Wedding Votes

[AXJules]

Oh yeah? Well MY sheetcake is going to be in the shape of a vacuum cleaner.
You know, to remind all the unsettled hussies attending to be good housewives someday.

[honeychile]

I've been married once, and am planning a second (once we decided on a city where we'll live!). My own recommendations:

1) Decide what's important to YOU!! If you love flowers, you are not going to be happy with an expensive cake and tacky flowers.

2) If you have friends who do certain things for a living (baker, florist, etc), you may luck out & have one of them give you either the item or a discount for a gift. The downside of that is, you can't be quite as demanding as to what you want that way.

3) Some churches have beautiful social halls, and you can have the reception right there. Of course, that means no alcohol, but that can save you a small fortune, too.

4) Friday night/Sunday weddings are cheaper than Saturdays.

5) Last but not least (from me), there are a gazillion books out there on saving money on a wedding. Find one or two that you're comfortable reading/using, and USE it!!

ps - Congratulations!

pps - Wanted to chime in on the Thank You notes! Smart wedding attendees have the gifts sent to the house prior to the wedding, which means those notes can be written prior to the wedding (but dated the day after). There is NEVER, EVER a good excuse to not have ALL of your wedding thank yous out, unless there is a death of someone VERY close ON the wedding day!!!!

Originally posted by SHEETCAKE
If you are Billy Joel, Elton John, or maybe even Ben Folds, that sheetcake is okay.

Otherwise, SHEETCAKE says no.

How's about ALICIA KEYS? She would appreciate that SHEETCAKE.

[AOIIsilver]

I KNOW this will come across as cheap...BUT, we ordered our wedding cake (for our vow renewal) from Wal-Mart. It was less than $150 and simply stunning. A lady from my church gave us FRESH gardenias from her flower garden to top each layer. We have had SO many compliments on that cake. No one believed that it was from Wal-Mart!

Our vow renewal was small (only 100 attendees), but everyone ate and ate, and we took two of the three cakes home. I could not believe how much cake we got for the money.

<Grin, we also had a chocolate sheetcake!>

For our first wedding, we had a cake decorator to make and bake our cake. It was in the shape of the church where we were married, complete with stained glass windows, interior lighting to show the stained glass, a bell tower, and a staircase with individually hand-painted figurines of all of the wedding party (I had 13 female attendants alone!). It was a rich butter cake with rasberry layers. It was very costly, but awesome. We had 450 attendees for our first wedding.

I argee about the phorographer. Spend the money on the photographer. make sure to ask BEFORE you book a photographer if your family can take snapshots of each pose.

Silver

[vandy_violet]

I don't even have a husband prospect, but if you like planning a hypothetical wedding, TheKnot.com is so fun! I want to get married in October on an off day like maybe a Sunday, Thursday, or Friday.

Things to Spend On:

The entertainment-live jazz band with vocalist; it's very imp't. to have good entertainment

Honeymoon-I'd like to go to Spain, and they have several feast days/festivals in October, I believe

Things to go Moderate On:

The dress-a very pretty, simple sheath with nice fabric, but I'd try to buy from a sample sale like my mom; I just wouldn't feel comfortable in something cheap-I'd even buy any nicely made white gown over a dress with cheap fabric

The reception site-I want something classy that fits with the jazz theme, but decoration make a huge difference, as can using a state building, which should be cheaper

The invitations-Ideally I'd have these gorgeous Crane's ones w/ toile envelope lining...but I'll just pick simple nice thick ivory stock cards w/ a classy font and thermoengraving, and so they'll look simple and elegant

Photography/Video-If I'm dying for a super-complicated video, I'll apply for A Wedding Story; I would get a quality photgrapher for the imp't. parts-ceremony, bride's room beforehand, dances, cake cutting, but since my sister's fav hobby is photography, ask her to take some as well

Things to be conservative on:

The flowers-I want strategically placed nice flowers w/ TONS of votives and the reception centerpieces will have framed calligraphy/old book pages of love poems w/ candles and a sprinkling of flower petals

The cake-I read you can get a really pretty smaller cake for show and then a sheet cake in the same flavor for the guests, so what's the point of making a bigger one you'll cut up?

The ceremony music-My brother plays violin, and he better continue through college b/c I'd like him to play in a small ensemble

The food-I'd like to have good food, but it's not necessary to have four courses with lobster and caviar; I think I'd do what my mom did and go with a nice buffet, or cocktails and a light dinner; I'd have perhaps enough champagne for each guest to have a glass, and maybe a beer, wine, and a few liquors, but w/ a limit for the amt.-I don't think you need to be drunk at the reception

Things we're splurging on:

Photographer - it's the one thing (other than each other!) that we'll have left after the day, so we went for a better package than we might have planned on otherwise

Location - It was really important to me to get married in a particular town (Lake Geneva, WI) because my family has a lot of history there. Unfortunately, it's a huge resort town, and we're getting married during their busy season. Luckily we've been able to get some discounts due to family friends still there, but it's still a little pricey.


Things we're going moderate:

Food - Since we're having an evening reception on a Friday night (well past dinner time) we're having a dessert and hors d'oeuvres (I don't think I spelled that right) reception. It'll come up to about the same money-wise as a cheaper plated dinner, but we'll be able to offer a lot of selection and a lot better quality food than we could have with a sit down dinner. Plus, I don't think many people would want to wait until 9:30 on a Friday night for a cold piece of chicken

Flowers - We're mixing some silk with some fresh... silk for the decorations that no body will be up close and personal with, and fresh for the bouquets, bouteniers, table decorations, etc.

Invitations - We had planned on not going all out on these, but we found some we absolutely loved that were in the mid-range. I'm glad we did now, because I've really noticed that it stands out when you get a low-end invitation. At the same time, it wasn't worth the $4 a piece ones, either

Things we saved on:

My dress: I found my dream dress in the informals section, because it has a sweep train instead of a chapel or longer - perfect for our outdoor wedding. It was actually well under what I had budgeted.

Music: I got a deal on a string quartet through some friends for the ceremony. For the reception, the father of our best man does DJing as a side business and is going to play our reception pretty much for cost.

Cake: Since we're having cocktails and desserts as the main reception focus, we may just cut out the cake alltogether (since Mr. Ginger and I both hate it) and focus more on the other desserts. Otherwise, we'll have a small mockup cake and the dreaded SHEETCAKE

When i planned my wedding ( Now mind you someone on here thinks i am wealthy and i have tolaugh) but:

As for flowers: i am lucky my home church is very beautiful with a lot of greens and floral arrangements so skimping on that was fine. you can get away with pew bows baby breath and agree withsomeone that red roses look good...actually i did that.

Invitations: get the bridal mags and see the flyers postcards for ordering invitations....you can find nice tasteful ones from those catalogs they send you. I ordered mine from those. for the bridal showers and bridemaid luncheons we made those fromt he velum see thru papper and wire ribbon and theme paper froma scrapbook place.


Receiving lines/programs: we did programs and i dont see why since my mother insisted on having a rec line. If you do programs.....they can be done cheaply. do it on yoru own home computer and onthe cover we used an engagement pic ( black and white)

music: find a freinds who sing and play instruments well! i did and they wouldnt charge me vs a string quartet or a full mass choir.
as for reception well i wouldnt skimp on that a DJ or a band either way is a must have.

food: though sit downs are nice it is pricy! buffets are cheaper and sometimes better depends on yoru reception site if they only do the caterering vs. renting a facility where you bring it in.

bridal wear.......i found a bridal outlet store here in so cal and after tonsof other stores not having exactly what i wanted the second dress i tried on at this outlet in monrovia area was the one! and for an outlet price it was $200 and a bridal name brand on it. my viel and headpiece was pricy though for which i bought it at a regular bridal store.
as far as brides maids: JCPenny is good and decent in price.bridal outlets usually carry bridemaids dresses too.

reception sites: dependent on your location. that i coudlnt tell you .

lastly photographers: YOU CANNOT skimp on them! to me i put a lot of money in on that because iw anted the best i could get on them ...but if you shop around you can find good photographers at decent prices