I think alumna should ALWAYS help out a chapter in need. You have been there and know a little more than the typical college member so if they need you or anyone to help you would know!
You could use it to motivate...if they shape up and do really well with the help then you will not need to be there next time.
I think it is crazy to ask you not to come...I think if you were introduced and given the respect an alumna deserves then it would be an awesome recruitment experience for a Potential New Member...it shows there is sorority life after graduation and it really is a lifetime commitment!
I have been a sorority president and on Panhellenic and the most important lesson I learned was, what is in the best intrest of the chapter goes no matter the resistence!
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