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I just got married in May (in the South) and my reception was not at a church. In fact, I've been to very few church receptions. My reception was held at a country club and included an oldies band, lots of dancing, and a full meal. It wasn't all that different from every other wedding I've been to down here.
As far as the program attendant goes, I did not have one. I've done that for people before and it just really is a headache. Not an honor at all IMO. I had the ushers hand out programs as they sat the guests.
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