For Married People only

[BabyP]

Me and my friends were talking, if you get married, whats the average time you get pregnant, I think few years but she thinks right away. So my question is for those who are married, how long did it take you to have kids (Few years, few months) and if you have no kids, post how long have you been married....

[sageofages]

Originally posted by BabyP
Me and my friends were talking, if you get married, whats the average time you get pregnant, I think few years but she thinks right away. So my question is for those who are married, how long did it take you to have kids (Few years, few months) and if you have no kids, post how long have you been married....

Well, instead of an engagement ring, I got an engagement baby ! LOL.

It only takes a few moments of passion to get pregnant, the trick is timing of those moments to when you want to be pregnant.

Married a lot of years....5 kids. Timing is everything..and I was so accident prone !

[BabyP]

Originally posted by sageofages
Well, instead of an engagement ring, I got an engagement baby ! LOL.

It only takes a few moments of passion to get pregnant, the trick is timing of those moments to when you want to be pregnant.

Married a lot of years....5 kids. Timing is everything..and I was so accident prone !

how long were you with him before you got pregnant? that is what i am talking about.

[sageofages]

hmmm....first date on June 6...pregnant on Halloween.
Of course, we are still on that first date...cause I never went home , so many many years ago. Is it a record for the longest date? I bet it is.

Is that what you want?

[BabyP]

Originally posted by sageofages
hmmm....first date on June 6...pregnant on Halloween.
Of course, we are still on that first date...cause I never went home , so many many years ago. Is it a record for the longest date? I bet it is.

Is that what you want?

assuming you had sex on the first date andyou got pregnant in the same year, so thats like close to five months?

[sageofages]

Yes....but every couple can be different. We had no trouble getting pregnant, but with hormone levels we did have trouble staying pregnant.

When we had child #4, he was working out of state and coming home only on weekends. Child #4 was proof of a New Year's Eve visit (after having been gone for 6 weeks). It is all timing.

I guess I am curious *why* you are asking...this is all too antecdotal to be valid for research.

[Sistermadly]

Originally posted by BabyP
So my question is for those who are married, how long did it take you to have kids (Few years, few months) and if you have no kids, post how long have you been married....

Not everyone who gets married is doing it to spawn, you know...

[ISUKappa]

It really varies from couple to couple. I know couples who got pregnant on their wedding night and some that waited 10 years or more to even think about having kids. Much like anything in life, there is no set time. There is a myth that couples wait one year before trying to have kids, but that isn't true for everyone. And who knows, even though you may make the conscious decision to start trying, it doesn't mean your body (or your husband's) is going to cooperate.

We've been married for almost a year and we're going to wait a bit longer before we start trying. That's just what we feel is right for us.

[valkyrie]

Originally posted by Sistermadly
Not everyone who gets married is doing it to spawn, you know...

She said it before I did! Marriage does not equal children for everyone. Thank goodness.

[Jill1228]

We have been together for almost 7 years and married for a little over 2.5 years. Financially not ready for children. (He has one from a previous marriage). Hope to be ready in the next year or so though

[Speechpath]

been married 5 years, no kids

brother got married and they got pregnant within the first 3 months

Just depends on what you want and how old you are also, people who get married older tend to have families quicker, at least my friends did.

[adpialumcsuc]

Been married for 2 years and IF we ever have kids it won't be for a long while. Financially we have a lot to get done before we can take on the idea of having kids.

[kateshort]

Been married six years, no kids yet.

He just got a promotion/raise, and I get one next year. He also graduates from grad school next May. So next summer we're looking at moving, and once I get a house house (as opposed to a two-bedroom townhouse), it's Go Time. Assuming things go well relatively quickly, I'd be around 33 when I have my first kid.

I'm also a teacher, and next year September is when I'll get tenure. You can take off a year for pregnancy/childrearing if you have tenure, but it's harder to do if you don't.

I know people who wanted to start a family right away, and more that want to get financially and academically and geographically settled. I actually did the math to see what kind of house we could afford with $500 specifically set aside for child care expenses-- that's financially stable and settled to me-- but my husband's cousin who had just started grad school decided to go off the pill to see what the Lord's will was. The Lord gave them a baby pretty darn quick! So now they're generally okay but struggling to try to have child care and money for her to finish her degree to become a school librarian.

[CASIGKAP]

This is awesome to hear. I have a friend who's been married for 2 years, is 25 years old, & is frantic b/c her husband isn't ready for kids yet. He's 30. She is freaking b/c she thinks that having kids before she hits 30 is a must do! She's weird.

[kateshort]

Statistically, it is a little safer to have kids before 30, and a little more safe to have them before 35; your body is ready to have kids at *thirteen*, so ten years after that (around age 23), your body is primed to go.

With so many women waiting to get married until they graduate college, and waiting to have kids until they get their big job or until they (and/or their spouse) finish grad school, more people are 25-28 before they're ready to have kids. That gives you a smaller window to work with. Not like one of my ancestors, who we found in the 1900 census with 8 kids still living out of 11 pregnancies, and who had kids at age 18 through age 40!

She may want to spend more time with them as a young mom (easier to stand up to your teenager at forty than at sixty!). Or maybe there's some medical weirdness in her family that means it'll be hard for her to get pregnant or maintain a pregnancy. Or she just may want more control over her life.