HELP! terrible alumni relations!! need ideas!

[33girl]

OK, let me make this as simple and rudimentary as I can POSSIBLY make it.

Annie Alumna gets a communication from her collegiate chapter that an alumnae tea is coming up. Fine. Annie asks if any other alums from her era are attending, and lo and behold, several are. Annie gets to the tea, and not only does she only talk to the women she knows and ignore the collegians and alumnae older or younger than her who are trying their hardest to engage her, she confronts Allison Alumna about stealing her boyfriend 10 years ago. She also confronts the chapter about "why they aren't as good as they used to be."

I do not think this is a "wacko" conclusion, more that you are willfully misunderstanding what I'm saying. If the ONLY reason you are going back to your campus is to see people you already know - don't friggin' bother!! Yes that can be part of it, but as someone who has had chapter alums who WORKED ON CAMPUS completely ignore the chapter because it's "changed so much" - trust me, no one needs that kind of alumna around.

And if the only reason you invite alums back is to do a needed ritual, it's a better idea to invite those who are geographically the closest, rather than those just from that collegiate chapter. Ritual is ritual. It's supposed to the "bonding" thing for all chapters, so who cares what chapter the alums are from?

Incidentally, I'm talking about NPC groups, and you are talking about a service sorority. The way you form bonds is different, and I think you're comparing apples and oranges. If you ask someone to come up for a service project, that makes sense - your primary focus is service. That's how you've bonded in the past. However, if a sister just asked me to come up to pour chili at the chili feed or whatever, after no communications in years, I think I'd be a little irritated.

[OPhiAGinger]

Originally Posted by 33girl

OK, let me make this as simple and rudimentary as I can POSSIBLY make it.

Annie Alumna gets a communication from her collegiate chapter that an alumnae tea is coming up. Fine. Annie asks if any other alums from her era are attending, and lo and behold, several are. Annie gets to the tea, and not only does she only talk to the women she knows and ignore the collegians and alumnae older or younger than her who are trying their hardest to engage her, she confronts Allison Alumna about stealing her boyfriend 10 years ago. She also confronts the chapter about "why they aren't as good as they used to be."

I do not think this is a "wacko" conclusion, more that you are willfully misunderstanding what I'm saying. If the ONLY reason you are going back to your campus is to see people you already know - don't friggin' bother!! Yes that can be part of it, but as someone who has had chapter alums who WORKED ON CAMPUS completely ignore the chapter because it's "changed so much" - trust me, no one needs that kind of alumna around.

And if the only reason you invite alums back is to do a needed ritual, it's a better idea to invite those who are geographically the closest, rather than those just from that collegiate chapter. Ritual is ritual. It's supposed to the "bonding" thing for all chapters, so who cares what chapter the alums are from?

Incidentally, I'm talking about NPC groups, and you are talking about a service sorority. The way you form bonds is different, and I think you're comparing apples and oranges. If you ask someone to come up for a service project, that makes sense - your primary focus is service. That's how you've bonded in the past. However, if a sister just asked me to come up to pour chili at the chili feed or whatever, after no communications in years, I think I'd be a little irritated.

Ahhh!! All is clear now. The part that threw me is the bold part of your post, which came out of your own head. I never suggested that the hypothetical alumna should ignore or disrespect the other sisters, whether they be alumnae or collegians. And she certainly shouldn't pick petty fights over something that happened long ago!

I think you have a good point with the part I highlighted in blue, though. I was trying to illustrate activities that would underscore the ongoing bond between all sisters regardless of when they pledged. In OPA, that includes service projects and rituals, which I presumed carried over to NPC sororities, too. In addition, you might invite alumnae to help prep for recruitment or spruce up the house.

I would be pretty irritated if my first contact from my old chapter after a long break in communication was just a request for money. But whether your chapter's "break the ice" technique is a shared meal or a more hands-on active project, the point is to re-establish the bonds by inviting alumnae to an activity that best illustrates the shared bond among all sisters.