I've searched and searched, still looking for some help...

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by 33girl

I know, they have to go a loooong way to be as fun as membership selection meetings and rush practice, right?

And I said "most fun partS." There are of course, other fun things too - but as I said, a mixer isn't just a time to hook up. It's also to have fun hanging out with your sisters and other Greeks. It's just sort of sad that people get into a fraternity or a sorority partly for the purpose of widening their social horizons, and then refuse to partake of the social events.

Find me a social event that doesn't involve loud music, dancing and alcohol. I broadened my social horizons fine without them.

I just object to the idea that if you're not going to the mixers you're ignoring the fun part(s) and the rest is a wash. My chapter had a similar dropoff as engineers, teachers, nurses and pre-med students all started doing much harder work/clinicals/student teaching/etc. Once 40 hours of your week minimum is gone to school stuff, Wednesday night doesn't sound like such a fun time to go out and party. Semi-/formals were all on weekends so those were nearly universally attended.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

Find me a social event that doesn't involve loud music, dancing and alcohol. I broadened my social horizons fine without them.

How very swell for you. If you didn't mind wasting your money, whatever turns you on.

(I'm also trying to recall our mixers that had loud music or dancing - that was the bar, not the mixer.)

[Leslie Anne]

Hmm. On my campus mixers (or what we called desserts) always had loud music and dancing. No one danced at the bars.

It's interesting to find out how different campus cultures vary.

[lucgreek]

Originally Posted by 33girl

That's lame. Period. No wonder we have an issue with lifetime membership, if people aren't even doing the most fun parts of being in a GLO while they're still in school.

Mixers were fun, but when you're 21/22 and in a big city, they're not as fun as they once were when you're underage. Though if you had quite a few friends in a certain sorority/fraternity, you never missed those mixers ever.

[angels&angles]

Attendance got more hit-or-miss at mixers as upperclassmen, but it had more to do with work than not wanting to go. The main thing I noticed was that as we got older, our cotumes got more elaborate and less slutty.

NB: This was in a tiny college town with 1.5 bars (there were two bars but one was AWFUL) so without Greek Life, there wasn't a lot to do.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by 33girl

How very swell for you. If you didn't mind wasting your money, whatever turns you on.

(I'm also trying to recall our mixers that had loud music or dancing - that was the bar, not the mixer.)

You have quite the perspective problem if parties are why you think I spent my money on dues. I didn't waste a dime. And way to avoid the part of my comment that was the most relevant.

Our switches/date dashes/crush parties were always at bars - rented out space with wristbands and cash bar- and had a DJ and dancing.

Originally Posted by Leslie Anne

Hmm. On my campus mixers (or what we called desserts) always had loud music and dancing. No one danced at the bars.

It's interesting to find out how different campus cultures vary.

Indeed

Originally Posted by lucgreek

Mixers were fun, but when you're 21/22 and in a big city, they're not as fun as they once were when you're underage. Though if you had quite a few friends in a certain sorority/fraternity, you never missed those mixers ever.

Originally Posted by angels&angles

Attendance got more hit-or-miss at mixers as upperclassmen, but it had more to do with work than not wanting to go. The main thing I noticed was that as we got older, our cotumes got more elaborate and less slutty.

NB: This was in a tiny college town with 1.5 bars (there were two bars but one was AWFUL) so without Greek Life, there wasn't a lot to do.

It's a combination of these two, some people just wanted to do other things, but most had coursework and clinical/practicum/lab requirements that took up a lot of their time.

[VandalSquirrel]

I'm more familiar with a swap, mixer, or social having no alcohol, and after the official ending there was alcohol. That was often a result of alcohol policies of sororities, and of some fraternities. Let's say there's a pumpkin carving party, booze free, then people either go to the bar or to an off campus member house so underage people can drink. I think if there was alcohol at an event it was in a house that wasn't dry, or was held off campus with a 3rd party vendor, and was labeled a dance.

We have a decent bar scene so the underage people usually drank in a house or at an out of house, and of age people might be there briefly but peaced out to the bar and show up for late night. I heart late nights in a house because there were always amazing left overs, mmm tater tot casserole or everything for nachos after a night of 32 oz tubs of beer. I can't think of any men's chapter house that didn't have 24 hour kitchen access, ladies, we are mostly denied the kitchen and had to take chances with leftovers and the microwave. Lots of great memories happened after 2 am with board games, karaoke, and pranking.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

Once 40 hours of your week minimum is gone to school stuff, Wednesday night doesn't sound like such a fun time to go out and party.

When I was in law school, the law school library pretty much emptied around 8:30 on Wednesday nights because everyone went to a particular bar in town. Wednesday night there was "Law School Night."

Most productive night of the week, as far as I was concerned.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

When I was in law school, the law school library pretty much emptied around 8:30 on Wednesday nights because everyone went to a particular bar in town. Wednesday night there was "Law School Night."

Most productive night of the week, as far as I was concerned.

Ha! I think it was Thursdays that were Penny Pitchers nights at the bar across the street from campus. But even going to the bar with friends (and sisters/brothers) isn't the same as getting dressed up for a switch and then since they were off campus, being stuck there until the buses started going back around midnight.

Campus/city culture varies a lot, but it does seem like seniors being less involved in the partying is fairly common.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

You have quite the perspective problem if parties are why you think I spent my money on dues. I didn't waste a dime. And way to avoid the part of my comment that was the most relevant.

*headdesk*

I think that ANYONE who does not participate in ALL the facets of Greek membership is wasting their money. That goes for mixers, meetings, philanthropies, ritual, everything.

And as far as the "relevant" part of your post - I guess that was the part about studying? - sorry, but I also think that's a lame excuse. What happened to Greek life teaching us time management?

[ASTalumna06]

Originally Posted by VandalSquirrel

We have a decent bar scene so the underage people usually drank in a house or at an out of house, and of age people might be there briefly but peaced out to the bar and show up for late night. I heart late nights in a house because there were always amazing left overs, mmm tater tot casserole or everything for nachos after a night of 32 oz tubs of beer. I can't think of any men's chapter house that didn't have 24 hour kitchen access, ladies, we are mostly denied the kitchen and had to take chances with leftovers and the microwave. Lots of great memories happened after 2 am with board games, karaoke, and pranking.

Mmm... Stove Top stuffing at the Delta Chi house at 3am...

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by 33girl

*headdesk*

I think that ANYONE who does not participate in ALL the facets of Greek membership is wasting their money. That goes for mixers, meetings, philanthropies, ritual, everything.

And as far as the "relevant" part of your post - I guess that was the part about studying? - sorry, but I also think that's a lame excuse. What happened to Greek life teaching us time management?

YMMV, had our mixers not been loud, alcohol infused dance parties I might have gone to more of them. It seems silly to say that I, or anyone, missed out because I don't like to dance. That wasn't a reason why I joined, so I couldn't have wasted any money. And yet, somehow, I remained active every semester.

And feel free to tell the sisters I knew who were engineering students or nurses that they weren't managing their time well. They were seniors, not freshmen, and very familiar with the program. It's more than just "studying." Seriously, that's just ignorance.

[33girl]

I just have never understood the concept of joining ANY group (that includes a country club or anything where you pay dues) and only doing a few of the things involved with it. We had a few sisters who only went to weekly meetings, rush and ritual. They made very few close friends in the sorority, and yet they kept on paying their dues. I guess I just don't see the point, but then, I was raised by Depression-era parents who impressed upon me that if you buy something, you use it thoroughly and use it until it's gone. Memberships included.

As far as nursing students, if they were in a clinical program, wasn't there a professional status/lowered dues option? Ditto engineering students, if they were in a co-op or something similar.

Sorry your mixers sucked from your POV, but again, if I had rushed at a school where a big facet of Greek life was something I didn't enjoy in the least and didn't plan to participate in, I probably would not have joined. I would have felt too guilty about wasting the money.

[DrPhil]

LOL. 33girl, having Depression-Era parents doesn't make or break this discussion. That's just how your parents raised you and how you applied it to your GLO membership.

Members have different personalities and preferences. Every chapter has at least 1 person who doesn't want to do the EXTRA things that other chapter members want to do. Some people do these things anyway to build a bond and/or shut everyone up. Some people do not. My chapter had at least one Soror on every Line who did not like to attend social events. It was baffling at first but we understood that different personalities and preferences are a part of the Sisterhood. The Soror would only get told about herself if she tried to act like she was holier than thou. As for our own chapter's social events, Sorors knew that hating to dance or hating loud music doesn't keep them from collecting money at the front desk for a few hours or organizing the event in some other capacity.

And years after college, we're all still very close and no one gives a damn whether the Soror liked to attend social events in college or not. A few of them didn't begin attending social events until we were all in alumnae chapters. The collegiate events just annoyed them.

[33girl]

So many things like that are baffling to me...like the dorks around here who live in a suburb and act like crossing the bridge to downtown or the college area is like being Laura Ingalls crossing the prairie. They'd rather stay in their closed little hamlet with the same old people they've known since birth. I mean, if they really want to live like that, they can move to my old hometown and pay hella lower property taxes.

For the most part...the women who didn't socialize in college...are still the women who don't like to socialize very much. I know it takes all kinds to make a world and that, but it still baffles me.