Unexpressed Racism Paranoia (URP)

[AKA_Monet]

I am constantly proving my thoughts in the scientific field... That is the nature of my field... However, I get more stares and roughing up not only because I am woman, but I am of African descent... I am not MEANT to be in this arena--ever...

But, the scientific questions I can answer or say, "I've not looked at that..." Whatever...

It's the ignorant racial questions that were once difficult for me... The issue was, these questions arose from folks that are SUPPOSED to be the "best and the brightest"--some of the most educated folks on the planet!!! And when I got them, I went into shock... Then, I got defensive...

And "to whom the gods wish to destroy, they must first make them angry..."

So, with the "answering questions" training I got for my Ph.D., I learned, that I should restate their question, which requires you to suppress every inch of your rage down, then ask these people how you like them to answer... Once you get yourself to do all that, then you start "crackin' up" 'cuz funny thoughts creep into your mind about what they just said... And it is like, you cain't hep yo-sef, you havta bust them out...

My Ph.D. professor skrait up asked me if I thought that students who attend a PWI faire better in science than if they attended an HBCU...

Now, he knew I attended an HBCU!!!

What was my answer...

I couldn't hep mysef... I said, the students are flunking out here!!!

Total shock on his part...

Nuff said...

And as you "practice" this tactic, you only get better...