Be a better rusher

[lvandenb]

Hey ya'll! Ok, I need some help. Last fall was my first time to do formal rush. And during that week, I realized a sorority girl's worst nightmare....I'm a HORRIBLE rusher! Our chapter only pledged one of the girls that I personally rushed, and that wasn't even on bid day! She ended up joining through a cob. My sisters all just tell me to be myself, but I'm very outgoing, and when I meet someone for the first time, my first reaction is to be kind of crazy or nutty. I think I scare a lot of girls away, as bad as it sounds, and I feel like I'm letting my girls down. Does anyone have some advice or maybe a rush horror story that you fixed? I'd appreciate any advice.

[PhiSigFly]

My only advice to you would be to make sure their is more rotation with the rushees between your sisters. I am the recruitment chair at my sorority and their are sisters who are wonderful, but are... an acquired taste, I guess. Thats why we try to have as much rotation as possible. It wouldn't really give the girls a chance to form a negative opinion about you.

[PenguinTrax]

In addition to having a defined rotation (AKA 'bump') system, is to assign topics of conversation to the key sisters used in the rotation. That way you know exactly what you are going to talk about and it will help you concentrate more on the girl and not be so nervous. Sounds like your main problem is that you get flustered talking to the girls and you act out to cover your nervousness. Also - maybe you shouldn't be assigned to conversational situations the first round of parties until you get your bearings.

Barbara

[shadokat]

We have some women in our chapter who act solely as "filler". That means, they talk a little to rushees, but are never left alone in a situation they may not like. We also have workshops every semester with our new members and the entire sisterhood to deal with issues like conversation skills and such. They are really helpful. If you need anything like this, drop me an email.

[twinstars]

i know it sounds really cheesy but each fall in our rush workshops (rush isn't until jan.) we make sure to talk about conversation skills and even do some role-playing (one girl plays the rushee and the other is a sister) of various "situations" so that the new girls can see how it's supposed to work. maybe your house could try something along those lines? as a last resort, you could always try to get out of attending the rush parties by volunteering to be the person who tallies the votes or something like that.

[Rudey]

The bump system, or as we call it "The Pass Around System" works very well. But you can't just pass someone over to one person and expect one person to rush that girl. It doesn't work that way. She has to feel interested in the house as a whole and not just in one person. So yes you do have to work on your rush skills.

Here's what I recommend doing. Be attentive. People gravitate towards people who listen to them and not just hear what they have to say. This doesn't mean going "Hi I'm so and so...what year are you? where are you from? what's your major?". Pick something interesting to talk about. Test the waters. You've heard the saying "When in Rome, do as the Romans". It doesn't mean to be fake, but accompany your guest and treat her how she'd like to be treated. If she's silly, feel free to act the same (but moderate it). If she's not so open, then respect that. That is the key word. Respect. Rush is a series of events designed for prospective members. It's not our alumni event. It most certainly is not an intimate party with friends you've known for a long time.

I know this sounds terrible, but I was a bad rusher too and I loved it. There was so much pressure to get the girls we REALLY wanted in the house. So I would feel bad when I rushed one of our top girls and she dropped us that night. Finally I realized my talent was in the back of the room with the girls we knew wouldn't make it, or the girls we really didn't know very well. A lot of times I was able to just sit and talk with a rushee who was not well known because maybe she was shy or didn't have any connections to the house. (Some of those girls turned out to be our best members.) But what I realized is that the pressure is off in the back of the room. I was happy to leave the top rushees to the "professional rushers" as I like to call them.

[SLOTheta]

At our chapter, we have a week and a half of rush workshops, where we learn rush techniques taught by an ELC from Nationals. Maybe you could ask a national rep to come out and help you all, they are fabulous!