Teachers: the names you will never name your own kids

[AOII_LB93]

Kids that I have taught in the last 7 years who have been demon spawn or just have annoyed me to the point that if I ever saw them on the street I might claim not to know them:

Tayani (pron Tee- ani)
Caleb
Ivan
Dominique
Anthony
Brian
Jaime
Warren
Jennifer
Melina
Jackie (I had three this year)
Stefano
Jose

ETA: Tyshay
Arley

Both caused me no end of grief.

[sceniczip]

These names are just crazy! How do people even come up with these names?!

The only one I have so far from teaching experience is Melissa. I have other names on the list but that's the only one on there because of teaching! I never liked the name Melissa anyways

[BraveMaroon]

I'm not a teacher, but I worked with a woman who named her daughter Britney Crystal. Eugggh. But it gets better. The last name? Ball.

Charming.


In grade school in the late 70s/early 80s I had schoolmates named Venus Wiggly and Curvaceous Bass.

[Rio_Kohitsuji]

Alex (boy or girl), Connor, Clark, Queionna, Tori; Those are mine from last year. Alex is such a no-go it's sad; I even had 3 of them in one class!

[ComradesTrue]

More ridiculous names:

Your parents named you what?

Siblings Dow and Indiana Jones, among other unfortunate individuals, were interviewed for the article.

[ASTalumna06]

I'm not a teacher, but everyone I have ever met in my 24 years on this planet with the names Ashley and Austin have been evil.

It amuses me that both names have come up a few times already.

[smiley21]

Originally Posted by ASTalumna06

I'm not a teacher, but everyone I have ever met in my 24 years on this planet with the names Ashley and Austin have been evil.

LOL. At the child care center where I work, I know an Ashley and Austin who are sister and brother. They are just plain bad.

[FSUZeta]

i work at a school and there is a family there who named their children truman, reagan and carter-i kid you not!

i also know two families who each named two of their daughters chandler and taylor.

[BabyPiNK_FL]

There was some version of Daiquarius or something like that.
Also there will not be any Ollie's in my family.
There were others, but the names were so outlandish I don't think I'll ever remember them. And I can not for the life of me remember the name of the little boy who insisted on getting out of his seat and pushing the file cabinet across the room once his aide left.

[breathesgelatin]

Originally Posted by FSUZeta

i work at a school and there is a family there who named their children truman, reagan and carter-i kid you not!

LOL - were they actually naming them after the presidents? If so, what the heck were their political views. I can remotely see Truman and Reagan being in the same family but Carter and Reagan - it seems that never the twain shall meet!

I like the name Regan for a girl but I know she'd always get called Reagan because of the president. And I think Carter is OK for a boy. Although what am I saying, I had a chapter sister named Carter as well and I liked that name for her - it fit her I thought. Truman is pretty awful anyway you slice it (I think).

[KatieKate1244]

My friend recently was working as a substitute teacher in a 4th grade classroom, and had 4 Kaylas. Well, actually:

2 Kayla(s)
1 Kaila
1 Kalah (I have a friend named this but she pronounces it Cal-La, like a calla lilly)

She said she also at that school of around 120 kids or so, 30-some are named Kayla.

[AnchorAlumna]

April Dawn
Misty Dawn
Tiffany (sorry, I just really hate that name)
Reprobatus (for real!)
Antwan
UGH!

[TrueBlueKappa]

I almost forgot about ANGEL, the kid who regularly cursed me out and threatened me! He also tried to set fire to another classroom. So, no Angels for me!

[Xidelt]

Today was the first day of school. I have five Taylors in one period!

[WinniBug]

Teachers...since school is starting back, here are some chuckles from Jeff Foxworthy to get you going!!



YOU might be a school employee if you believe the playground should be equipped with a Ritalin salt lick.



YOU might be a school employee if you want to slap the next person who says, "Must be nice to work 8 to 3:30 and have summers off.



YOU might be a school employee if it is difficult to name your own child because there’s no name you can come up with that doesn’t bring high blood pressure as it is uttered.



YOU might be a school employee if you can tell it’s a full moon or if it going to rain, snow, hail....anything!!! Without ever looking outside.



YOU might be a school employee if you believe, "shallow gene pool" should have its own box on a report card.



YOU might be a school employee if you believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says, "Boy, the kids sure are mellow today."



YOU might be a school employee if when out in public, you feel the urge to snap your fingers at children you do not know and correct their behavior.



YOU might be a school employee if you have no social life between August and June.



YOU might be a school employee if you think people should have a government permit before being allowed to reproduce.



YOU might be a school employee if you wonder how some parents MANAGED to reproduce.



YOU might be a school employee if you laugh uncontrollably when people refer to the staff room as the "lounge."



YOU might be a school employee if you encourage an obnoxious parent to check into charter schools or home schooling and are willing to donate the UHAUL boxes should they decide to move out of district.



YOU might be a school employee if you think caffeine should be available in intravenous form.



YOU might be a school employee if you can’t imagine how the ACLU could think that covering your students chair with Velcro and then requiring uniforms made out of the corresponding Velcro could ever be misunderstood by the public.



YOU might be a school employee if meeting a child’s parent instantly answers this question, "Why is this kid like this?"



YOU might be a school employee if you would choose a mammogram over a parent conference.



YOU might be a school employee if you think someone should invent antibacterial pencils and crayons...and desks and chairs for that matter!



YOU might be a school employee if the words "I have college debt for this?" has ever come out of your mouth.



YOU might be a school employee if you know how many days, minutes, and seconds are left in the school year!