Quote:
Originally posted by PiEp299
My brother who went through this process did so because when he joined his original fraternity, out of high school, he did it for the wrong reasons. All he wanted was to party. So, he joined that fraternity for that reason, and went overboard with drugs and alcohol, as that is what that chapter is known for.
He finally realized after a couple years that he needed to get his life in order. He dropped out of school and went into the military. When he finished his time he ended up coming to the same school as me, where his girlfriend was starting. He got to know some of us who had gone to the same high school as him. He then decided he wanted to become an associate member of our fraternity. After being one for a semester he decided that this was the kind of brotherhood he really wanted and for the right reasons this time. He disaffiliated his original fraternity and is now a brother of mine.
He is actually one of the better members because he sees through all the bull and knows how to get things done the right way.
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I think this kind of situation is different from someone who joins and after the first year says "Eew...I don't really like these guys/girls, XXX looks like they have more fun/better chapter/whatever, so I'm going to go join them when I transfer." In other words, the person doing that isn't really "learning from his/her mistakes" or maturing, just looking for more fun/more prestige/easier life. THOSE are the one's I would be leery about.
Right now, I like the NPC clause we have, because <flame protection on> it protects sororities from fickle young girls who aren't joining for even
some of the right reasons and when things get tough in one chapter or at one school, they just bail and go somewhere else (yes, I said this. I was once a fickle young girl so I can say that.) I've seen that happen....people run instead of grow....and that's where problems start.
As far as what sugarandspice and GeekyPenguin have said.....that's a whole other story. I see pros and cons of each side, and I don't really know what I would do there. I would have to think about it some more.
Back to the topic at hand (NIC), I would try to really explore and think about why this young man is interested in joining a second fraternity. What does he want to get out of it? What is he willing to put into it? If he's serious about this, I think he would be willing to discuss this with the brothers, as long as the brothers don't come off as "attacking" him. Depends on how it's approached. He obviously knows it could be an issue, otherwise he would have never mentioned it nor shown anyone the letter.
PsychTau
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