Question for the Fellas...

[teena]

insert vomit smilie here

[ImSoNUPEY]

Gimme a break, I'm a Neo...I'm allowed to be extra for a li'l while lol...

[Senusret I]

I gotta say this....

"Pretty Boy" is definitely not a mindset. I don't care how fresh your haircut is, how crisp your shirts are, or how new your shoes are.

If you look like you were beaten about the face with an ugly bat, being a Kappa won't transform you into a pretty boy. You're just an ugly boy with letters. Or at best, average.

And I'm not picking on the Kappas, there are unattractive people in EVERY organization, including mine. But it irks me to see an organization deem themselves "pretty" and some members just aren't.

It's like AKAs who consider themselves pretty girls...... no, some of you just have high self esteem. Good for you. But there's a difference.

***

On topic.....I am a gay man who is very aware of how I give compliments. I find that when I tell a dude "you look nice today!" in a totally non-threatening way, it goes over well. I am generally referring to an outfit, hairstyle, or whatever. And though everyone knows I'm gay, no one assumes I'm hitting on them. I also give back-handed compliments, too, like was said above "It's about time you got a haircut." It's just my personality.

[nonchalant]

Originally posted by Senusret I
I gotta say this....

"Pretty Boy" is definitely not a mindset. I don't care how fresh your haircut is, how crisp your shirts are, or how new your shoes are.

If you you like you were beaten about the face with an ugly bat, being a Kappa won't transform you into a pretty boy. You're just an ugly boy with letters. Or at best, average.

And I'm not picking on the Kappas, there are unattractive people in EVERY organization, including mine. But it irks me to see an organization deem themselves "pretty" and some members just aren't.

It's like AKAs who consider themselves pretty girls...... no, some of you just have high self esteem. Good for you. But there's a difference.

***

On topic.....I am a gay man who is very aware of how I give compliments. I find that when I tell a dude "you look nice today!" in a totally non-threatening way, it goes over well. I am generally referring to an outfit, hairstyle, or whatever. And though everyone knows I'm gay, no one assumes I'm hitting on them. I also give back-handed compliments, too, like was said above "It's about time you got a haircut." It's just my personality.

WOW!! You make some great points. Great feedback. Now I will rephrase my question to the Kappas. How does a line come out with all pretty boys face wise? Not by clothes, shoes, etc. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Apparently the Kappas selecting the new members behold something beautiful/pretty. Just wondering.


I have also seen some mugly Kappas and AKAs. I think it's good to see a mixture. Keeps down the stereotypes.

[PerfectVerse06]

Originally posted by Senusret I
On topic.....I am a gay man who is very aware of how I give compliments. I find that when I tell a dude "you look nice today!" in a totally non-threatening way, it goes over well. I am generally referring to an outfit, hairstyle, or whatever. And though everyone knows I'm gay, no one assumes I'm hitting on them. I also give back-handed compliments, too, like was said above "It's about time you got a haircut." It's just my personality.

Can I ask you a question? Hopefully this won't come off as offensive...

Do you think your compliments go over well because of the way in which you deliver it or because you are a gay man and people assume you are more aware of how a man looks? I ask this because one of the men I was discussing this with is gay and he argued his point against the heterosexual males we were hanging out with, and the straight males stated that the gay male was able to give another man a compliment because of the fact that he is gay, while everyone else said that it's not a matter of being gay or straight, it's just a matter of being comfortable within yourself as a man to give another man props when he looks good.

We also had a straight male in the group who said there was no problem with him giving another man a compliment. He doesn't gush like females may do, but he just says "Hey man, I know those hazel eyes of yours have the ladies falling all over you!" and most men don't feel uncomfortable with that.

[Senusret I]

Originally posted by PerfectVerse06


Do you think your compliments go over well because of the way in which you deliver it or because you are a gay man and people assume you are more aware of how a man looks?

I honestly never really thought about it....I guess it depends on who receives the compliments. I always assumed people think "Wow, that was nice of Darden" but they might also think "Well, Darden would know."

I'll ask at work tomorrow.

"Hey man, I know those hazel eyes of yours have the ladies falling all over you!" and most men don't feel uncomfortable with that.

Um.....that right there would make me feel uncomfortable, LOL.

[teena]

Originally posted by ImSoNUPEY
Gimme a break, I'm a Neo...I'm allowed to be extra for a li'l while lol...

alright

you pretty rascal, you

[marquise1911]

Originally posted by PerfectVerse06
We also had a straight male in the group who said there was no problem with him giving another man a compliment. He doesn't gush like females may do, but he just says "Hey man, I know those hazel eyes of yours have the ladies falling all over you!" and most men don't feel uncomfortable with that.

Flag on the play!!! For a man to say that would set off every alarm in my heterosexual body. Why??? To say that means you have been staring. Why are you staring at me, let alone looking into my eyes?

I'm sorry if I offended everyone, but I live in Miami. The DL-fobia is deep here. Men will hit on you just like the above sentence and if you're dumb, you won't catch it until he asks you what your plans for dinner are. I once had some dude say, "Nice lips man, I bet the ladies love them." Ask yourself why is another man looking at my lips? Not surprisingly he later asked a co-worker of mine to express to me his interest. I reaffrim my previous statement, especially when addressing body parts, str8 men don't compliment each other like that.

[PerfectVerse06]

Originally posted by marquise1911
Flag on the play!!! For a man to say that would set off every alarm in my heterosexual body. Why??? To say that means you have been staring. Why are you staring at me, let alone looking into my eyes?

I'm sorry if I offended everyone, but I live in Miami. The DL-fobia is deep here. Men will hit on you just like the above sentence and if you're dumb, you won't catch it until he asks you what your plans for dinner are. I once had some dude say, "Nice lips man, I bet the ladies love them." Ask yourself why is another man looking at my lips? Not surprisingly he later asked a co-worker of mine to express to me his interest. I reaffrim my previous statement, especially when addressing body parts, str8 men don't compliment each other like that.

We think this guy may be in a league of his own....

One of his favorite movies is "From Justin to Kelly" starring the winner and runner-up of American Idol LMBO!!!!

[marquise1911]

I beg to differ...
Being Pretty is a mindset. Not just in Kappa, but in the real world. Have you seen the finest women with the most ugliest men. That's because he has a pretty mindset. If you feel good about yourself and have the right outfit you will look like a celeb.

Case in point. The Ace off the last line. He was a complete nerd! Nerd I say. Glasses, bad clothes, and horrible shoes. But while he was persuing membership () people noticed that he changed the game up a little. Spent more time grooming himself, got better clothes, and started speaking out more. By the time he crossed he was a regular Romeo. He had aquired the pretty mindset, which can't be sold in stores nor stolen. Being around suave and klean kut people will make you wanna up your game a little. I've even seen it happen to women who started dating Kappas. They just all of a sudden start dressing better and keeping the hair done up all nice.

[marquise1911]

Originally posted by PerfectVerse06


We think this guy may be in a league of his own....

One of his favorite movies is "From Justin to Kelly" starring the winner and runner-up of American Idol LMBO!!!!

No I wouldn't put it past any man who walks around noticing body parts and compliment the men who own them.

[PerfectVerse06]

Originally posted by Senusret I
I honestly never really thought about it....I guess it depends on who receives the compliments. I always assumed people think "Wow, that was nice of Darden" but they might also think "Well, Darden would know."

I'll ask at work tomorrow.

Okay, cool! It will be interesting to find out what people think of this.

Originally posted by Senusret I
Um.....that right there would make me feel uncomfortable, LOL.

LMBO!!!

The guy 'claims' those sorts of compliments go over well with the fellas, but he could've been lying about that to save face in front of the straight guys in the group. He's confessed a few things to us, and the other guys have used those things to make fun of him, so telling all of us he's cool with complimenting a man that way has just given them more ammo to tease him with.

[Senusret I]

Originally posted by marquise1911
I beg to differ...
Being Pretty is a mindset. Not just in Kappa, but in the real world. Have you seen the finest women with the most ugliest men. That's because he has a pretty mindset. If you feel good about yourself and have the right outfit you will look like a celeb.

Case in point. The Ace off the last line. He was a complete nerd! Nerd I say. Glasses, bad clothes, and horrible shoes. But while he was persuing membership () people noticed that he changed the game up a little. Spent more time grooming himself, got better clothes, and started speaking out more. By the time he crossed he was a regular Romeo. He had aquired the pretty mindset, which can't be sold in stores nor stolen. Being around suave and klean kut people will make you wanna up your game a little. I've even seen it happen to women who started dating Kappas. They just all of a sudden start dressing better and keeping the hair done up all nice.

Nothing you have described makes a man pretty. Stylish, suave, sophisticated -- sure.

Ladies -- is Jay Z pretty?

[marquise1911]

Originally posted by Senusret I
Nothing you have described makes a man pretty. Stylish, suave, sophisticated -- sure.

Ladies -- is Jay Z pretty?

Who can judge what's pretty? It's all in what people perceive. Perception is reality! People perceive prettiness in ALMOST every man in KAPsi.

[Senusret I]

Originally posted by marquise1911
Who can judge what's pretty? It's all in what people perceive. Perception is reality! People perceive prettiness in ALMOST every man in KAPsi.

Dude.... "attractive" is not the same as pretty. I can agree that people can perceive attractiveness in almost anyone.

But "pretty" in a man is a very specific thing that is not synonymous with any traits that can be learned, such as sophistication or stylishness.

I'm not emotionally invested in this debate -- just REALLY wondering when "pretty" became a state of mind. It really, really is not.