Ugly Babies

[Sistermadly]

(Before you get the "all babies are beautiful" propaganda out of your mouth, let me say that this probably isn't the right thread for you! )

So one of my instructors had a baby a few days ago and posted pictures on the web so that the class could see them.

I'm in a largely female professional school, so when my classmates saw the photo, the women went crazy going "Ohhh!! What a cute baby! He's just PRECIOUS!" and all that kind of stuff like that there. Meanwhile, I exchanged looks with one of the only men in the class - who incidentally is a good friend of mine - and we both agreed that it was one of the ugliest, jugheadiest babies we'd ever seen.

I don't have much maternal instinct, I'll admit that straight away, but I'm curious: what do you do when someone shows you a picture of their baby and you know they're fishing for an obligatory "Oh, isn't little Vlad Dracul the cutest!" from you? Do you tell them it's cute, say something else, or make like you're busy so that they don't come over to your desk?

[greeklawgirl]

Originally posted by Sistermadly
I don't have much maternal instinct, I'll admit that straight away, but I'm curious: what do you do when someone shows you a picture of their baby and you know they're fishing for an obligatory "Oh, isn't little Vlad Dracul the cutest!" from you? Do you tell them it's cute, say something else, or make like you're busy so that they don't come over to your desk?

If approached, lie like a rug!

[PhiPsiRuss]

Originally posted by Sistermadly
Do you tell them it's cute, say something else, or make like you're busy so that they don't come over to your desk?

Hang up one of these over your desk:



Don't answer the cute baby question until they pass the eye test.

[Eclipse]

My mother and grandmother always said you say something like:

"What a fine baby!"

"Look how healthy he/she is"

or the basic "awwwwwww"

Usually you can find something to praise the baby on:

He has such a strong grip!

She's such a happy baby!

Look at all that hair!

I never say a baby is cute unless I mean it.

[GeekyPenguin]

I normally say something like "Oh, he has his fathers eyes!" or "What a cute romper? Who knit that?" or something to compliment a non-ugly part. Once I was feeling snarky and not a fan of the mother, so I said "She looks JUST like you!"

What Eclipse said.... I'm the maternal type that thinks *almost* all babies are adorable... but damn if there aren't some ugly ones out there. In that case, there's always..

"Oh, look how much hair he has!" (subconciously) .... on his feet
"What stunning eyes"... red eyes? Is this the devil child?
"What precious little features"... for a raccoon

you get the idea

[honeychile]

Originally posted by GeekyPenguin
I normally say something like "Oh, he has his fathers eyes!" or "What a cute romper? Who knit that?" or something to compliment a non-ugly part. Once I was feeling snarky and not a fan of the mother, so I said "She looks JUST like you!"

LOL!!!!

Anyone who's been a good rusher knows that there's always SOME redeemable quality one can mention, if necessary. And it's ALWAYS necessary when it comes to a baby!

I'm big on the "look at those cute lil toes!" or "Isn't he/she precious?"

[GeekyPenguin]

Originally posted by honeychile
LOL!!!!

Anyone who's been a good rusher knows that there's always SOME redeemable quality one can mention, if necessary. And it's ALWAYS necessary when it comes to a baby!

I'm big on the "look at those cute lil toes!" or "Isn't he/she precious?"

Exactly! My manager jokes that I should hold a mock rush school for other co-workers since I'm just so good at complimenting people, even if it is "My what a lovely necklace" while I'm thinking "Ma'am, your neck looks like a tree trunk."

[Nikki_DZ]

Okay, I am a new mother, and I have to admit...I THINK MOST NEWBORNS ARE UGLY!

I was terrified that I would think my daugther was horrid when she was born. I knew I loved her regardless, but I was scared of giving birth to something that looked like a plucked chicken. Thankfully (and this could be the maternal bias) she's gorgeous and perfect in everyway *gag gag* .

But back to the subject at hand...Never, EVER admit you think a baby is less than adorable (trust me from experience-I told a friend in junior high that I thought her baby brother was ugly. Her mother STILL won't speak to me!). I agree with greeklawgirl-lie like a rug, and then gouge your eyes out when you look away

[ThetaGrrl]

I think all babies are fugly for about 3 months at least, which makes me very concerned about ever having one. I'm glad to hear that Nikki_DZ was worried about this too, because I'm horrified of it.

Anyway, you could try the whole "Bless her heart!" Because, you know, kids like that need all the blessings they can get, right?

[honeychile]

I used to use the "Don't babies smell wonderful?!" line, until I got handed a muddy baby. blech.

Nothing says birth control like a muddy baby!!

[Sistermadly]

Ginger, you have me crying with laughter over here. "On his feet...". HEE!

[valkyrie]

LOLZ, I think that everybody knows I don't like babies, at all, so I'm usually not in a situation where I'm expected to comment on one. I'd probably say something like "Oh cool" and run from the room.

[KillarneyRose]

Anyone remember the Seinfeld episode with the ugly baby? Elaine and Jerry didn't want to come right out and say that the baby was fugly so they just said, "Oh, what a breathtaking baby!"

When my husband's brother's daughter was born 4 years ago the poor thing looked looked like a sack of flour with tiny, beady eyes. Trying to be diplomatic, but not wanting to lie, I commented that she was, indeed, breathtaking.

I guess my brother-in-law and sister-in-law didn't watch Seinfeld because they still talk to me.


Sistermadly, you KNOW you have to post the link now!!!!!

[greeklawgirl]

LOL, "You gotta see the bay-beeee!"