American University date rape column angers students

[RU OX Alum]

What makes him under-informed? That he disagrees with you?

[RU OX Alum]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

I don't know whether you were being sincere or attempting smug sarcasm, so FUCK YOU just in case.

I would say when and where, but then you'd just cry date rape.

And yeah, I was just messing with you. I think this guy is a giant douche.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

I don't know whether you were being sincere or attempting smug sarcasm, so FUCK YOU just in case.

No. It's that he doesn't understand the difference between "victim precipitation" and "victim blame." Date rape, as with all forms of rape, is about more than just drunk and horny people. You can advise people on how to be safer without dismissing that type of victimization altogether. I wonder what he would say if someone laughed at the homosexual victims of power-based crimes that involve sex.

He's talking about date rape at fraternity parties. That is a relatively small percentage of the total rapes and sexual assaults that occur, but a larger percentage if we're only talking about college campuses. He needs to do his research instead of sniffing his own anus (not a gay joke) just because he has an opinion that he thinks is profound and "brutally honest."

He has to do better than this if he hopes to ever be taken seriously as a political commentator. We have enough political commentators who just get attention because of their delivery instead of their ability to have intellectual discourse.

The way he said it was stupid and intended to infuriate, not to encourage intelligent discussion.

BUT.

This is a grey area a lot of the time and both men and women HAVE to understand that you can't always prove rape in that situation and you can't always prove it wasn't. I've been in a situation, before you tell me I don't know what I'm talking about.

We had a guy come to our campus one time to start a discussion about that type of situation and he had people throw out situations and then he'd explain how it could be argued in court either for rape or against it. And it was really enlightening, because by the end of the discussion, we were all undecided. A girl will have her entire sexual history brought up and dissected and it's hard in most cases to prove she wouldn't sleep with a guy unless she had drinks. A guy will face judgment for not being able to tell a girl is too drunk to consent, even if he was drunk himself. What it comes down to is NEITHER should have sex drunk. It's too dangerous for both and waking up and not being able to remember what happened can be scary...and make it very hard to prove rape. It's a unique situation from rapes involving physical force or drugs. If a woman thinks she was date raped she shouldn't feel like she can't/should not report it, but she needs to understand what an uphill battle it will be if she chooses to and needs to understand the alleged rapist may not be convicted. It's a horrible choice to make, so the best advice is to use the buddy system and not go home with someone when trashed.

[Prettyface08]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

LOL!!

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Just going by the constant self importance.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

Just going by the constant self importance.

Your own?

For future reference, don't assume what others are thinking or are about to type. It colors the tone of your post and can distract people from what you are about to say. I didn't read the rest of that post but I would have if you didn't include the silly "listen to meeeeeeeee" qualifier.

[Munchkin03]

The kid is clearly one of those token campus conservatives who says stuff just to get people riled up. Not only did it work at AU, it worked on GC!

My undergrad was Ground Zero for a date-rape case gone terribly wrong. Basically, he said they had consensual sex; she couldn't remember anything because she was too drunk. John Stossel came to campus and everything! The University had to settle with the student for millions of dollars and now entering freshmen have to go through this boring role-playing seminar about how men shouldn't have sex with drunk women since they can't reasonably give consent.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Your own?

For future reference, don't assume what others are thinking or are about to type. It colors the tone of your post and can distract people from what you are about to say. I didn't read the rest of that post but I would have if you didn't include the silly "listen to meeeeeeeee" qualifier.

Nope. I can't wade through a thread without scrolling through snobby, snarky, self important insults aimed at others. You can't act expect others to give you the benefit of the doubt over and over again with the same result. I'm not going to, anyway.

If you didn't read the rest of the post, why respond? What a waste of time.

[Little32]

He is doing what he has seen work for countless others. Why let fact, informed opinions, and sound analysis get in the way, when inflammatory rhetoric gets you national airtime. He will probably be a great success; I mean he's already got the Washington Post quoting him.

[starang21]

how ignorant.

[DaemonSeid]

He's a jack@ss

[DaemonSeid]

You do girls scenic??

LOL

The things I learn on GC!!!

[sceniczip]

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

You do girls scenic??

LOL

The things I learn on GC!!!

LOL! I guess I should be more careful when I type!

Sidenote-funny story: My boss was e-mailing a bunch of people above her rank in the library and I don't remember what she was trying to type but she typed penis instead and sent it out. She was embarrassed at first but now she tells the story to anyone who needs a good laugh lol.

[APhiAnna]

If a drunken girl follows a guy back to their room, they are not insinuating that they want to have sex. They may just want to make-out, or they may consider the guy "a friend" and just want to hang out away from a busy party. So I think his statements were out of line.

I do, however, feel that a lot of rape laws are unfair towards men. At least in California, if a girl is inebriated and she consents to sex drunk, the next morning she can technically say she's been raped if she thinks she would not have done it sober. Obviously I think any guy who would have sex with a woman who is drunk beyond coherency (ie, throwing up, having trouble standing, clearly not aware of surroundings, etc) is disgusting. But if she is not in that state, and is just party drunk, and she consents to sex and then later cries rape I think it is incredibly unfair on her part. She chose to get drunk and should take the consequences.

If she is in a state of total incoherency like I stated above, or the guy forced himself on her when she is drunk, then that is a whole different ballgame. But I think as the law stands it gives women too much wiggle room for an action they should take the consequences for...it is unfair to the guys if she originally consented, and it is unfair to all the women who are actually raped because her claims tend to invalidate REAL date rape in many people's minds.

I do however think that the ridiculous claims (if she dressed slutty she is asking for it, "no" means yes) are absurd and disgusting.

My other pet peeve is when women claim they were rufied when it was clear to everybody at the party it was not the case...a girl I knew once claimed she was rufied when everybody at the party saw this tiiiny girl take upwards of 7-8 shots over the course of an hour...it is just as likely she blacked out. Once again, a man accused of rape/rufies is essentially guilty in the public's eyes, and it is not fair to him. It is also not fair to women that actually were rufied because when the situation is obviously "not" the case, it invalidates future claims.

[christiangirl]

Originally Posted by APhiAnna

"no" means yes

TWICE in the last month have I heard a man say this. RI-FREAKING-DICULOUS. I can't believe there are people who actually believe that.