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Annie, I think your question is valid, but I don't think it's only about African Americans. It's a minority thing. Women can pick on men, blacks can picks on whites, gays can pick on straights...because it's the "little guy" making fun of the "big guy." When the actions are reversed, it's not so funny anymore (even in instances where its true). Is it right? Well, not really. Is it going to change? Likely, no.
It's the same with a lot of situations. For instance, you might call one of your sorority sister's a "bitch" in an affectionate/joking way, but if a stranger comes along and calls her that you'd probably put him/her in her place.
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