Cyberbullying

[DrPhil]

Yeah the Internet generation is doomed for many reasons including cyberbullying. I won't go on my Internet generation rant.

[Tulip86]

The thing it that there is no escape... even online you will get bullied. You can't escape it at school, you can't escape at home, and they're there online as well. For everyone to see. The fact that others can witness your humiliation adds to the bullying.

[Drolefille]

This is kind of the "I never wore a seat belt as a kid/slept in the back window/etc. and I'm fine" of bullying. It's nice that YOU were fine, but other people died.

Similarly many bullied kids did just fine, others killed themselves. The ultimate goal of anti-bullying campaigns, along with more targeted campaigns like It Gets Better is to keep kids safe and actually stop harassment rather than just brushing it off as 'kids will be kids" or "builds character."

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by Jen

That apology rings so false with the mother claiming it was done because "it burns Rebecca Rose's ass raw." Yeah. That sounds remorseful.

What is wrong with these people? Thankfully, the internet and their stupidity will live on always - have fun shaking the reputation for being a disgusting human being!

I admittedly felt malicious glee in hearing that 4chan published their address and did their typical harassment. I mentally slapped myself for it later, but damn those people are assholes.

[honeychile]

IMHO, cyberbullying is different in one major respect. Some kid might be a real nut job, and get bullied at school. The bullies might even follow him on the school bus or follow him home.

But with cyberbullying, there's no escape. Go home, watch some tv, and boot up to do homework & see what's going on on the internet and wham! There it is again. The bullies that the kid knows have now influenced total strangers to jump in on him, and it's relentless. Sooner or later, the bullies get the cell phone number, and now that's ruined, too. It's not a matter of turning off the computer or screening the calls, because let's face it, even Wikipedia has bastardized articles that the kid might have to use to do his homework. I would imagine that this same kid has bad dreams, so there is literally no escaping the harrassment.

Bullies are cowards. They are so afraid that they will lose their own standings that they will heckle or join in just to stay on top. Some scapegoats survive this, some don't.

My gosh, there was a kid in my class when I was in high school who was thrown into the Goodwill box every day after school, and sometimes the bullies threw lit matches in after him. It made me sick to my stomach - enough so that I told my mom about it, and she had a friend call the bullies and tell them that she saw what happened, got their names, and would call the police if it ever happened again. It stopped after that, but what if it hadn't? Of all people, I had a good reason NOT to like the scapegoat, but someone had to stand up for this guy, and the bullies were more than I could handle.

He had a chance, because he could go home, do his homework and watch tv. His parents screened his phone calls, so no one was calling him, berating him all night. He got a good night's sleep so he could survive another day.

Had he lived in this day & age, I could totally understand him cracking under the pressure. Seriously.

[knight_shadow]

Originally Posted by honeychile

IMHO, cyberbullying is different in one major respect. Some kid might be a real nut job, and get bullied at school. The bullies might even follow him on the school bus or follow him home.

But with cyberbullying, there's no escape. Go home, watch some tv, and boot up to do homework & see what's going on on the internet and wham! There it is again. The bullies that the kid knows have now influenced total strangers to jump in on him, and it's relentless. Sooner or later, the bullies get the cell phone number, and now that's ruined, too. It's not a matter of turning off the computer or screening the calls, because let's face it, even Wikipedia has bastardized articles that the kid might have to use to do his homework. I would imagine that this same kid has bad dreams, so there is literally no escaping the harrassment.

I can see that, but I'm sure we all know that bullying doesn't stop at the end of the day. The kid may have a break tonight, but it goes right back into effect tomorrow.

The cyber-victim's escape could be not turning on the conmputer/visiting social media sites.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by knight_shadow

I can see that, but I'm sure we all know that bullying doesn't stop at the end of the day. The kid may have a break tonight, but it goes right back into effect tomorrow.

The cyber-victim's escape could be not turning on the conmputer/visiting social media sites.

Maybe. But they also know that the entire world can see what's written about them. Whereas a kid that got harassed in high school could look forward to at least getting to start fresh in college before online harassment, now those facebook/myspace pages about them follow them around...and if their bullies are really resourceful and move on to internet sites that won't take harassment down if reported, it's there forever.

[als463]

This idea of cyber-bullying is disturbing, to me. I don't mean the whole, "So-and-so hurt my feelings on GC, FB, or MS." I mean the, "Let's go on such-and-such website, which features particular schools, and make an entire thread about how so-and-so is such a whore and has STDs." That bothers me that people can just go to (that site) and do that.

Sure, people on here may not agree with one another but, no one (and I truly believe NO ONE) would start a thread about how als463 is a woman of the night or a bigot. I mean, people can do that on FB and MS, though. When people start posting your name, address, phone number, job info, etc. then it is a problem.

Also, WHAT THE HELL to that woman who said that horrible stuff about a 7 year-old? I bet that woman feels remorse. Maybe she feels remorse because she was getting death threats. That woman and her husband are the definition of pure trash. Just wow.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

Maybe. But they also know that the entire world can see what's written about them. Whereas a kid that got harassed in high school could look forward to at least getting to start fresh in college before online harassment, now those facebook/myspace pages about them follow them around...and if their bullies are really resourceful and move on to internet sites that won't take harassment down if reported, it's there forever.

Major difference between bullying then vs bullying now.

In 1985, if Jack got bullied every single day at his HS in NY State, he could choose to go to boarding school in Virginia or college in Oregon. Yes he would have to deal with those assholes when he came home to visit, but for the most part, his day to day (and the rest of his life) would be pretty much free of them if he chose to make it so.

Whereas in 2010, Jack's roommate to be, the guys in the fraternity he's rushing, and the girl he wants to date can Google him and see the "Jack is a dweeb" page that some dickhead made back in 2008. No matter how much those people think that the sort of person who does such a thing is a useless idiot and has Jack completely wrong...that "Jack is a dweeb" is still going to stick in the back of their brain, and prevent Jack from getting a truly new beginning.

I read an article in Allure many moons ago about a woman who had major dental issues and was tormented mercilessly as a kid. She said the worst taunt was being told "You're so ugly you'll never get married" - because they were trashing not just her present but telling her she had nothing to look forward to in the future as well.

[als463]

Originally Posted by knight_shadow

I can see that, but I'm sure we all know that bullying doesn't stop at the end of the day. The kid may have a break tonight, but it goes right back into effect tomorrow.

The cyber-victim's escape could be not turning on the conmputer/visiting social media sites.

While I do agree that the cyber-victim could escape by not turning on the computer or visiting social media sites, we have to look at how that is victim-blaming. Sure, they could stop going on FB, MS or whatever but, why should they have to because someone else is acting like an a-hole. I'm not talking about going on a forum like GC. I'm talking about FB (which seems to be a major part of everyone's form of communication these days-like texting). Why should someone else suffer because they are being harassed? That's like saying a kid who gets bullied at school could just quit school, switch schools, or wait for college. Why should it have to be that way?

I do see what you were saying and I know that's not how you meant it.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by als463

While I do agree that the cyber-victim could escape by not turning on the computer or visiting social media sites, we have to look at how that is victim-blaming.

Right it kindof reminds me of the "buyer's remorse" DA in Colorado that's running for office, but with a different crime.

[knight_shadow]

Originally Posted by als463

I do see what you were saying and I know that's not how you meant it.

Yea, I didn't mean that the "cyber-victim" had a complete escape. I just meant that could be his/her "break" for the day, similar to a "real life" victim's break (being at home).

Basically playing devil's advocate for a moment. I still think bullying that spills over into real life sucks.

[knight_shadow]

Originally Posted by Tippiechick

Yes, GC has gone into the area of cyberbulling. No, I don't think many people want to talk about the elephant in the room.

I don't think anyone is avoiding any issues. We've already stated that some of the people on here bring GC into real life (cyber-stalking, etc), but the vast majority of the "bullying" that goes on here doesn't do that. Calling someone a bitch or disagreeing with someone =/= bullying.

[DrPhil]

I created the thread and I'm the only Delta in the room. There goes the elephant.

Originally Posted by knight_shadow

I don't think anyone is avoiding any issues. We've already stated that some of the people on here bring GC into real life (cyber-stalking, etc), but the vast majority of the "bullying" that goes on here doesn't do that. Calling someone a bitch or disagreeing with someone =/= bullying.

Yes, Tippiechick, you don't have to imagine an elephant to discuss what you did and apologize for it again. Others who feel that they have done something and want to discuss it are free to do so. Those who have had something done to them via GC are free to discuss that. I certainly don't know the details of the bullying that has occurred on GC. People who know the details are free to discuss if that's the direction they want the thread to go in.

[rhoyaltempest]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

I created the thread and I'm the only Delta in the room. There goes the elephant.



Yes, Tippiechick, you don't have to imagine an elephant to discuss what you did and apologize for it again. Others who feel that they have done something and want to discuss it are free to do so. Those who have had something done to them via GC are free to discuss that. I certainly don't know the details of the bullying that has occurred on GC. People who know the details are free to discuss if that's the direction they want the thread to go in.

I don't consider it real cyberbullying when you can clearly leave a website like GC and not return (or come back as someone different, which folks do on here all the time) and you don't know most or any of the folks in real life. On the other hand, when people have your email, home phone number and/or address, or you're on a school or job site and you actually know the people and have to see them in real life, that's something different entirely.