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  #16  
Old 08-23-2004, 04:03 PM
BabyP BabyP is offline
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no my man is not muslim - he is Danish/Porteguese like 4th or 5th generation American though. But he said if we do a wedding back home, he would be okay to have it the muslim way. but if we do it here it will be in a garden or in a church - by the way he is a CATHOLIC. I dont know why i end up dating many catholics. OH well, My family back home know he is "American" and they dont care as long as we have wedding back home too and he makes hella good money LOL...... Iran doesnt look down on interracial marriages. Yes technically a muslim woman cant marry a muslim man. A muslim man can marry anyone of the "book" like the bible, torah, etc. cuz they may convert or raise their children muslim. well catholics used to be prohibited to marry non catholic, just find a church or priest that would marry you. Some catholics church you pay them they dont care some require you to be baptised and do a little counseling, etc. But that is a bridge we will cross when we get into it. I am not going to convert into Catholicism. but there is no ring, no engagment or anything, so i think its too soon to talk about all this but unfortunately in ethnic cultures we have to make sure there is no clash cuz if there is then you have to cut the person loose cuz family/traditions/religion are more important (for me).
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  #17  
Old 08-23-2004, 05:22 PM
Taualumna Taualumna is offline
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This has confused me a bit, BabyP, but did you grow up in the US? Because you keep on referring to "back home", which I'm now taking to mean the "old country". For me, I don't call Hong Kong "back home" because I was born and raised in Canada. I do call it the "old country" sometimes though. Anyway, if any Catholic priest has issues with an interfaith couple, you can probably try an Episcopal church. I don't know about the US Episcopal Church, but the Anglican Church of Canada does not require the couple to be Anglican (the US Episcopal Church is part of the Anglican Community). As long as one party is baptized, then it is ok. That means that a Catholic and a Jew can marry in an Anglican church if they choose to! High Anglican services can be very "catholic" too.
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  #18  
Old 08-27-2004, 07:57 PM
BabyP BabyP is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by Taualumna
This has confused me a bit, BabyP, but did you grow up in the US? Because you keep on referring to "back home", which I'm now taking to mean the "old country". For me, I don't call Hong Kong "back home" because I was born and raised in Canada. I do call it the "old country" sometimes though. Anyway, if any Catholic priest has issues with an interfaith couple, you can probably try an Episcopal church. I don't know about the US Episcopal Church, but the Anglican Church of Canada does not require the couple to be Anglican (the US Episcopal Church is part of the Anglican Community). As long as one party is baptized, then it is ok. That means that a Catholic and a Jew can marry in an Anglican church if they choose to! High Anglican services can be very "catholic" too.
I was not born in US but I was raised mostly in Cali. I grew up in a strong cultural home and have that values and tradition instilled in me. Yes I am referring to my country as " back home". Its not really the church that is the issue. its the culture clashes.
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  #19  
Old 08-31-2004, 09:41 AM
_Opi_ _Opi_ is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by AKA_Monet




But to me, it was interesting about the "separation" and the fact that Mosques are ONLY used to worship Allah... I just think that is cool... To me... That is my humble opinion...

No telling what happens in SOME people's Christian churches...

Actually Monet, mosques can be used for community purposes as well. I guess even weddings.

chideltjen,

I don't think it says any where in the Koran or other holy book that a muslim man can influence a non-muslim woman into the religion. She can keep her religion (as long as its one of the religion of the books) and not convert. It depends on what sources your teacher used to come to his/her conclusions.

Last edited by _Opi_; 08-31-2004 at 09:45 AM.
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  #20  
Old 09-01-2004, 01:04 AM
Contessima Contessima is offline
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catholic weddings

actually, interfaith marriages are certainly allowed in roman catholic weddings (since you didn't specify, I'm assuming that's what you meant?), perhaps it was different pre-Vatican II and that's maybe what you're thinking of?? But for the last few decades it is not required for the non- catholic to convert, be baptised, or anything --- however, all couples that get married in the catholic church (interfaith or not) are required to go through a sort of pre-marital counseling. And lots of non-catholic couples who aren't getting married in the church choose to attend some of these weekend retreats because counseling before you get married is just a good idea! And anyway, I know you will get married in your faith and all, but just for the sake of clarification, if you were wanting to get married in the catholic church but were running into difficulties with it being interfaith, being married in an Episcopal chuch is not the same thing! Catholics recognize marriage as a sacrament and every time a member receives a sacrament, they receive grace , an Anglican church or Episcopal church, though the ritual may look the same, is pretty different.

I don't mean to be a know it all, but I am experiencing a reaffirmation in my faith after rejecting it in high school. I tend to get overly excited. *Sorry!*
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  #21  
Old 09-01-2004, 06:04 AM
kddani kddani is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by BabyP
have that values and tradition instilled in me.
I think this is an interesting example of newer generations of "stricter" (for lack of better word) religions/cultures being followed selectively by the newer generations to practice them (same can be said for my own faith- Catholicism). You speak of all of these values and traditions, but then your other posts in D&R are way off base with those values and traditions.
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  #22  
Old 09-01-2004, 11:11 AM
KSig RC KSig RC is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by kddani
I think this is an interesting example of newer generations of "stricter" (for lack of better word) religions/cultures being followed selectively by the newer generations to practice them (same can be said for my own faith- Catholicism). You speak of all of these values and traditions, but then your other posts in D&R are way off base with those values and traditions.
I didn't realize you were such an expert on BabyP's value and traditions.
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  #23  
Old 09-01-2004, 11:21 AM
kddani kddani is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by KSig RC
I didn't realize you were such an expert on BabyP's value and traditions.
Never claimed to be an expert. But it's a very conservative culture. And BabyP doesn't come off as very conservative
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  #24  
Old 09-01-2004, 11:33 AM
Taualumna Taualumna is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by kddani
I think this is an interesting example of newer generations of "stricter" (for lack of better word) religions/cultures being followed selectively by the newer generations to practice them (same can be said for my own faith- Catholicism). You speak of all of these values and traditions, but then your other posts in D&R are way off base with those values and traditions.
I think a lot of first generation Americans or those who came at a very young age tend to live double lives. They are "American" at school or when they're with friends who are not from the "old country" and switch back to traditional values when they are home. My family isn't all that traditional, but I have certainly heard of people who are like that.
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  #25  
Old 09-01-2004, 11:51 AM
_Opi_ _Opi_ is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by Taualumna
I think a lot of first generation Americans or those who came at a very young age tend to live double lives.

You stole the words right out of my mouth --well fingers.

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  #26  
Old 09-01-2004, 11:56 AM
KSig RC KSig RC is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by kddani
Never claimed to be an expert. But it's a very conservative culture. And BabyP doesn't come off as very conservative

I'm not comfortable w/ making either of those observations, even from my ivory tower.
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  #27  
Old 09-01-2004, 12:32 PM
kddani kddani is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by KSig RC
I'm not comfortable w/ making either of those observations, even from my ivory tower.
Well good for you
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  #28  
Old 09-01-2004, 12:36 PM
wrigley wrigley is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by Taualumna
I think a lot of first generation Americans or those who came at a very young age tend to live double lives. They are "American" at school or when they're with friends who are not from the "old country" and switch back to traditional values when they are home. My family isn't all that traditional, but I have certainly heard of people who are like that.

Well said.
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  #29  
Old 09-01-2004, 01:23 PM
winneythepooh7 winneythepooh7 is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by Taualumna
I think a lot of first generation Americans or those who came at a very young age tend to live double lives. They are "American" at school or when they're with friends who are not from the "old country" and switch back to traditional values when they are home. My family isn't all that traditional, but I have certainly heard of people who are like that.
I agree. Also as "Americans" we often stereotype other cultural groups and think they do/do not have problems. The biggest reason for this is often because other cultures are "closed groups" and we don't see what happens behind "closed doors" in that particular community.

To start the fire going even more, I have friends, "for example" who live in "traditionally Jewish, conservative, affluent households". However, the teenagers have many issues when it comes to sexuality and experimentation. I started a thread related to this back in the spring about teens and young children having sex. I think culture, values, and personal choices & behaviors are completely different things. I also think certain people on GC are being overly critical and judgmental and they should step back and look at how their "behavior" and comments reflects upon THEM in a negative sense.
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  #30  
Old 09-01-2004, 02:43 PM
KSig RC KSig RC is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by kddani
Well good for you

ok - i'll go into slightly more detail:

1 - why did you even bring up this line of questioning, counselor? it seems like you're basically calling the poor girl a whore and insinuating that she doesn't live up to her cultural values, then trying to cover it up by saying "this seems common" - how banal. I really don't think it's completely appropriate to single her out for this, when one of the MAJOR themes of the dating/romance subforum is sex and gross sexuality. She's just 'playing the game' - but maybe not as well?

2 - You yourself said you know very little about her cultural background - we realistically know less about her actual life, so interpolating as we have from point number one seems a little intense, if not fallacious.



So yeah - not to be a dick, but I think you're out of line here dani. blah blah stones/glass houses blah blah, word up and take it easy.

-RC
--yeah sorta bored
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