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Being 'not boyfriends' or 'not girlfriends' implies refusal. If you're friends with benefits, its not time to fish or cut bait. The 'nots' implies that you've made your decision about this person and you will not under any circumstances be investing yourself emotionally.
Usually there is a reason why someone is a 'not.' Like, in the case of my best friend, this guy she was using had a really big neck and he was a really trivial guy. He was using her too and they both knew that under all circumstances, each other was a 'not.' They had been friends w/ benefits, tried to see if they could get along well enough for a relationship, they couldn't so "Under no circumstances that could ever arise in this earth would I date x." Yes that was a direct quite. And yes, then they slept with each other for two more months.
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