Joining another sorority after 2 years

[HQWest]

Originally Posted by Greek_or_Geek?

It's not always a matter of a top tier house at a competitive campus refusing to affiliate a member transferring from a "lesser" chapter. Here are a couple of other circumstances I have seen play out:

-An intensely academic chapter has maintained the highest Greek GPA for many years and are very competitive about it. Mary Marginal wants to affiliate and her GPA is barely at the national minimum and far below the chapter's minimum.

-At a strong chapter at a smaller regional school where almost all students come from the same general area and everyone seems to have known everyone since high school. Hannah Ho wants to affiliate but her antics at the new college already reflect her legendary patterns of behavior from high school and her previous university.

Also have seen Linda Lost transfer from one private school to a couple of notches better/same size private school affiliate with the chapter and then stand around talking about how the other chapter and her previous school was better ALL the time. Classic was bringing a friend-who-was-a-girl (not a girlfriend cause that would have been ok, too) to formal because she did not have a date and had the two of them standing around and snarking about other ladies dresses and dates all night. So WHY did you transfer?

[carnation]

Originally Posted by Greek_or_Geek?

It's not always a matter of a top tier house at a competitive campus refusing to affiliate a member transferring from a "lesser" chapter. Here are a couple of other circumstances I have seen play out:

-An intensely academic chapter has maintained the highest Greek GPA for many years and are very competitive about it. Mary Marginal wants to affiliate and her GPA is barely at the national minimum and far below the chapter's minimum.

-At a strong chapter at a smaller regional school where almost all students come from the same general area and everyone seems to have known everyone since high school. Hannah Ho wants to affiliate but her antics at the new college already reflect her legendary patterns of behavior from high school and her previous university.

Somehow I just saw this post years later. LOLOL!!!

[33girl]

Is this thread why BadCat got banned??

[33girl]

Originally Posted by BadCat25

This whole situation reminds me of the stories of vindictive college coaches who restrict the ability of college athletes to transfer to other schools. In one case I remember the coach said the athlete couldn't transfer to any school closer than an 8 hr drive from his school. These coaches have received tons of bad press on this issue.

This is apples and elephants.

Originally Posted by DGTess

I think a factor, perhaps small, perhaps not, is the lexicon. The system is not reminding women they've taken a PLEDGE. The word PLEDGE implies so much more than "new member" in terms of commitment.

A-friggin-men. I feel the same way about getting rid of the word "suicide" and pretending that "recruitment" isn't really still "rush." And not to get on a tangent, but referring to your pledges as "baby [fill in the mascot]s" doesn't exactly convey to them that they are taking on a LIFETIME RESPONSIBILITY. If anything, it does the opposite - lets them know nothing is expected of them except to look adorable and move on when they outgrow it.

[HQWest]

Originally Posted by 33girl

And not to get on a tangent, but referring to your pledges as "baby [fill in the mascot]s" doesn't exactly convey to them that they are taking on a LIFETIME RESPONSIBILITY.

THIS!

It also doesn't convey that this is an honor or a privilege?
I thought we wanted them to be ladies?

[aggiegphi]

Originally Posted by 33girl
And not to get on a tangent, but referring to your pledges as "baby [fill in the mascot]s" doesn't exactly convey to them that they are taking on a LIFETIME RESPONSIBILITY

Originally Posted by HQWest

THIS!

It also doesn't convey that this is an honor or a privilege?
I thought we wanted them to be ladies?

Wholeheartedly agree with both of you. That has turned into one of my biggest pet-peeves; especially considering they are women (I've never heard of fraternities doing this) who will become the leaders of their chapter, and maybe even officers/leaders in the larger organization one day.

[WCsweet<3]

Originally Posted by 33girl

A-friggin-men. I feel the same way about getting rid of the word "suicide" and pretending that "recruitment" isn't really still "rush." And not to get on a tangent, but referring to your pledges as "baby [fill in the mascot]s" doesn't exactly convey to them that they are taking on a LIFETIME RESPONSIBILITY. If anything, it does the opposite - lets them know nothing is expected of them except to look adorable and move on when they outgrow it.

I agree. By trying to go PC and get rid of words that have bad connotations, it would appear that some of the ideas have been lost. Mainly I feel this with "pledge". I also feel like most of the PC terms are pointless. Oregon changed "Greek Life" to "Fraternity and Sorority Life" because first term had bad connotations with it. Does it really change anything? No. Does using the terms, rush, pledge, or suicide change the fact that some people will haze or have PNMs SIP? No. It will still happen. Does New Member really carry over the idea that a person is pledging an organization?

[Jen]

Originally Posted by WCsweet<3

I agree. By trying to go PC and get rid of words that have bad connotations, it would appear that some of the ideas have been lost. Mainly I feel this with "pledge". I also feel like most of the PC terms are pointless. Oregon changed "Greek Life" to "Fraternity and Sorority Life" because first term had bad connotations with it. Does it really change anything? No. Does using the terms, rush, pledge, or suicide change the fact that some people will haze or have PNMs SIP? No. It will still happen. Does New Member really carry over the idea that a person is pledging an organization?

I still use the old terms. They make SENSE. I think by dumbing down and PCing the lexicon, you've got a lot of people who really don't get the responsibility anymore. My biggest pet peeve is all the PC language that often takes 5 words to say what 1 did.

[HQWest]

I can totally understand how when someone from [I]little[I] college transfers to [B]BIG[B] U - the girls at Big U want to maintain some control about who moves into the house with them.

Let's review. How about a top five reasons I have heard for transfer?
1. Money situation changes and need to move closer to home or need to save money.
2. Didn't get in at the school they wanted the first time, so they try again and get it on the second try.
3. Program that they want isn't offered at the school they started at.
4. Don't feel like you fit in at your school.
Oh and I almost forgot - 5. a boy (or girl? a sweetheart. whichever.)

I really REALLY feel bad for the folks in category number 1. Bad things happen to good people. Unfortunately, this could mean not being able to fully participate in Greek life at your new school (but in this case maybe early alum status might be a relief?)

In all the other categories - this is why we wanted to give you a 6 to 8 week new member period before initiation. You should see these things coming. You should talk to people about them. They are important. You are talking about the REST of your life.
But hey #2 worked when they didn't get into the school they wanted, right?

[33girl]

Originally Posted by HQWest

I can totally understand how when someone from [I]little[I] college transfers to [B]BIG[B] U - the girls at Big U want to maintain some control about who moves into the house with them.

Let's review. How about a top five reasons I have heard for transfer?
1. Money situation changes and need to move closer to home or need to save money.

I really REALLY feel bad for the folks in category number 1. Bad things happen to good people. Unfortunately, this could mean not being able to fully participate in Greek life at your new school (but in this case maybe early alum status might be a relief?)

I think that this is more apt to be Big Flagship U to Small State-Owned U, and that the dues go down along with the tuition. In that case, transfers are usually met with open arms - if they desire to be involved. More likely what happens is what AOIIAngel mentioned.

[HQWest]

Originally Posted by 33girl

I think that this is more apt to be Big Flagship U to Small State-Owned U, and that the dues go down along with the tuition. In that case, transfers are usually met with open arms - if they desire to be involved. More likely what happens is what AOIIAngel mentioned.

I am thinking of a couple of situations in particular where Big U was closer to home. (i.e. - Linda Lost needed to move back in with mom and dad to save money, so transferred back in state to save money, but still wants to be in the sorority, so you HAVE to take her, but she says you can't make her live in house? )

Or going from out of state or private school to in-state Big U. to save money.

And... transferring to try recruitment again or "because I just don't fit in here" still happens --> in state to out of state, out of state to in state, Big U to small U, small U. to Big U., left half of state to right half of state....

[33girl]

well, going from my experience, Big Flagship U is anything but cheap, even if you do live at home. I know that varies widely from state to state though.

One of the sororities (sorry I don't remember who) had a blog post going off about "babies" but I think it kind of fell flat. I mean she complained about it more as differentiating new members rather than it being juvenile. The fact is...pledges AREN'T members. If they were, someone couldn't depledge and join another group a year later. It would violate NPC rules. Until you take that initiation oath, you are part of the chapter - just as I would say non-member advisors and sweethearts are part of the chapter - but you are not an actual member.

[FSUZeta]

Originally Posted by 33girl

well, going from my experience, Big Flagship U is anything but cheap, even if you do live at home. I know that varies widely from state to state though.

One of the sororities (sorry I don't remember who) had a blog post going off about "babies" but I think it kind of fell flat. I mean she complained about it more as differentiating new members rather than it being juvenile. The fact is...pledges AREN'T members. If they were, someone couldn't depledge and join another group a year later. It would violate NPC rules. Until you take that initiation oath, you are part of the chapter - just as I would say non-member advisors and sweethearts are part of the chapter - but you are not an actual member.

AMEN!!

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by 33girl

well, going from my experience, Big Flagship U is anything but cheap, even if you do live at home. I know that varies widely from state to state though.

One of the sororities (sorry I don't remember who) had a blog post going off about "babies" but I think it kind of fell flat. I mean she complained about it more as differentiating new members rather than it being juvenile. The fact is...pledges AREN'T members. If they were, someone couldn't depledge and join another group a year later. It would violate NPC rules. Until you take that initiation oath, you are part of the chapter - just as I would say non-member advisors and sweethearts are part of the chapter - but you are not an actual member.

They may not be full fledged members, but I don't think they're babies either. That's my issue with it. It's dumb and condescending. Not to mention that your NM might be 21 years old and older than the people calling her a baby.

[DZTurtle11]

Originally Posted by 33girl

well, going from my experience, Big Flagship U is anything but cheap, even if you do live at home. I know that varies widely from state to state though.

One of the sororities (sorry I don't remember who) had a blog post going off about "babies" but I think it kind of fell flat. I mean she complained about it more as differentiating new members rather than it being juvenile. The fact is...pledges AREN'T members. If they were, someone couldn't depledge and join another group a year later. It would violate NPC rules. Until you take that initiation oath, you are part of the chapter - just as I would say non-member advisors and sweethearts are part of the chapter - but you are not an actual member.

Delta Zeta had a blog post about this same thing, but it's more about demoralizing the new members. Though it might be the one you read, too.

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