Can Men and Women Ever Truely Be Friends?? - Page 2

Munchkin03 · #16 08-19-2003, 03:06 PM

Two of my very very best friends in the whole entire world are boys. One (friends since 6th grade) is a confirmed bachelor, so there's no sexual tension there.

The other, I've never felt any attraction to (I can't say the same in reverse, obviously). If I did, or he did, I wouldn't end the friendship.

For me, the only question now is finding suitable women for our wedding party. There will be so many boys!

#17 08-19-2003, 04:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Munchkin03
For me, the only question now is finding suitable women for our wedding party. There will be so many boys!

Just do what we're doing.... all of my bridesmaids are men!

DeltAlum · #18 08-19-2003, 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lady Pi Phi
What's you're reasoning behind this?

No reasoning whatsoever. Just not sure I've ever really seen opposite sex "friends" (I'm talking here about really good friends, not aquaintences) without sex or romance screwing it up somewhere along the way. I'm also talking about really lasting friendships -- not over a couple or a few years.

DeltAlum · #19 08-19-2003, 04:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Optimist Prime
haha

No offence, but its funny that you would be the one to say no.

None taken. I was pretty surprized at my answer myself.

Edited on further reflection.

I'm not claiming I know I'm right here. I'm only talking about my personal experinces. I do have a "friend" I dated in HS and college -- and we still are "friends," but we only see each other every two or three years. So, does that count?

I suppose it's a matter of definition. What really is a friend?

Lady Pi Phi · #20 08-19-2003, 07:26 PM

I guess the reason I am asking is because I am "involved" with this guy.

I've known him for 2.5 years. We've never been a couple and h'e never said it's just a physical relationship...although I have given him plenty of opportunities to tell me the "truth" and tell me it's just a physical relationship.

He always tell me that we're friends. So why doesn't he ever make an effort at a friendship? I do like him, and I always wished that we had something more, but I am mature enough to say ok, you don't have the same feelings for me, I can be friends. And I would like to try and have a good friend out of all this.

I just need to know where I satnd and ever time I ask him, it's always "friends"
I've even asked him why we never became a couple and his reasoning was I live too far away...I live an hour an a half away. I've never had a problem taking the bus...AND HE DRIVES!!!!

I am probably just wasting my time...but I would like to know what his problem is. Any insight?

If it was any other guy I would have been through with him by now, but for some reason I still like him and want to try and pursue a friendship with him.

deltaphi94 · #21 08-19-2003, 11:11 PM

I have to say it's possible. The oldest and closest friend I have is a guy I went to high school with. It isn't a concept that everyone can grasp, really, but it works for us.

ETA: (for DeltAlum)

We've known each other so long that we don't really remember meeting, so we're talking close to a 16 year friendship, give or take.

ADPiSAI · #22 08-20-2003, 01:34 AM

yes, it's totally possible.

most of my friends at home are guys. while in some cases there has been some attraction on one or both parts, there are a few guys to whom i've never been sexually attracted, nor have they been attracted to me. and no, they're neither gay nor horribly ugly.
and i've stayed friends with some of my exes. the others, well, not going there...

we had a huge 2 day debate/arguement about this in my italian conversation class last semester... it's definitely a more heated topic than anyone would expect!

SparkliiQTMTSU · #23 08-20-2003, 01:36 AM

It is definitly possible! I have so many guys friends that are just that....friends

and my best friend ever the first person I met when I moved to TN is a guy and I love him more than anything weve been friends for something like 11 years now and hes the best. so yeah I think its definitly possible. unless the guys are just whores or something lol j/k

Nichole

MTSUGURL · #24 08-20-2003, 01:55 AM

My best friend is a guy. He's absolutely wonderful and I love him very much. He's one of my all time favorite people, and I am so thankful for him. We have always been and will always be just friends.

MeLikey · #25 08-20-2003, 02:11 AM

I think it's definitely possible... 1 of my best guy friends and I were just always friends and his girlfriend is so sweet. There have been times when guy friends and I have crossed the line and hooked up... I admit it does make things awkward sometimes, but that usually wears off. However, I was seeing this one guy... wasn't with him exclusively, he didn't want to put a title on it... and when I was losing interest and wanted to just be friends, he couldn't handle it. I was so frustrated because I thought he was a cool guy and I wanted to be friends and hang out... yet when we did hang out he always wanted it to go further... I don't think he understood the concept of being friends after the occurrence of physical things.

1savvydiva · #26 08-20-2003, 02:42 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lady Pi Phi

I am probably just wasting my time...but I would like to know what his problem is. Any insight?

...well since you asked!

Honestly, I hope you don't take offense to this, but maybe if he is TELLING you that you are just his "friend", maybe he means 'cut-friend'. I think (with my limited knowledge of your situation) that that is a fairly lame excuse for him not to pursue a relationship with you (the distance factor), considering the fact that he drives. It doesn't sound like he wants a relationship with you...and if you DO want a relationship, you may need to cool things off before you get hurt.

Good Luck!!

lovelyivy84 · #27 08-20-2003, 06:12 AM

Yes but only if there is not ever any possible hint or chance that they might have sex at some future point. All my guy friends are people that I adore but who I would not.ever.in.this.world. have sex with.

And not because of that "like a brother" shite either. They're just not attractive to me and I am able to ignore them being attracted to me (or they're not that attracted to me either).

knight_shadow · #28 07-07-2010, 03:44 PM

Are you going to reply to every relationship thread ever created?

cheerfulgreek · #29 07-07-2010, 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sirishaa

hi
firstly you have to definitly terminate your realtionship with your ex and get settled before you want to start off in to freindship mode with your ex. it will definitely work once you and your ex come over your relationship. you will have the bestest person who knows your flaws to the core and being a man or woman will have his own side for all of your probable problems which may occur and this will be of great feedback for you to set your issues with your present relationship.
the feedback which you took as criticism will now become very useful.

Why are you giving advice about something that was posted 7 years ago?

Kevin · #30 07-07-2010, 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sirishaa

hi
firstly you have to definitly terminate your realtionship with your ex and get settled before you want to start off in to freindship mode with your ex. it will definitely work once you and your ex come over your relationship. you will have the bestest person who knows your flaws to the core and being a man or woman will have his own side for all of your probable problems which may occur and this will be of great feedback for you to set your issues with your present relationship.
the feedback which you took as criticism will now become very useful.

hi. it is most helpful for you to tell us this good information. i am learning very much and truly appreciate! also, do know that i am glad you edited to fix your grammars which are now impeccable. thank you for your most helpful advice on a thread of seven years of age.

sincerely,
kevin