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03-01-2010, 04:07 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2005
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Quote:
Originally Posted by acedawg00-02
Male or female...I'm not here to take sides...but I think that most people have a problem with the truth...
And the truth is...
If you are going to conduct yourself as if you have no self-respect, integrity...morals or values...get the f*** out of the relationship - don't drag others down with you!! Not only do you run the risk of causing great emotional damage and humiliation (as seen in this case)....but you also run the risk of exposing your partner to a number of STD's or even HIV/AIDS.
In my opinion, a coward is one who chooses not be be honest and commits infidelity - the sh*t is totally unacceptable.
I will agree that this situation could have been handled in a more mature fashion...but I do believe that in order to get respect, you must first give it...and this young lady lacked decency and respect on all levels.
I have no sorrow or sympathy for her, nor anyone else who cheats.
Whether it's a football player who ends up murdered b/c he forgets that he has a wife and children at home, or a politician who is publicly humiliated b/c he chooses to cheat on his terminally ill wife. Evil begets evil...
If you play a sick and disgusting game - expect sick and disgusting results.
As my grandmother used to say about lies and manipulation - "the only person you're fooling is yourself."
It's sad to say...but there are so many of us who think that we're exempt...and probably will not stop until we're caught...or until someone walks the dog on our a$$.
Karma is a b****...treat people the way you want to be treated.
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I have to say, I pretty much agree with everything you said.
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03-01-2010, 05:25 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 16,133
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Quote:
Originally Posted by acedawg00-02
Male or female...I'm not here to take sides...but I think that most people have a problem with the truth...
And the truth is...
If you are going to conduct yourself as if you have no self-respect, integrity...morals or values...get the f*** out of the relationship - don't drag others down with you!! Not only do you run the risk of causing great emotional damage and humiliation (as seen in this case)....but you also run the risk of exposing your partner to a number of STD's or even HIV/AIDS.
In my opinion, a coward is one who chooses not be be honest and commits infidelity - that sh*t is weak, and totally unacceptable.
I will agree that this situation could have been handled in a more mature fashion...but I do believe that in order to get respect, you must first give it...and this young lady lacked decency and respect on all levels.
I have no sorrow or sympathy for her, nor anyone else who cheats.
Whether it's a football player who ends up murdered b/c he forgets that he has a wife and children at home, or a politician who is publicly humiliated b/c he chooses to cheat on his terminally ill wife.
Evil begets evil...and if you play a sick and disgusting game - expect sick and disgusting results.
There is one thing that my grandmother used to say about lies and manipulation - "the only person you're fooling is yourself."
It's sad to say...but there are so many of us who think that we're exempt...and probably will not stop until we're caught...or until someone walks the dog on our a$$.
Karma is a b****...remember to treat people the way you want to be treated.
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THIS
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Phi Sigma Biological Sciences Honor Society “Daisies that bring you joy are better than roses that bring you sorrow. If I had my life to live over, I'd pick more Daisies!”
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03-02-2010, 12:22 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2006
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I still say the whole thing is crass and uncouth. But, I come from a more civilized era, where a breakup was handled privately and with discretion. There wasn't a venue or market for this type of trash.
Having 3 sons, if one of them pulled this stunt, I would not only be disappointed in him, but I would question where my parenting went wrong.
Break up with the cheating wench - YES, absolutely! But it's much better to emerge from the whole fiasco the "better person", not the sensationalistic scumbag who people are talking about publicly and on national websites and airwaves.
Will he be proud to have his children hear that performance in a few years? I don't think so.
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03-02-2010, 01:10 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Florida
Posts: 124
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I think that discussions like this are great...and we're all entitled to our opinion...however...
It's quite obvious that this young lady wasn't too concerned about privacy and discretion when she PUBLICLY disrespected herself, her partner and her relationship.
People have grown tired of having to remain silent when it comes to abusive relationships, cheating and betrayal...and I'm not sure as to why you're so moved to call the young man a "scumbag" b/c had she NOT conducted herself in such a manner, there would be nothing to discuss.
In my humble opinion, she got what she deserved...and considering the fact that she continued to lie and cheat after finding the ring . . . and still, arrogantly, expected a proposal -it should have been 10X's worse.
Some people have lost their lives behind such irresponsible behavior. If I'm correct, the ex-wife of a Texas dentist is serving a 10 year prison sentence for running over her cheating husband three times with a car. Others have even experienced the pain of hot oil or grits on their skin (ask Al Green).
I'm definitely not in favor of violence, but there is no telling what a person will do until they're in a particular situation.
Again, whether it's a male or female, people are fed up and tired of "turning the other cheek."
I'm reminded of an old saying, "don't start no mess and there won't be no mess."
We all have a breaking/snapping point - and sometimes it's just best not to be stupid enough to test it.
Perhaps we should just bring back the stockades...LOL!
Anyway, my point remains...treat others the way in which you want to be treated...it's quite simple.
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"It is far better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."
Last edited by acedawg00-02; 03-03-2010 at 02:00 AM.
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03-03-2010, 01:25 AM
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Join Date: May 2007
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Cold!
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She's cold-blooded like a mammal!"---some idiot I met
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03-03-2010, 12:22 PM
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Quote:
It's quite obvious that this young lady wasn't too concerned about privacy and discretion when she PUBLICLY disrespected herself, her partner and her relationship.
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There is a huge difference between being seen kissing an old boyfriend in a bar by a friend of your boyfriend's and airing the entire sad event on radio.
If you listen to the broadcast, it's not clear WHAT she actually did other than kiss the guy, which, YES constitutes cheating, but IMO, does not constitute public humiliation and cruelty. She even tearfully says that she made a mistake. Wouldn't this confession and sorrow be better handled privately between the two?
If she had had sex in, say, a public venue and it had been taped and broadcast on youtube, then YES, publicly humiliate her because she has brought the thing to the public. But, from the recording, this doesn't seem to be the case - nor is there any indication that it was some on-going affair.
I just don't think these shock jock public humiliations are not a heatlhy thing in any way, and I wish the "market" for them was less, because IMO, it doesn't say much for the American public if hearing someone's private pain and agony aired to God knows whoever is entertaining. I think it is sick and sadistic.
Also, having been through alot of life and having seen many things - the "kissing" event over the length of a long relationship and marriage can be something that can be discussed, worked through and actually even strenghten the marriage. I've seen worse things gotten over, but this guy, who had spent 5 years in love with this woman, who seemingly loved him back, despite the indiscretion, has blown any chance he had to make things right. She certainly doesn't sound like a woman who didn't care.
Another thing, I believe that sometimes admitting to an indiscretion or mistake can be MORE harmful and actually MORE selfish than keeping it to yourself - sometimes, the, "I can't live with the guilt, so I had to tell you." is actually more painful to the other person, and as long as the indiscretion truly was a MISTAKE, not to be repeated, it is kinder to move on and not hurt your partner.
But, like I said, I've seen alot - I've been married for 25 years (thankfully never been in this situation) but I have plenty of friends who have and I've seen it go both ways.
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03-03-2010, 01:34 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Florida
Posts: 124
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There is a huge difference between being seen kissing an old boyfriend in a bar by a friend of your boyfriend's and airing the entire sad event on radio.
Honestly, there is no difference between the two...both are unacceptable. And once again, if she had a modicum of decency and self-respect, she would NOT have put herself in that position in the first place. She was in a relationship...not playing a kindergarten game of "play-house."
I think we all have made mistakes...but repeatedly? When do you grow the hell up? You're not only playing with someone's emotions but you're using their finances, their time...and playing a dangerous game with their life/health!!
...but this guy, who had spent 5 years in love with this woman, who seemingly loved him back, despite the indiscretion, has blown any chance he had to make things right.
Not trying to be funny, but this is slightly laughable. Who's to say that he wants her back in his life? Are you aware of the number of good, self-respecting, and honest women out there...who are willing to do right by their mate? I'm quite sure that this guy doesn't live under a rock...he doesn't have to settle.
I think that she blew any chances when she: A)cheated B) still couldn't even come clean when asked. "The best lessons in life, are the ones you pay for..." and hopefully she learned from this.
Still, no one has to take that crap...unless they have some serious self-esteem issues.
I tell most of my female friends..."if he's cheating and has no respect or appreciation for you, there's someone out there who will do right by you." And yes, it's sometimes easier said than done..
This young man will meet someone who will do right by him.
It's about knowing your worth, your value and loving yourself.
Ask yourself, "would I treat myself this way?"
If not, tell 'em to pack their bags and leave the key on the counter.
I love you, baby...but you gotta take that stress and drama somewhere else...
LOL!!
__________________
"It is far better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."
Last edited by acedawg00-02; 03-03-2010 at 02:12 PM.
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03-03-2010, 02:04 PM
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I have to say that I agree with srmom. The tramp deserved to be dumped, but on the radio? He lost the high road when he turned to the radio.
FYI, an accident somewhat similar to this happened on the radio station I listen to. The station was later sued - and lost - but I forget what grounds the plantiff used. We have some crazy laws, though.
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03-03-2010, 02:21 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Florida
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I agree that both actions were unacceptable as well - I even stated that in my last post.
"Whatever one sows, that will he also reap." Not my words...I think they come from Galations 6:7.
Again, if you treat people right from jump...you should have nothing to worry about - no pain...no shame.
__________________
"It is far better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."
Last edited by acedawg00-02; 03-03-2010 at 02:55 PM.
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03-03-2010, 05:06 PM
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I'm with srmom and honey. The couple's business should've remained private. I felt guilty just listening to the clip.
Quote:
Originally Posted by acedawg00-02
"Whatever one sows, that will he also reap." Not my words...I think they come from Galations 6:7.
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I'm pretty sure Paul's message in Galations is not about revenge. It's a good principle that comes from Galations 6:7; I think our dumper would benefit from reading it. It might inspire him to consider whether he really wants to sow seeds of mean-spirited retaliation.
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Never let the facts stand in the way of a good answer. -Tom Magliozzi
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03-03-2010, 04:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by honeychile
I have to say that I agree with srmom. The tramp deserved to be dumped, but on the radio? He lost the high road when he turned to the radio.
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Exactly. I've been in a potentially abusive relationship; I've also been cheated on. That said, I understand the base urge to expose the person for being a terrible person who did a very hurtful thing. On the other hand, I know that my name and/or face would be tied to the public exposure of those actions as well. (Case in point: the woman who dated the Oracle guy and put billboards up about their relationship.) The best thing to do is end all contact with the person, pick yourself up, and start all over again.
The pain of most breakups, no matter how terrible the relationship was, usually goes away quicker than you think. Being connected to something like this won't go away any time soon--for either party.
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03-03-2010, 04:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by srmom
Also, having been through alot of life and having seen many things - the "kissing" event over the length of a long relationship and marriage can be something that can be discussed, worked through and actually even strenghten the marriage.
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This is subjective. I wouldn't need to discuss it, IF we lived together I'd get my stuff and be gone before they make it home. There would be no working through it nor would there be a relationship to strengthen. I have no tolerance for that.
I don't agree with the way that the guy handled things (I didn't laugh either), I do agree with what Acedawg said about not knowing how the other person will react if/when they find out you cheated. Err on the side of caution.
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03-03-2010, 02:23 PM
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If you have to say "but" then you really don't believe they were both unacceptable.
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03-03-2010, 02:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Senusret I
If you have to say "but" then you really don't believe they were both unacceptable.
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Thanks for catching the typo...
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"It is far better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."
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03-03-2010, 03:00 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: but I am le tired...
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Wooooooooow... all 4 of the people in that clip are douchebags.
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