Dirty Rushing

[APhi2KD]

I really hate that this gal came here for advise and everyone is cross-examining every word she said.
If several members voted her high and she still didn’t get a bid, it is entirely possible someone in the other house could have been derogatory but she got a bid anyway. Both situations prove it doesn’t come down to one person.

Thank you for sticking up for me. I will never post a question again and I hope admins remove this post. As far as the misleading comments some of them were in writing via text so no misunderstandings. As far as the girls liking my daughter again many texts and also most were old family friends so if they lied it would be really uncomfortable since I envision many future events together but maybe they hate her but I doubt she would have made it to pref night if that was the case. As far as the body shaming is concerned if someone mentions a body part it is awkward and people giggle because they do not know what to do. Think about it. Regardless of intentions it is inappropriate and makes some one self conscious. Please try not to doubt anyone that experiences body shaming. I assure you it is humiliating and know one ever wants to be that girl. Your doubt and opinions contribute to victim blaming which is not something a sorority should support. Again many thanks to those that left thoughtful replies.

[carnation]

You wanted advice. people gave it, you didn't want to hear it.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Tdlegacy

As far as the body shaming is concerned if someone mentions a body part it is awkward and people giggle because they do not know what to do. Think about it. Regardless of intentions it is inappropriate and makes some one self conscious. Please try not to doubt anyone that experiences body shaming. I assure you it is humiliating and know one ever wants to be that girl. Your doubt and opinions contribute to victim blaming which is not something a sorority should support. Again many thanks to those that left thoughtful replies.

I hate to break it to you, but the women in the chapters aren’t programmed robots. They’re occasionally going to say things that are cringey, inappropriate, hurtful or flat out dumb because they’re under pressure just like the rushees - if they’re a small or struggling chapter, probably MORE pressure.

What happened with her meeting with the sorority president? The fact that this even was set up shows me they regret what was said. I’m not sure what more this sorority has to do to show they’re sorry your daughter felt embarrassed. They gave her a bid, for crying out loud - they want her to be their sister.

My daughter set up the meeting with the sorority president to explain to her what happened just so she was aware of the situation. It was not to get anyone in trouble it was just to have a two way face to face conversation. They had a pleasant conversation and that was that nothing more.

[carnation]

Well, they offered her a bid and she didn't want it. Not sure why she spoke with the president unless she wanted to rat out the members who insulted her bodily feature.

Carnation please stop making assumptions. We have taken peoples advice. She did not rat out anyone. She is trying to do the right thing (as was suggested by another on this thread) and my executive office and have a mature conversation. Nothing further has happened. Maybe the girls will be friends or maybe they will never see each other again. I don't know and only time will tell. All I know is she is a 17 year old kid who is made fun of constantly for something that is out of her control. It was brave and mature of her to face her insecurities and a learning lesson. Do you want me to tell her you inferred she is a rat so she is totally crushed? I have already apologized to anyone if they were offended by my posts. I am not sure what else I can say because honestly I am speechless.

[carnation]

I really don't care what you tell your daughter that a stranger on the Internet said. I assure you I won't be crushed. Nor should she.

And there are several of us who are wondering why she spoke to the president of the unwanted sorority. To tell her why she didn't deem them worthy of pledging? To tell her what the girls said about her body part? Something is really bizarre here and not adding up.

Back off, mom. She's at college and doesn't need you bulldozing for her.