stay one until marriage)! I've been in love with one of my good friends since the 7th grade, and it just won't go away. The worst part about it is that he is off the market, and he hasn't had the best track record with women or even his girlfriend. I've never dated him, and only brought it up once a few years ago. I've never had a boyfriend before, half because I've haven't had time, and another because I never wanted anyone but him. It sounds childish, but I can't see my liofe wthout him, because he's such a good friend, but then i can imagine the two of us together. I give so much time and energy to our friendship, and sometimes he just blows it off like it's nothing. There's more to the story, but I just don't want tpo be his doormat, but I just can't het out without ruining our friendship. Huh, what a life! It's time to go back to NC!

UpPinkies · #88 12-19-2003, 08:54 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by AKA_Monet
Been there...

Done that...

Gotta T-shirt...

-Mr. AKA_Monet

Questions:

Are you all READY to be married?

'Cuz I LUUUVVVEEE me some Mr. AKA_Monet, but sometimes...

He still hangs out with the fellas on Friday, Happy Hour time and I ain't met no friends so that I can hang out too--so I'm sittin' alone at home on a Friday night... Then he told me never to show up where he is hangin' out... Which means, that there are some "thangs" that I might not be prepared to see...

Then EVER SATURDAY, I have chores... He's so dayum anal about it... I must vacuum... I must wash the dishes a certain way...

Then as much as I luvveee me some Mr. AKA_Monet, I am lucky he remembers to put the seat down... That he doesn't spray the bathroom after using it... Chit you don't see when you are dating or even living together...

But, when I was sick 2 weeks ago with the flu... Mr. AKA_Monet was right there, making me Thera Flu, hot tea, miso soup and making sure I was comfy...

He can't take his hands off me...

And last year this time, I prayed to God to make the 2002 Holiday Season, the last one I spent alone for the rest of my life...

Within 5 months of meeting Mr. AKA_Monet, we were married...

And I'm 35 years old!!!

So ladies, don't give up... Even if you havta "cross the street" and date a brotha from anotha... If your expectations are to have a man with "assets", then there ain't a whole lotta bruhs out there with dat... Sometimes, you're lucky, like I was... But, there aren't that many to begin with to give you what you truly desire... So, sometimes, a sistah finds herself either "crossin' the street"... Or on "other side of midnight..." Hey, whateva's cleava... But at least you got sumbody...

And sometimes, you gotta lay down the law from the jump... You automatically set a 3 month waiting period... If a man cain't tell you what y'all about after 3 months--it ain't gonna change beyond that... To save "face"--3 months... No sense in "flingin'" it for 5-6 months... A man can commit to football tickets... He can commit to a golf club... He can sho commit to you within 3 months... I ain't talkin' marriage--I'm talkin' boyfriend/girlfriend within 3 months--skeriousssss... And if he runs skurred, then he may need to go to the "lower stakes" table...

'Cuz ladies, you are wonderful, you are blessed and you got it goin' on, you are sexy, vibrant and smart... Your worth every effort... You are all goddesses on your own sanctuary. You deserve bliss (in a Tantric sort of way)... You are a child of God...

So let's start acting like it...

That great!!! And I am very happy for you soror, but it just doesn't work out that easily for some of us (pointing to myself). I've sent that shout out to God, but (looking around for my other half) nothing. People have told me those lies before, "Don't look, let it come to you" or "you know you have so much going on". Men have told me that I intimidate them, then that must mean that they don't have their stuff together so I just look at them like they are crazy.

Conskeeted7 · #89 12-19-2003, 09:51 AM

It may be as AKA_Monet said that some ladies are really not ready for marriage and serious committment just yet. Just because friends and family members are in relationships doesn't mean that it's your time to be also. If you are praying for it, then know that the Lord answers prayers in HIS time not our time.

Right now, you may need to focus on other areas of your life that would be sacrificed if you were married. Marriage is a completely different lifestyle. Also, the Lord may be preparing your husband. He may not be ready for you.

My husband and I have known each other since we were 16. We dated at that time, but broke up when we graduated. Well, when we got back together years later, it was obvious that the Lord meant for us to be together. We got married 6 months after we started dating again. However, if we had married before or even stayed together we wouldn't have grown to become the people that we are today and were when we got married.

So, just be patient. The Lord has a plan for you and your life.

1savvydiva · #90 12-19-2003, 10:12 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by RedefinedDiva
You promise?

Yeah, I promise!!!!

Oh...the um...secret...(beware, kinda confusing)

Well, actually the dilemma has been resolved because Prospect J totally showed his ass yesterday. Then he had the nerve to tell me that I get upset and give up too quickly. I don't think so...i just think that after all that I've been through, I have a very low tolerance for unnecessary BS and I REFUSE to put up with it.
The problem was that Prospect J had a scrumdiddlyumptious acquaintance (not really a friend...a friend of a friend) that was trying to holla at me also. They were both there the night we met, and Prospect R actually tried to make a move first. I was actually feeling Prospect R more...but he never followed up and asked for my number (after J started making moves). Fast forward to about a week ago, Prospect R saw my homegirl and inquired about me and she gave him my number telling him to call me and check on me because I was sick. Prospect J had been slacking for like the last 2 weeks acting like he was interested, so I had already wrote him off. When R called me, I was like

, but then I was still like

because I didn't want J to think that I wrote him off because I wanted to get with his boy. After some investigation, I found that they weren't as close as I originally thought and it would be cool for us to continue conversing. He seems nice...as they all do when you first meet them.

@ RD I do meet alot of guys, why I don't know...but I can never seem to find one worth keeping so I guess it doesn't matter.

Meeting has never been my problem, I've always been the type that could have several platonic male friends. Actually, I used to be offended, because I would think that I would be the perpetual "just my homegirl"...but now it's different.
Anyway, I'm going to hit you up and get your email, I wanna tell you more about yesterday.