Sisterfrinds...What would you do? - Page 2

AKA2D '91 · #1 03-05-2001, 07:42 PM

SHALOM,

please excuse me! I hit the wrong icon. I was trying to respond to your comment. If you can remember, please edit your message to include your original statement...AGAIN I APOLOGIZE! (BLAME IT ON ME APPROACHING 30..LOL)

Shalom2U · #2 03-06-2001, 01:29 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by AKA2D '91:
SHALOM,
please excuse me! I hit the wrong icon. I was trying to respond to your comment. If you can remember, please edit your message to include your original statement...AGAIN I APOLOGIZE! (BLAME IT ON ME APPROACHING 30..LOL)

Shalom AKA2D '91~

Please, no apology needed.

No, I don't remember what I was talking about...and you know me...I'm still trying to figure out how to post correctly...so we'll leave my comment with your ending...besides, I like the Smilies Legend face on your editing anyway!

Shalom~

PS...My UserName is Shalom2U. The UserName Shalom has already been taken by a Distinguish Lady of the Delta Sigma Theta Sorority...I found that out after reading GreekChat a few days ago...it's amazing how much stuff you learn from just one night of insomnia!

Shalom2U · #3 03-06-2001, 01:49 AM

AKA2D '91,

Please accept my humble apology to you for posting after myself "again".
After going back and reading the topic from the genesis, I realized what you were talking about. I hope everyone reading these post don't come to the conclusion that I am like "DUH"...I apology if I've been talking, writing, and posting more then my share lately. I just enjoy the LOVE up in here!

My comment went something like this (I don't remember it word for word because it was from my heart and not from a piece of paper)...

Shalom MarvyG~

I really liked your idea of a three day retreat/lock in. Because while we were there I would fast (no, we would fast) while we participated in the activies you brillently planned. Afterwards, we would break the fast together with Sunday Bunch, Service and Worship!

***This was a good exercise for many relationship situations AKA2D '91...Thanks!

PS. Did I do good Teacher? (in my lst Grade voice).

Shalom~

AKA2D '91 · #4 03-06-2001, 05:23 PM

yes, SHALOM2U...

you did an EXCELLENT job. I am so PROUD of you!

(you may return to your seat!)

AKA2D '91 · #5 03-11-2001, 06:24 PM

I know that's not IT! That's not all who will respond! Thanks to those who have.

Of ALL the people who claim they want to be in someone's ORGANIZATION only a handful had the nerve to respond?

I mean, dang, do you all think that coming into anyone's organization is EASY? that everything is going to be a bed of roses? all hunky dorey and peach keen? NOT !

The point here was for you to get into this situation and try to rectify it. Was that sooooo hard to ask?

I tell ya! Becoming a member of ANY organization is NOT ONLY about what T-shirt/outfit we will wear at XYZ's party or step show? There are REAL dilemas that we face! This hypothetical situation, could be real for you ONE DAY!

So, how are you gonna handle it?
FROM THE LOOKS OF IT, you won't. You'll just become INACTIVE, IF you become a member or before that, you may DROP!

[This message has been edited by AKA2D '91 (edited March 11, 2001).]

exquizit · #6 03-11-2001, 08:40 PM

I remember you asking all the members to give the sisterfriends a chance to respond....Since it seems the ones that were going to answer have done so, Can members give us insight on how they would handle the situation?

quietstorm23 · #7 03-11-2001, 09:23 PM

I agree with the post earlier about having a shut in type ordeal. We did that with the ministerial staff at my church and it really helped alot with our bonding with each other and caring for each other on a different level.

12dn94dst · #8 03-11-2001, 10:18 PM

Sister Moderator, if I may...

OK, let's say you have your lemon squeeze, your lock-in, your bitch session or whatever you want to call it and the issue is STILL there? Then what?

SweetestDiva · #9 03-11-2001, 10:41 PM

Hmm... Sometimes nothing will completely remedy the situation, no matter how many lock-ins or extensive conversations you have. Some people are just plain stubborn, and it's something everybody has to deal with. No, there's no guarantee that you will necessarily be bestfriendsforever with all your line sisters, but the important thing to remember is that they are your *sisters*. For that reason you have to treat it like you would that blood family member you can't seem to get along with - be cordial, be civil, and try to stay away from confrontations or arguments that may disrupt the rest of the family. It's just my personal opinion that no matter how much it may seem like a personal failure, sometimes you just have to let things go.

Nubian · #10 03-12-2001, 10:58 AM

If I were in this unfortunate situation, I would create some kind of situation where we were all dependent on one another for basic needs, (food, clothing) that way even if we didn't get along it would encourage interaction and build trust.

I also believe the lock in idead was a good one, because it gives you all time to ensure that you all know the same history and information, and that you all are functioning as one unit.

I have more input on this but for now I'll hush.

Nubian

Conskeeted19 · #11 03-12-2001, 07:22 PM

my line was faced with mcuh tension. there were two particular line sisters who would not agree to anything. they found something wrong with everything. we talked, we screamed, we cried, we talked, we screamed, we cried. oneday an old old old old head walked up to me and said, "baby, tell the girls that yall gone whoop their--- if they don't get it together"

i couldn't believe that she knew about it! (WEAK LINKS WEAK LINKS WEAK LINKS) now i don't advise doing this today! however, we locked up in that room and every last one of us told them that we were going to give them a little sisterly love that they would never forget. well, after that session we were bossom buddies.

we also found out that we could not hide anything from our big sisters. even when we had our secret meetings - they knew!

so to all of you who are aspiring to be a member of a soroity or fraternity, remember that big brother and big sister SEES ALL and KNOWS ALL!

MarvyG · #12 03-13-2001, 04:31 AM

In response to what to do if it doesn't get any better after the lock-ins and stuff, then I think that the line will just have to push hard and work hard together and still try and make everything alright. We can't give up on the one person because she is our line sister and that is not right. We need to bring her in and give her as much love as possible and try to get her to hang out with us for a day or something, maybe we could do some things that were not sorority related also like go shopping so that we can get to know each other a little more personally. As a line we would just have to pull together and stay strong and everything work. Shower the other person w/ love and never give up until we all make it together.

lastpoetnsite · #13 05-11-2001, 01:59 PM

much respect...

*sigh* unfortunately doing the lock ins, the b**tchin sessions, the begging, the pleading may not end the "weak link" situation.

some people refuse to be united. our own communities inside and outside of greek life can attest to that.

a long time ago i posed a similar question to my mother and her sorority sister. she replied some good old fashioned wood would get everyone in shape. of course in these days of MIP this would be an appalling statement.

so what to do?

ultimately maybe its up to the Big Sisters to make the issue much more threatening tha a line sister ever could. the threat of there being no line might bring out the unity in the group. and then again it might not.

if this was a business and there were breakdowns in the group dynamics there would be reviews, probation, then termination of those involved. teaching how a team is supposed to function would seem to be part of the pledging process.

my first instinct would be to politely communicate, my next instinct would be to
not be so polite in my communication, my third instinct would be...well...my line sisters and i would by any means neccessary have to make sure that the "weakest link" was the strongest by the end.

peace

CUTEONE · #14 05-11-2001, 04:03 PM

I WOULD SET UP A BOOT CAMP TYPE OF SITUATION FOR ABOUT 2 OR 3 DAYS, MAYBE LONGER TO GET RID OF THE "CHIP ON THE SHOULDER" AND NASTY ATTITUDES. ALSO TO MAKE EVERYONE DEPEND ON EACH OTHER FOR BASIC SURVIVAL NEEDS LIKE WATER, FOOD, AND TISSUE TO USE THE BATHROOM. I KNOW IT MAY SOUND CORNY, BUT IT CHANGES PEOPLE LIVES FOREVER. I THINK THIS IS THE BEST WAY TO RULE OUT THE FAKERS FROM THE REAL "LINESISTERS".

PeachyDream · #15 10-17-2011, 06:54 PM

I have been a non-registered guest for quite sometime and recently decided to sign up.

Hello!!!

I was doing a little research and had my mind made that I would not post until much later down the road, however, this thread really pulled me in.

I agree with all the previous posters. If the lock-in didn't work, I think I might speak with an existing member of the organization. After all, aren't I striving to call these women my sister? If someone is in a position to give me, us, guidance, I think it is appropiate to seek it after our attempts don't work out.

I appologize for bringing this to the top if there was a more recent thread dedicated to this topic. I tend to work from the begining and have not yet read more recent posts.