Fellow Sisterfriends: Hand Out or Hand Up

[sionnetier]

I am sorry, but in some ways personally I disagree. I have been researching for three years also. I am very discrete in my process, but if I see another person who is as serious as I am or even more, I will share certain information. I won't to anyone everything I know, but even if I or anyone else told them every ounce of information in the world, that WILL NOT GUARANTEE membership.

No matter how much you want to be a member, when it comes down to it they are going to pick who ever they want. Even if that does not include you.

I have given out information to serious prospects, but most of the information that I did keep to myself was information that directly had to do with certain eperiences with members I have had.

Also, why not share because someone else would have had to have shared information in some way or you wouldn't know what you know now.

[ClassyLady]

Originally posted by ENDROAD:

?

That is how the process was explained to me. What I don't know is if this is the same for every BGLO or do only specific BGLOs use this system?

UMMMMMM, I think we do have emails where this can be discussed PRIVATELY!

Thanks!


[This message has been edited by AKA2D '91 (edited June 19, 2001).]

[112Soul]

Greetings:

I know you said sisterfriends but I thought I would share something with you.

It is one thing to "help" (or should I say "help") another bro/sisterfriend out after and only after you know what their motivations are; it is another to "give" (or should I say "give") to those who are lazy and looking for a free handout. Mind you this is a lifelong decision and not some handout at the soup kitchen.

Having said this, I feel that whatever decisions are to be made you must keep the following things in mind:

1. Is the person I am "considering" (and we all should "cosider" instead of just DO!) a person I would have been friends with if it were not XYZ (or in your case AKA)?

2. Will this person still be my friend if neither of us make it (once you try out and don't make it you will be AMAZED at how many folks do 1080's. this is how you find out who is genuine and who is full of sh-)?

3. What has this person or what is this person capable of contributing to the pot (or team if you prefer to refer yourselves as a team)?

After analyzation, I feel that only you and only you can make that decision. I'm not speaking as a member of an organization but a young one trying to follow the correct path as you. But consider this, the way we ponder our thoughts of other people; those before us (I hope I'm not jumping the gun here) have pondered the same as us.

ONE

112

P. S. Feels good to be back.

[novella000]

I feel that 112.

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"No matter how worthy, admirable or fiercely desired the goal may be, it takes commitment and action to make it a reality."

[CJUS]

I want to ask Enroad were you referring to SF over the internet or on your campus. Well, I, myself am a SF. I couldn't beleve what I read. I thought that was what this forum was for---to guide us, SF, along with the assistance of the memberfriends, to the right path into Alpha Kappa Alpha land. If this is a situation on campus, I feel that you wouldn't even have this problem if you would have been discreet. I know that you may have been excited about expressing your interest to friends. I feel that it is okay to express your interest in xyz sorority in an anonymous way, like we all have been doing on GC. Now people know your interested. They may have an idea that you know somethings because you have been researching for three years. I also feel that this should have never been expressed. As a memberfriend asked, how would you feel if you didn't get in, and you leaked information to another SF, and they got accepted. It wouldn't have been a problem if you were discreet in your information. As you have said you were wrong to question someone else's knowledge and research, I agree with you. I have never had that idea in my head. I think it is commendable that Sf's are doing their research, and a SF may have looked over something that you didn't miss. Otherwise over the internet, I don't see how it woould compose a problem if you guided a SF to a source where you may have found some pertinent info that you may have thought would be beneficial to you sucess towards Alpha Kappa Alpha. The internet is anonymous, we don't know each other from Adam. It wouldn't hurt. We are supposed to be working together. So when I first came to GC, I was directed to the website www.aka1908.com. Your research is your research, if you want to keep it to yourself that's fine. You have gotten some good responses to your topic. And I hope it helps you.


Good Luck, SF

[CJUS]

I want to ask Enroad were you referring to SF over the internet or on your campus. Well, I, myself am a SF. I couldn't beleve what I read. I thought that was what this forum was for---to guide us, SF, along with the assistance of the memberfriends, to the right path into Alpha Kappa Alpha land. If this is a situation on campus, I feel that you wouldn't even have this problem if you would have been discreet. I know that you may have been excited about expressing your interest to friends. I feel that it is okay to express your interest in xyz sorority in an anonymous way, like we all have been doing on GC. Now people know your interested. They may have an idea that you know somethings because you have been researching for three years. I also feel that this should have never been expressed. As a memberfriend asked, how would you feel if you didn't get in, and you leaked information to another SF, and they got accepted. It wouldn't have been a problem if you were discreet in your information. As you have said you were wrong to question someone else's knowledge and research, I agree with you. I have never had that idea in my head. I think it is commendable that Sf's are doing their research, and a SF may have looked over something that you didn't miss. Otherwise over the internet, I don't see how it woould compose a problem if you guided a SF to a source where you may have found some pertinent info that you may have thought would be beneficial to you sucess towards Alpha Kappa Alpha. The internet is anonymous, we don't know each other from Adam. It wouldn't hurt. We are supposed to be working together. So when I first came to GC, I was directed to the website www.aka1908.com. Your research is your research, if you want to keep it to yourself that's fine. You have received some good responses to your topic. And I hope it helps you.


Good Luck, SF

[AKA2D '91]

To the top for our "new" SFs.

Soror Endroad, (when you read this thread), how do you feel now that you are on the OTHER side of the fence?

[ENDROAD]

Originally posted by AKA2D '91
To the top for our "new" SFs.

Soror Endroad, (when you read this thread), how do you feel now that you are on the OTHER side of the fence?

Soror AKA2D '91,

Now that I am a beautiful, elegant sophisticated lady of Allllpha Kappa Allllpha Sorority In'corporatated I realize that my hinderance to share information was not unfounded because NONE of the young ladies whom I considered sharing my research with were selected for membership. In fact, without going into details I can say that my prophytes expressed that they had serious (and duly founded, Nationals don't play ) reservations regarding these young ladies. In addition, I realize that 3 letters or the potential for such can get you a whole group of insincere friends. I am very grateful that my prophytes were able to see past the company I kept . However, though all of my research was not in vain and my prophytes were impressed with my prior knowledge but when it really counted THEY told me everything I needed to know.

So dear Sisterfriends in your quest for membership into my beloved sorority be mindful of your appearances, the company you keep and your behavior all the time even when you are away from campus because you never know when my Sorors are watching.

WOW I read all of the responses in this thread and I have to say as a OH SO SERIOUS sisterfriend I am not comfortable sharing my extensive research with anyone. First of all only a few people know Im a SF. I have spent years countless hours and plenty of money for info on this illustrious organization and when and if I am selected I will be happy to share it with my LS's. Then and only then. SF ENDROAD I am happy to say I knew the answers to all of your questions. My work is paying off.

[RedefinedDiva]

Bump, Bump, Bump!

I am just reveiwing some of the old threads as a "refresher" course. I came across this one and decided to answer it myself.

I don't share my info with anyone. I have hustled and worked my tail off for all the info that I have attained. I do not feel that I have to share with anyone. If you are serious about what you want, then do your thing and find stuff on your own. I don't mind pointing someone in the right direction, but as far as giving away info, I don't think so....

[miss priss]

I have thought about this long and hard...

I have been around a number of women who expressed interest in XYZ sorority, and I have found myself in some of the most awkward positions because some people THOUGHT I was well connected. Even though I may know certain people I have to work hard to obtain information for myself. Key word :WORK HARD. So if the person or persons that I affiliate myself with are not willing to "work" then I won't share a dern thing!
SF, some people try to maneuver information out of you because of sheer laziness. ( Just read DeRe's post, DST thread)
Discretion is the key. You can't tell everybody everything. If it was that easy then it would be an open membership to anybody. Finding the information is the fun part! Sharing experiences and bonding with other women have similar intrests as yourself (i.e. gaining a degree, career,etc.) is what's more important than just your whole conversation being XYZ!
Beware of people who do that (talk about XYZ everytime you see
them) she may be the person to NOT share info with. just my .02 cents.

[nachural]

Originally posted by ENDROAD

What year and where was the first Ivy Leaf planted?

I FINALLY FOUND THAT TODAY. DAMN IT FEELS GOOD TO LOOK HARD FOR INFO AND THEN GET IT


NACHURAL

[DEvynSince84]

Greetings Everyone,

I have the same PROBLEM. The majority of my friends (including myself) are interested in Alpha Kappa Alpha. The difference between them and myself is, most of them are legacys and I am not. I am very SERIOUS and DETERMINED, to become a member of this great organization. I too have all available info on the organization and the prospective chapter. I too have done extensive research, (read 2 books) I too have a binder full of research, the greek alphabet, and basically all the info I need/have access to(according to the chapter's graduate advisor), at this point in my quest. I ALWAYS make my personal resources available to my friends. I am always the one offereing information about activities and events hosted by the chapter on our campus. In my eyes, there is nothing wrong with helping THOSE WHO TRULY are as serious as you are. I have 1 friend, who is as serious about Alpha Kappa Alpha as I am(that isn't a legacy). This is the only person who I now offer ALL info to. In fact we constantly share and update info. When people are just asking because thier curious and don't have any intentions of pursuing the sister hood, or who you don't feel are AS SERIOUS as you, when it comes to Alpha Kappa Alpha, then I think you need to let them search on thier own. If you do share with others, who are not as serious as you, and by some fluke and accident they get chosen, it will be because of the sweat off your back and they will not truly be able to appreciate it because they didn't do the extensive research and go through the process that a true aspirant has to endure.

I'm interested in another sorority but I would like to reply.

As far as sharing information with other sisterfriends, for me it depends on the person who is asking for information. I am a really good judge of character. I can tell when another sisterfriend is only looking for the latest "scoop" and information. Especially at my school, it is CRAZY! Folks are running around like chickens with their heads cut off! I know when a person is truly dedicated, discrete, humble, and serious about joining XYZ sorority like I am! So I am more than willing to share and compare information with them. Now, if it’s a person that only calls me or says hello when they need something forget about it!

In regards to the "What is they get in and you don't" argument, I would honestly feel that was NOT my time yet. I'm a strong believer in everything happens for a reason. I would get the depression, crying and hurt out of my system, dust myself off and SIMPLY TRY AGAIN!

Stay strong my fellow sisterfriends!!

Originally posted by DEvynSince84
If you do share with others, who are not as serious as you, and by some fluke and accident they get chosen, it will be because of the sweat off your back and they will not truly be able to appreciate it because they didn't do the extensive research and go through the process that a true aspirant has to endure.

Hey DEvynSince84, I completely agree!!