HELP! terrible alumni relations!! need ideas!

[chopperdude]

why do alums have to come down and try to tell us how to run the chapter. who are they to tell us.

[knight_shadow]

Originally Posted by chopperdude

why do alums have to come down and try to tell us how to run the chapter. who are they to tell us.

Didn't you initiate 413 years ago?

[Psi U MC Vito]

Originally Posted by chopperdude

why do alums have to come down and try to tell us how to run the chapter. who are they to tell us.

Your brothers with a crap load of collective experience? Almost all organizations I know of the undergrads run the show with alum providing advice.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Psi U MC Vito

Your brothers with a crap load of collective experience? Almost all organizations I know of the undergrads run the show with alum providing advice.

dont pay attention it's tom tryng to be a new front person username.

[Psi U MC Vito]

I know it's Tom. Didn't you see me call him out in the CoA thread? But even though it is Tom, there are quite a few people who feel that way.

[OPhiAGinger]

Originally Posted by 33girl

OK, let me make this as simple and rudimentary as I can POSSIBLY make it.

Annie Alumna gets a communication from her collegiate chapter that an alumnae tea is coming up. Fine. Annie asks if any other alums from her era are attending, and lo and behold, several are. Annie gets to the tea, and not only does she only talk to the women she knows and ignore the collegians and alumnae older or younger than her who are trying their hardest to engage her, she confronts Allison Alumna about stealing her boyfriend 10 years ago. She also confronts the chapter about "why they aren't as good as they used to be."

I do not think this is a "wacko" conclusion, more that you are willfully misunderstanding what I'm saying. If the ONLY reason you are going back to your campus is to see people you already know - don't friggin' bother!! Yes that can be part of it, but as someone who has had chapter alums who WORKED ON CAMPUS completely ignore the chapter because it's "changed so much" - trust me, no one needs that kind of alumna around.

And if the only reason you invite alums back is to do a needed ritual, it's a better idea to invite those who are geographically the closest, rather than those just from that collegiate chapter. Ritual is ritual. It's supposed to the "bonding" thing for all chapters, so who cares what chapter the alums are from?

Incidentally, I'm talking about NPC groups, and you are talking about a service sorority. The way you form bonds is different, and I think you're comparing apples and oranges. If you ask someone to come up for a service project, that makes sense - your primary focus is service. That's how you've bonded in the past. However, if a sister just asked me to come up to pour chili at the chili feed or whatever, after no communications in years, I think I'd be a little irritated.

Ahhh!! All is clear now. The part that threw me is the bold part of your post, which came out of your own head. I never suggested that the hypothetical alumna should ignore or disrespect the other sisters, whether they be alumnae or collegians. And she certainly shouldn't pick petty fights over something that happened long ago!

I think you have a good point with the part I highlighted in blue, though. I was trying to illustrate activities that would underscore the ongoing bond between all sisters regardless of when they pledged. In OPA, that includes service projects and rituals, which I presumed carried over to NPC sororities, too. In addition, you might invite alumnae to help prep for recruitment or spruce up the house.

I would be pretty irritated if my first contact from my old chapter after a long break in communication was just a request for money. But whether your chapter's "break the ice" technique is a shared meal or a more hands-on active project, the point is to re-establish the bonds by inviting alumnae to an activity that best illustrates the shared bond among all sisters.

[OPhiAGinger]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

....many organizations put a lot of emphasis on the chapter never becoming bigger than the organization....

Everyone's busy. But, what I gathered from OPhi's earlier comments is not just being busy/having priorities (who woulda thunk adults have priorities? ) but almost an unwillingness or inability to connect. A specific call to action for the chapter shouldn't come before knowing who you are working with....

I like that concept of the chapter never becoming bigger than the organization. Easier said than done, though, since so many members never meet sisters beyond the boundaries of their own chapter. Still, it's a worthy goal and something my org could improve upon.

As for your other point, the unwillingness to connect made me smile. I have been active on the national level for so long that my bonds with sisters from other chapters far outshadow the ones I formed back in college. My point is and has always been about setting priorities among opportunities in OPA. It's a special treat for me to get to catch up with a dear sister that I served on our national board years ago when our lives were simpler. Those are the invitations that really tug at my heart and motivate me to shift things around! I am not closed off to new relationships -- just very time constrained.

[ole skool]

Originally Posted by chopperdude

why do alums have to come down and try to tell us how to run the chapter. who are they to tell us.

It's this kind of attitude that keeps the chapters in trouble all around the nation. Y'all too hard headed and think you know every *&^ thing when in fact, you really don't know your head from a hole in the ground.

[als463]

Originally Posted by ole skool

It's this kind of attitude that keeps the chapters in trouble all around the nation. Y'all too hard headed and think you know every *&^ thing when in fact, you really don't know your head from a hole in the ground.

Why does a random guy, who never went Greek, come on a greek chat site to make remarks about fraternities and sororities? I think it is weird.

[Psi U MC Vito]

Originally Posted by als463

Why does a random guy, who never went Greek, come on a greek chat site to make remarks about fraternities and sororities? I think it is weird.

Wait. He's not Greek?

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by OPhiAGinger

I like that concept of the chapter never becoming bigger than the organization. Easier said than done, though, since so many members never meet sisters beyond the boundaries of their own chapter. Still, it's a worthy goal and something my org could improve upon.

It's all about how you are brought in. It isn't "easier said than done" for organizations that frown upon members not interacting with members outside of their chapter.

Most NPHCers learn that your chapter of initiation is GREAT (and shouldn't be completely abandoned, even as an alum) but you suck if your chapter will be/is your only interaction and endeavor as a member.

Originally Posted by OPhiAGinger

As for your other point, the unwillingness to connect made me smile. I have been active on the national level for so long that my bonds with sisters from other chapters far outshadow the ones I formed back in college. My point is and has always been about setting priorities among opportunities in OPA. It's a special treat for me to get to catch up with a dear sister that I served on our national board years ago when our lives were simpler. Those are the invitations that really tug at my heart and motivate me to shift things around! I am not closed off to new relationships -- just very time constrained.

Thanks for more descriptively expressing your point. Got it now.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by OPhiAGinger

I like that concept of the chapter never becoming bigger than the organization. Easier said than done, though, since so many members never meet sisters beyond the boundaries of their own chapter. Still, it's a worthy goal and something my org could improve upon.

Originally Posted by DrPhil

It's all about how you are brought in. It isn't "easier said than done" for organizations that frown upon members not interacting with members outside of their chapter.

Exactly. For example, even at the collegiate level, we encourage lots of interaction among chapters in the same province, so that even before you become an alum, you regularly experience the fraternity as bigger than your own chapter.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

Exactly. For example, even at the collegiate level, we encourage lots of interaction among chapters in the same province, so that even before you become an alum, you regularly experience the fraternity as bigger than your own chapter.

You mean XYZ exists outside of this campus and we all share things in common?! OMG!

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

You mean XYZ exists outside of this campus and we all share things in common?! OMG!

Try to contain your shockment, but yes, 'tis true.