RUSH at UCSB - Page 3

Sunny · #1 09-21-2001, 01:06 PM

I got my invites back this morning, and I was dropped by all four houses I was interested in, and subsequently decided to withdraw from rush.

When my rho chi, who's actually in Alpha Phi (I've known since the beginning) told me where I'd been invited back, I was shocked. I'd really felt like I'd hit it off with so many girls and I was so incredible excited to see them again, and I've been hearing nothing but compliments and girls who SEEMED totally enthralled with me. I didn't really expect invites from all four, but I never dreamed this would happen. I think the thing that hurt the most is that I had friends who basically made it their mission in life to convince me to rush their house...so I finally made up my mind, and really got into it, and now this. In a way, I almost feel betrayed. I was told "I can't wait till you're in!" "You better pick my to be your big sis" "Ohmigod, if you rush anywhere else we'll kill you!" and then I got dropped. And I know it's probably because I'm a junior, but it's still very very difficult for me, because I'd gotten my hopes so high. Withdrawing was a very hard choice, but I decided that I wouldn't be happy in any of the houses that did invite me back. I'm thinking about COB, but there's a good chance all houses will make quota...and that doesn't help with the feeling that my friends rejected me...god this sucks..I'm going back to bed.

carnation · #2 09-21-2001, 01:20 PM

Oh Sunny, I feel so bad for you. I also rushed as a junior and I can remember watching freshmen with much lower grades and hardly any activities get tons of invites back just because they were freshmen. Lots of these girls, who pledged what might be termed elite sororities, ended up dropping out of college after one semester.

I don't know what to say. I wish that people wouldn't push their friends to rush, almost guaranteeing them a bid, because in most sororities, only 3 votes can keep a rushee out and when a sorority has to cut down to a certain number, the upperclassmen often suffer.

If you still want to be Greek--and I hope you do!--please talk to your Rho Chi and find out how to get your name on an "available" list so that maybe you can be bid this fall. The big sororities may or may not make quota; we've heard the news plenty of times this rushing season that big-name sororities on certain campuses didn't get quota only because they'd cut too heavily. When this happens, there's usually a mad rush to the Greek Office to find out who's still available!

Take care...many of us on GC have been just where you are and we care.

greeklawgirl · #3 09-21-2001, 01:46 PM

Sunny, I'm so sorry. Keep your chin high. As you know, being an junior sometimes really affects your chances in rush. Not that this comforts you at all, but I'm sure that your sorority friends feel just as badly about it as you do, because they're aware that they got your hopes up.
It's not too late. You can get a snap bid or COB. Don't give up! In the meantime, we care a whole lot about you, and we know what UCSB's Greek system is missing out on.

valkyrie · #4 09-21-2001, 03:00 PM

Oh, Sunny, I am so sorry!! It is clear that you would have been such an asset to one of these houses and I'm sorry that they couldn't see that.

I went through rush as a sophomore, and I got dropped from a good friend's house. I remember meeting her during rush (which was not allowed) and she was in tears over it because it was completely out of her hands -- no matter what she and her friends in the house said, I got cut anyway. Even sophomores didn't make it into that house. What that means is that your friends may well have not rejected you, but for reasons beyond their control you got cut.

Anyway, I hope you're feeling okay. We are all here for you. Hugs!!

mmcat · #5 09-21-2001, 06:57 PM

keep your options open...get on the available list and see what is meant to be. you sound like a terrific girl. don't let it get you.

you were excellent when you started...you are even better now.
cheers and support
mmcat

TechAPhi · #6 09-21-2001, 09:58 PM

Oh sweetie, my heart aches for you. I can only imagine how you must feel. Please know we all at GC support you and know how special you are. Like one of the other ladies said, you were special before and you still are!

We're here for you if you need to chat. Please feel free to message me. Hang in there. Sending hugs to you...

Jen

aggieAXO · #7 09-21-2001, 11:26 PM

I have been reading the posts and have been feeling like I am going through rush with you. I too was a junior when I went through and it was difficult, 2 of my friends also went through and we all had our problems. One of my friends on the last day got cut by 2 of the bigger houses and she only had one house left which luckily had her probably on the first bid list-so she received a bid. I was crosscut (I still have no idea what that means) and was snapped up by AXO-the best thing that could have happened to me

) Going through as a junior is very hard, but this is your last chance and I definitely think you should keep your options open(even if you did not feel at home at some of the other houses, if some of them have snap bids-give them a chance). The way I got a snap bid is my roommate pledged AXO and told the girls I had been crosscut, they called me up and the rest is history. I am soooo glad that I pledged, the only regret is I wish I had joined sooner. Just wanted you to know that I feel for you.

K

shadokat · #8 09-21-2001, 11:32 PM

Sunny--

I am so sorry to hear your story. It's one I've heard too many times. It's such a shame that people would have the nerve to say that if you rushed anywhere else they'd be mad or talked about you being their little sister and all that. I'm sorry, but at my school, saying anything about being someone's little sister is dirty rush. It may not be directly, but are you telling me that saying that sort of thing doesn't lead a girl to believe that she's going to get a bid? Man, the whole thing just makes me mad!!!

I'm sorry you felt you had to withdraw, but like aggieAXO said, this is probably your last chance, and make sure your options are open. You never know who will make quota and who will not, never can tell what rushees are thinking and where they'll go sometimes. Keep your head high sweetie, because you deserve to be happy ((hug))

SparkliiQTMTSU · #9 09-22-2001, 12:04 AM

AWWW I am so sorry to hear that. Maybe you could do informal rush. I hope you are ok. Keep your head up.

Nichole

cutehootie · #10 09-22-2001, 12:42 AM

I'm sorry how things turned out, Sunny. It can be a huge emotional roller coaster. But, you are right to withdraw if you are not comfortable with the choices remaining. You seem like a wonderful girl. Good luck.

Sunny · #11 09-22-2001, 07:50 PM

Well, I tlked to my friends last night....The girls in ADpi felt soooo bad, but they had to drop ALL juniors...right now they have 5 seniors, 30 juniors, and 15 sophmores, so they really need to even things out, which I totally understand. But they'll also be doing COBs no matter what, because they have a lot of room in their house. Then I got a phone call from the girls in A phi, because they thought I dropped their house when I didn't show up. I told them I was not invited back, and they were shocked. They all thought I was on the list. So they talked to the president, who also thought I'd been invited back. The input machine broke the first day, and everything's being put in be hand, which means there's a tiny chance that there was a mistake. So they're checking on it. But talking to them made me feel SO much better, and i'm pretty sure I'll do COB...anyways, just wanted to update you all!
*Becca*

ZTAngel · #12 09-22-2001, 07:53 PM

There are many computer glitches that go on during recruitment. Unfortunately, so many sororities lose great girls because of it! I wish you the best of luck during COB. Be sure to let us know what happens! By the way, when is COB for you?

mmcat · #13 09-22-2001, 07:57 PM

it sounds like you can cob...
do not be shy!
you will be an excellent addition...
sweetheart, keep the options open.
things will work out as they were meant to be.
cheers
mmcat

carnation · #14 09-22-2001, 08:38 PM

Becca, I say go for it! There are so many screwups in rush, many of them computer-related, and I'd just hate it if you denied yourself Greek life because you thought your friends dropped you or that juniors were unwelcome. Stay in there! It's really, really worth it!!!

shadokat · #15 09-23-2001, 12:18 AM

Sunny! I am so happy to hear that your options are still open, and COB is a big possibility. You'll be such a great addition to whatever house you end up in, so keep your head high and smile! Sounds like things got a whole lot better.

As for these computer glitches, that's a shame. I've never done bid matching by computer, as in the north here, we don't have the incredibly large rushes like they do in the south and west. It may take a long time, but the "by hand" invites and bid matching have always worked well

It's a shame in this day and age that technology may mess up a woman's opportunity to be in a sorority. Don't they have any back up on this??