lonely and depressed... - Page 4

PandaOnProzac · #46 06-16-2003, 08:06 PM

There were a lot of posts so I only skim read. Anywho the same is true for guys as well. It's sorta weird to think that there are men and women going through the same problem yet they don't know each other.

Jill1228 · #47 06-16-2003, 08:37 PM

Been there, done that, going thru that now. One of my reasons for going thru Alum Initiatiation and joining Beta Sigma Phi.

I got married a year and a half ago. Prior to that I moved 3000 miles away from my family and friends. Besides my now husband, I knew NO ONE! And it is hard for me to make friends

I would definitely recommend if your GLO has an alumni chapter, get busy with them there. Take classes, join a gym, do volunteer work...whatever.

One thing I did was get a pet...
Well the pet found me (an abandoned kitten)

Quote:

Originally posted by MoxieGrrl
sairose: There is nothing I can say that hasn't been said on these pages. I will say that I am envious.

Ok everyone....how about a flipside problem? I'm 24, madly in love, and getting married soon. My friends are not. Most do not have significant others & don't really want to have one. Also, my friends are spread out all over the country. The ones that are in Pittsburgh are all about going to clubs & stuff and that isn't my scene anymore (don't let my post in the Random thread fool you).

So, I'm pretty much alone in a city where I don't know anyone and am far away from family & friends. Sometimes I want to put an ad in the paper that says, "Won't someone be my friend. Pretty please?"

Maybe it's the whole graduating from college and being really on my own angst that is getting to me. It just sucks though. I cry all the time because I haven't been in this situation before and don't know how to handle it.

Anyone have a similar problem and could give me advice?

DeltaSig · #48 06-16-2003, 10:55 PM

What I wanna know is where are all the good women at??? Everyone one I meet that seems like the one turns out to be some totally different and just faking their personality to accomadate me. It seems like women are just totally not the same anymore. Maybe I'm just old fashioned but I put women who respect themselves in a totally higher regard than anything else on this planet. It just seems like most women are concerned with being so in control and dominate now at days that they don't realize a good thing when it's staring them right in the face. NO BS, lies, or drama just pure honesty and integrity. Old fashioned values my friends one day it'll pay off.

madmax · #49 06-19-2003, 04:34 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sairose
I'm not shy; I'm VERY social and talkative and outgoing. But not with guys. I mean I'll talk to them, and be friends with them, but I can't flirt. Guys I like never have a clue I'm interested.

I've liked one particular guy for about a year. He has no clue, and I don't think I will tell him. One, I'm too scared to.

You already know the problem. Just read your last post. You are lacking in game skills. You don't flirt. You don't open up. You never take a chance. That is the problem. You have to make some subtle changes and start flirting, opening up and taking chances. It's not that tough and you will get better at it with practice.

When a person flirts it makes that person much more attractive to the opposite sex.

sigmagrrl · #50 06-19-2003, 04:44 PM

So, why is that we are all so lonely, yet it seems like everyone is looking for someone? What is the missing ingredient? What are we overlooking?

Peaches-n-Cream · #51 06-19-2003, 05:00 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sigmagrrl
So, why is that we are all so lonely, yet it seems like everyone is looking for someone? What is the missing ingredient? What are we overlooking?

I think that you might need to change your approach. Sometimes women go out thinking 'I won't meet anyone' or 'If I don't meet someone, it's a waste of time.' Instead go out with a goal, for example I am going to talk to three new people. It doesn't have to be a meaningful conversation, just something to get some practice talking to new people. Try to have a light friendly conversation. Maybe it will lead to something maybe it won't. After going out and talking to new people, you will feel comfortable. Be sincere, confident, and friendly. It will attract new people.

tinydancer · #52 06-19-2003, 05:04 PM

I agree. If nothing else, you may make a new friend. There's nothing bad about that.

sigmagrrl · #53 06-19-2003, 05:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Cream
I think that you might need to change your approach. Sometimes women go out thinking 'I won't meet anyone' or 'If I don't meet someone, it's a waste of time.' Instead go out with a goal, for example I am going to talk to three new people. It doesn't have to be a meaningful conversation, just something to get some practice talking to new people. Try to have a light friendly conversation. Maybe it will lead to something maybe it won't. After going out and talking to new people, you will feel comfortable. Be sincere, confident, and friendly. It will attract new people.

I think I'll try this for the next few days! I'm going out tonight and tomorrow night. I'll see what happens to my self-confidence....

AUDeltaGam · #54 06-19-2003, 06:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DeltaSig
Maybe I'm just old fashioned but I put women who respect themselves in a totally higher regard than anything else on this planet.

More guys need to think like this!

Peaches-n-Cream · #55 06-19-2003, 06:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sigmagrrl
I think I'll try this for the next few days! I'm going out tonight and tomorrow night. I'll see what happens to my self-confidence....

Good luck!!!

sigtau305 · #56 06-19-2003, 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DeltaSig
What I wanna know is where are all the good women at??? Everyone one I meet that seems like the one turns out to be some totally different and just faking their personality to accomadate me. It seems like women are just totally not the same anymore. Maybe I'm just old fashioned but I put women who respect themselves in a totally higher regard than anything else on this planet. It just seems like most women are concerned with being so in control and dominate now at days that they don't realize a good thing when it's staring them right in the face. NO BS, lies, or drama just pure honesty and integrity. Old fashioned values my friends one day it'll pay off.

Amen, Deltasig

DZTUBAGIRL · #57 01-05-2005, 11:06 AM

I so understand what everyone is talking about. I am 23 (going to be 24 in March) and I haven't been in a real relationship for like 4 years. I have had those guys that come and go but nothing real. I am graduating soon and I feel like if I don't meet someone now I never will. I know what my problem is, I am a very quiet person. I am so self conscious I don't even talk to people in my classes unless they talk to me first because I am afraid they won't want to talk to me. The only time I am outgoing is when I have had a little to drink and the bar isn't the greatest place to meet someone. I really don't know what to do.

Sorry I babbled on and on, thanks for listening. Good luck to everyone else going through a time like me. I guess we need to be patient and wait for someone to come to us.

CutiePie2000 · #58 01-05-2005, 08:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DZTUBAGIRL
I was playing around on the computer at work and was looking at the personals. I actually found someone who looks cool and I have a lot in common with. I thought about responding but I am afraid to.

To quote Wayne Gretzky, "You miss 100% of the shots that you never take".

Yeah, you might get burned.
Yeah, you might find that the person is not that attractive in real life.
Yeah, you might find that the chemistry is not terrific.
Yeah, the person might actually be married.

But, you just gotta try try try, baby!

dphies00 · #59 01-05-2005, 11:11 PM

Hey guys - not to solve complex problems and emotions with a simple statement, but it a rough time of year. The holidays are over, resolutions are forcing us to deal with aspects of our personality and lifestyle that we know we should want/need to change. And with the letdown after decorations are taken down and the parties end... well its depressing to begin with.

And its cold and disgusting in most of the nation this time of the year.

Just a thought to consider when it seems like maybe its too much... outside factors are contributing to your emotions.

James · #60 01-05-2005, 11:16 PM

Thats a wise observation.

Quote:

Originally posted by dphies00
Hey guys - not to solve complex problems and emotions with a simple statement, but it a rough time of year. The holidays are over, resolutions are forcing us to deal with aspects of our personality and lifestyle that we know we should want/need to change. And with the letdown after decorations are taken down and the parties end... well its depressing to begin with.

And its cold and disgusting in most of the nation this time of the year.

Just a thought to consider when it seems like maybe its too much... outside factors are contributing to your emotions.