Ladies, beware your perfect nice guy - Page 2

AchtungBaby80 · #16 12-07-2003, 07:10 PM

It's these no-bra-wearing, door-opening feminisits who ruined it for the rest of us...men aren't raised to do nice stuff anymore and they act put out if you expect it.

Sorry, sometimes the mouth runs away with me...

Peaches-n-Cream · #17 12-07-2003, 10:33 PM

I have met quite a few decent men who are socially inept and have no idea how to treat a woman like a lady. I have also met "gentlemen" who are not good people. Any day of the week I would choose a good man over a nice guy. Luckily, I am not out there looking anymore.

AGDee · #18 12-07-2003, 10:41 PM

What you want to look for is overall thoughtfulness and not just to you, but to others as well so then you know it's not just "impressing a date" behavior.

I've never judged someone on opening my car door, but if it's raining or snowing and he unlocks his door, gets in, starts the car and you have to knock on the window to get his attention to unlock YOUR door while you're standing out there, we've got a problem (been there!).

But, ladies should keep in mind that courtesy should go both ways. If a man opens my door and lets me in, I always try to open his door from inside the car.

I can't see ever waiting inside the car for him to come around and open it for me, unless the inside handle is broken or something.

Dee

decadence · #19 12-08-2003, 06:46 AM

Reminds me of the film "A Bronx Tale" and the 'test'; to see if a girl is really for you.

HotDamnImAPhiMu · #20 12-08-2003, 12:06 PM

Decadence, you should specify. Lotsa girls esp. won't know the story.

Rudey · #21 12-08-2003, 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by xoheatherxo
no offense to this thread, but opening a door for a girl and picking her up has nothing to do with whether or not youre a nice guy. i was born and raised in ny, and except for those few times around the holidays, people rarely hold the door open for other people. its just a fact of life around here. and when i went to school in new mexico, everyone holds doors open for everyone. i personally wouldnt choose to date or not date a guy based on if he opened doors, picked me up, or bought me stuff. personality counts too ya know!!!! i think i can handle opening my own door and driving myself places.

That's total BS. When do people not hold open doors in NY? If I go into an office building, they hold open doors. If I walk into a department store the person in front of me holds open the door. Most of the time we have revolving doors actually. You must hang out in the lower income sections of ny or something.

-Rudey

decadence · #22 12-08-2003, 12:43 PM

Quote:

Originally quoted by HotDamnImAPhiMu: Decadence, you should specify. Lotsa girls esp. won't know the story.

Quote:

From the movie 'A Bronx Tale - directed by De Niro:
Sonny: Alright, listen to me. You pull up right where she lives, right? Before you get outta the car, you lock both doors. Then, get outta the car, you walk over to her. You bring her over to the car. Dig out the key, put it in the lock and open the door for her. Then you let her get in. Then you close the door. Then you walk around the back of the car and look through the rear window. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in: dump her.
Calogero: Just like that?
Sonny: Listen to me, kid. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in, that means she's a selfish broad and all you're seeing is the tip of the iceberg. You dump her and you dump her fast.

When I first saw this movie I was a kid. I remember thinking wow that's really great. And then thinking that central locking was the enemy of love and romance

.

absolutuscchick · #23 12-08-2003, 01:13 PM

omg!!!! i remember that scene!!! That's why I always look to see if his door is locked!!!

decadence · #24 12-08-2003, 01:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by absolutuscchick: omg!!!! i remember that scene!!! That's why I always look to see if his door is locked!!!

I knew you were one of the good ones.

swissmiss04 · #25 12-08-2003, 05:32 PM

I think I agree w/ Achtung...the feminazis (but NOT feminists...nothing wrong w/ being a feminist) ruined it. Sure I expect to be paid as well as my male counterparts and I expect my opinions to be valued equally, but I will never stoop to the behavior of some so-called "ladies" I've seen. I act in a way to attract the type of people I want to be with. If you act like trash, that's exactly what you'll get. Being feminine or polite does not make you in the least bit weak. It makes you civilized. Likewise, being macho or coarse does not make you strong, male or female. If a guy doesn't open a door for me, he's no good in my book. To me it's a sign of what type person he really is.

DeltaBetaBaby · #26 12-08-2003, 09:20 PM

Rudey does bring up a good point...what is the etiquette for revolving doors? DBBoy and I had that discussion the other night and came up with nothing.

James · #27 12-08-2003, 09:29 PM

The etiquette is: "After you" with a polite bow and gesture . . . and then you trap her in the door and SPIN . . . .

Quote:

Originally posted by DeltaBetaBaby
Rudey does bring up a good point...what is the etiquette for revolving doors? DBBoy and I had that discussion the other night and came up with nothing.

amycat412 · #28 12-08-2003, 10:01 PM

James, I agree w you 100%. Why do we settle? I have no idea. Lol. Because there are more substandard models than standard or upgraded out there???

AXJules · #29 12-10-2003, 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Rudey
That's total BS. When do people not hold open doors in NY? If I go into an office building, they hold open doors. If I walk into a department store the person in front of me holds open the door. Most of the time we have revolving doors actually. You must hang out in the lower income sections of ny or something.

-Rudey

I totally agree (although I realize some of the post was in jest.)
I think that as a society, we have just gotten ruder (more rude?). There are many people that will cut in front of you in a parking lot, not say thank you when you hold the door open for them, etc. Then again, there are still people who will hold the door FOR you, help you pick something up if you drop it, etc.

That being said, James I totally agree with your original idea. Girls if you are upset that your "nice" guy doesn't hold open the door for you....and I'm not even talking about opening it, i'm talking about holding it for you when he walks through it first....that's like, bottom of the barrel, basic manners. It's possible that he was brought up to behave that way, so if you call his attention to it he might change that for you. If not, it's not anything personal...but graduate to the smaller percent of the population that treat each other with respect. That immediately cuts the amount of eligible guys to a minimum but honestly, we all deserve at least that much.....I don't even deal with anyone less.
This is not a guy attack, it works the same way with women. Damn the uncouth!!!

xoheatherxo · #30 12-10-2003, 02:49 PM

rudey--first let me start off by saying that i think youre incredibly rude. just my opinion though. i think you misunderstood what i was trying to say before. to me, holding a door for someone is when you open the door and then step aside so the other person can go through. what you described before as holding it for the person behind you is not what i meant by holding a door. and how dare you assume that i hang out in low income sections of ny. maybe thats where you are all the time since you know so much about it! i thought these boards were to reply to stuff, not to put other people that you dont even know down. did you ever hear that saying if you dont have something nice to say?? maybe you should try it once in awhile cause this isnt the first time youve posted something like that!