LilLady's Fall rush 06' - Page 10

Lil_ChiO_Lady · #**136** 10-10-2006, 06:56 PM

Lillady, don't get discourage...it is totally normal to feel the way you do. It is a new experience for you and everyone else, and sometimes it takes a lil longer to adjust to. Just talk with your sisters at any opportunity you get and...

Maybe you can all plan an outing to lunch/dinner/movie/study groups etc with some sisters on yall's free time.School and other priorities do get in the way, but thats when time management starts kicking in and you definitly become more organized with everything and still have time to go to events with your sisters. Good luck!

UF56 · #**137** 10-10-2006, 09:42 PM

I was a founding member of my chapter too! Something we did that really helped was have twins (like big/lil). We also had families too...our consultants matched our twins according to our profiles and then grouped into families...sp it was like have a great big sis, grand big sis etc. Also we developed traditions within our families that are still be carried on now!! We also had a pajamma party/sleep over (with 154 members) at one the apartment complexes general use room and watched movies, made pancakes, told stories...it was a good way for us to have to get to know each other. Another thing your advisors/chapter consultant should make ya'll do is go on a retreat where you only have each other to talk to...no cells or anything like that. A lot of the sororities do this with their new member classes so they all will bond. Just some suggestions for you!!

knitsnpurls · #**138** 10-11-2006, 12:27 AM

Stick with it! While I didn't join a colony, I just rushed this fall as a junior and I was feeling the same thing at first. It seemed like a lot of the other girls knew each other, or lived in the same dorms on campus, and I felt like the odd girl out. It wasn't until our retreat that I felt included. Living off campus, and being an older student, it's a little bit harder to spend time with the other girls, but when you're in cabins in the woods, there are a lot less distractions. I found out that a lot of other girls were feeling the same way I was. By the end of the weekend, I went from knowing 4 or 5 girls' names, to knowing my entire pledge class and a lot of the girls above us (and there's over 100 of us!). Try talking to your advisors (or maybe take it upon yourself) to organize a retreat or lock-in kind of thing where you all can get to know everyone better. You can all share embarrassing stories or interesting facts about yourselves, and other stuff that will help you bond.

I really think it'll get better for you, but feel free to PM me if you need to talk about it, our stories are somewhat similar

EGAOPi · #**139** 10-13-2006, 01:48 PM

CONGRATULATIONS to you and Chi O! Colonizing this chapter, I know, is going to be a WONDERFUL experience that you will never forget. Good luck and I hope sorority life is everything you hoped for!

I am curious to know...which Ramone was AOPi?

EGAOPi · #**140** 10-13-2006, 01:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lillady85

Hello ladies

I have a question because I've been doing a lot of thinking lately.

It's been a few weeks since Bidday and I've been going to chapter and whatnot but I have started to feel as if something is missing. I don't know but...sometimes it feels that I'm missing out on a lot since I'm not usually on campus, I don't have classes with any of my sisters and even though I try talking to others...it just seems like I'm not clicking.

I don't want to drop and leave this behind, I was really excited to join but...I don't know. Is this normal? Should I feel kind of left out? I'm trying to go to activities but, for example, there is an event today that I wouldn't have been able to go to had I not already dropped my class that was during the same time.

I'm going to stick it out and see what happens but I'm feeling left out a lot.

Adieu, till next time.

What you are feeling is completely normal and I respect you SO much for coming out and saying this. I have seen so many girls hide their feelings and their relations within their chapter became strained. It's perfectly reasonable for you to have your doubts--you're human.
My advice is that you try to be on campus more often. Since you're a colony, I'm assuming you don't have a sorority house yet, but if they do build one, I strongly suggest moving in or hanging out there as often as possible.
Maybe next semester, you can schedule a fun class with some of your sisters.
Trust me, they understand that school is time consuming and school DOES come first--GLOs definitely recognize this. They know that you're busy and they know it takes time to get to know people. There is a feeling of belonging that comes along with a sorority but it can take some time before you feel truly comfortable. Try to connect with a hanful of girls. Try to plan lunches, dinners, coffee breaks--maybe between classes you can meet up with some of the girls for Starbucks or something to eat on campus. Just spend time with them and get to know them. Things will fall into place.
DEFINITELY stick it out. It is so worth it.
<3

AOIIalum · #**141** 10-13-2006, 03:09 PM

I'll be at DePaul in just over a week, and I'm sure I'll see lots of Chi Omegas on campus. It will be exciting for me to see a colonization in action, and I'm not even a Chi O!

Lillady, you are definitely not the only colony member who might be confused but I agree--please do whatever you can to get involved! Meet your sisters for lunch, study sessions, meetings, and of course there is the whole city of Chicago to explore! It might be hard since there are the two campuses, but hopefully you'll find other colony sisters taking classes offsite to meet up with at times.

Good luck to you and the rest of your colonizing sisters. It won't be long until you are the newest chapter of Chi Omega!

lillady85 · #**142** 11-10-2006, 01:35 PM

Wow, I haven't posted in what seems like forever.

Anywho, GC ladies, I have quite the conundrum and know not what to do. I hope someone an give me some advice.

As you know, ChiO colonized at my school and I was given a bid to become a founding member of the RhoMu chapter. I've been having fun going to chapter and meeting all my sisters and we even had our 'founding families' event which is similar to a 'big sis/lil sis' thing. Whereas before I was unsure about everything, I grew to really like being a part of something new and my feeling changed from my other post where I wasn't so sure. I've even kept every carnation and started making a scrapbook.
However, about a month ago I was given the option to study abroad (and this will totally give away who I am but it's not really a secret to my sisters) which I gladly took since I've always wanted to go to Europe. So one would wonder...what's the problem?

Well, it turns out I won't be able to be initiated with my sisters and I'm not even coming back until two weeks before school ends. I talked to our advisor and even one of my sisters about what I can do because I have some really conflicting feelings. When I joined ChiO I knew I wanted to study abroad but I didn't think it would be so long nor that it would be this year. Second, I also was and still am really excited to be a founding member except...I guess in my mind I won't really be and this is why I think I won't.
One, I'll be initiated all by myself while I really wanted to be initiated with the rest of my sisters. Second, I don't even know if I'll be initiated when I get back especially since school will be ending. Third, yes it's easy to share pictures and facebook wall comments, I'm going to miss out on pretty much everything our new chapter does. I can't even go this weekend to a mixer with another fraternity because I have to attend orientation for studying abroad.

I guess what I'm saying is that I'm really upset about this but to be honest, I'm going to miss out on a lot of what I wanted to do and so I don't know what to feel anymore. I won't be there to initiate traditions, vote on officers, I will never get to run as officer, plus a lot of stuff that I wanted to do. Plus...it just seems that they'll have a 5 month period to bond as sisters whereas I won't. Idon't know if this sounds like me whining but I don't know what to do anymore. If anyone ever had something like this...what did you do?

Drolefille · #**143** 11-10-2006, 01:59 PM

Will you have the opportunity to study abroad next year?

lillady85 · #**144** 11-10-2006, 02:22 PM

No, I can't. I'm a senior next year and there are classes that I have to take that are not only not offered while studying abroad but aren't offered this year either and you can only take as a senior, all of which I need to graduate. I didn't know my program was going to be five months and I wasn't told till after I had already signed since the final details weren't set in stone at the time.

blackngoldengrl · #**145** 11-10-2006, 02:59 PM

This is tricky. It really sounds like you are more upset about not being present for the planning and establishment of your chapter, than about not going abroad. I know the feeling of "I'm going to miss out on so much!" I went abroad too, though not for my founding semester and initiation....

Both experiences you will remember for the rest of your life, that is, living abroad, and establishing your new chapter, being intiated. But even so, I feel like your opportunity with your sisterhood is not even once-in-a-lifetime, as in...not very many women will experience establishing a new chapter (as an active sister), so its pretty special!

I think going abroad is something everyone in higher education should do at some point in their lives. Soo, is there a way that you could go in the summer, just after school finishes for the break?

33girl · #**146** 11-10-2006, 03:23 PM

I definitely agree with seeing if you could go in the summer.

Studying abroad is a wonderful opportunity, but lots and lots of people (the majority of them) have very full college careers without it. If you're going to be upset the whole time you're there and missing Chi O, it defeats the purpose. Can you get out of it?

Oh, and I just want to say that there's no way they should have made you sign ANYTHING without all the details (chiefly the LENGTH OF THE PROGRAM, for crying out loud) being in place!! If the rest of the program is going to be that thrown together, I would say funk dat...

PeppyGPhiB · #**147** 11-10-2006, 03:24 PM

At my school, approximately 60% of the students study abroad at some point. Most do it during their sophomore year, meaning sororities are often "missing" most of their soph pledge classes. Unfortunately, this means that sometimes the sophomores aren't given the chance to bond much with their sisters prior to going overseas for either a semester or a full year. Sometimes those women come back feeling very left out - and some drop membership - so the chapters work very hard at keeping in touch with women overseas, sending them care packages and photos and party favors, etc. What makes your situation unique is that you rushed as a junior, and the same year you're going overseas.

Since little can probably be done to change the situation, I would say go overseas as planned, enjoy every bit of it, then return to your chapter. Yes, you will miss being initiated with the rest of the colony, but you can be initiated later. Speaking as a founding member of a chapter, I can assure you that there are good things you will miss, but also plenty of not-so-good. The chapter will be making traditions for several years, which you will get to participate in as a senior.

PeppyGPhiB · #**148** 11-10-2006, 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl

Oh, and I just want to say that there's no way they should have made you sign ANYTHING without all the details (chiefly the LENGTH OF THE PROGRAM, for crying out loud) being in place!! If the rest of the program is going to be that thrown together, I would say funk dat...

No kidding. Lillady, how long did you expect you'd be gone? Many students study abroad for an entire school year. I'm surprised you didn't demand this info. ahead of time...what if it conflicted with other important dates/events/class schedules?

lillady85 · #**149** 11-10-2006, 03:45 PM

Hey,
Well, the program had said from January through March tentatively, so I would have still been here for Spring Quarter. I figured, one quarter wouldn't be bad since I'd still have 2-3 months left in the year. Except, it didn't work out that way.
As for studying during the summer, my school doesn't offer summer programs. If it was just any study abroad, I wouldn't mind so much dropping it but it's not. The reason I signed up to begin with was because of the extremely good internship that I'll be placed in with the EU. I had already tried to get the studyabroad office to place me for next year as a senior but due to classes, it wouldn't have worked out either.

Yes, I know in hindsight that I should have asked more info but at the time I was just so excited (and so were my parents) that the possibility of them changing the time frame didn't cross my mind and no one looked to see if anything could go wrong. Plus, I was still hoping that I would have been initiated with my sisters but chiO had set the date already and it's not like I could have asked for them to change it.

I'm still talking to my advisor but its not looking good as we speak. I told her that when I'd come back, I'd decide what I'd do then seeing as how it'll be nearly 6.5 months from now.

Drolefille · #**150** 11-10-2006, 03:58 PM

You can think about it this way, if you wait until you come back, you'll be the first initiation performed by your sisters.

As another thought, is there anyway you'd be able to fly home for initiation? Take a long weekend or something? It'd cost money, but it might be worth it.

Sorry I just ask questions, but I don't have any answers